<p>Okay so i wrote this a couple weeks ago and turned it in to my AP English teacher. Other than a few grammatical errors, she said it well written and gave me a 30/30. I just want a second opinion on the context of the essay. Any suggestions will be appreciated!</p>
<h1>1) Describe the world you come from for example, your family, community or school and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.</h1>
<h1>2) Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are</h1>
<pre><code>Most individuals use the term world to describe their place of being, or from where they originate. I, on the other hand, find a more figurative interpretation meaning ones life and what he/she has done to shape it. Throughout my life I have believed that it is every humans duty to contribute something, no matter the size, to the sum of human knowledge, in order to fulfill our collective goal as a speciesprogress. What significance do we have if we have nothing to show for it? My life, or world as one would call it, has shaped my vision to the utmost exactness, and it is my life that will ultimately accomplish my goal of contributing to human understanding.
My family, perhaps the largest influence on my life, has inspired me to want to succeed in life, and to eventually lead a life filled with humbleness and satisfaction. My father, in particular, is by far the hardest working man I have ever known, accompanied by a never give up attitude. When I was younger, I hadnt yet developed a work ethic and didnt care about school. It was he who pushed me through my studies and thus I credit him for giving me a will to work. He is a excellent role model for me, because whenever I was unsure of what to do in any situation, he would give me proper advice and guide me step by step through the process. Also, my mother has cared for me my whole life and has ensured that I am on the track to success. She too serves as an excellent role model through her hard working nature and willingness to help me with any emotional or mental task. Without them, I guarantee that my outlook on life would be radically different, and I would possibly not even consider going to college.
One other aspect that has had a major influence on my life is my church, and Christianity as a whole. I can also think of my fellow Christians as my family, because they are always there to support me if I am struggling. Though I am a logically thinking science-oriented person, I have committed my life to Christ and have found great humbleness since then. Through years of research, I have found that science can be used to provide evidence for the existence of an intelligent designer, if not God himself. Consequently, when I do become a respected scientist, I can walk into any laboratory or lecture hall and use science, the father of logic and reason, to make any initial skeptic of religion a believer. I feel that this is Gods obligation for me, and I will some day fulfill it.
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<p>My family and church, the largest influences on my life, haveto this pointeffectively shaped my vision and goals by giving me a support frame on which I can build my life. Without this frame, I would never accomplish my aspirations because I would be lacking the essential qualities to do so. Many such traits that would be essential to my career are: teamwork, leadership, willingness to work, and never giving up. With these developed qualities, I will some day accomplish my dreams and live a fulfilled life.</p>
<p>Curiosity is the underlying factor that drives human progress. Without it, humans would never have advanced past the age of stone and caves. It is ultimately the ability to ask why that has led us to make all of our innovations and advancements in all fields. My question that I pose to myself can best be expressed in the words of the great Stephen Hawking: What is it that breathes fire into the equations [that govern the universe] and makes a universe for them to describe?
Since a young age, the dominant quality I have exhibited is curiosity. I often looked at an appliance or device of some sort and wondered how it worked and what it did; I wanted to know what made things tick. It was natural that my constant quizzical nature led me to the field of science, specifically astrophysics. Now I want to know how things function on a larger scale, including quasars, general relativity, pulsars and even the difficult topics such as black hole gravitohydromagnetics. Only by completely understanding these subject matters can I quench my insatiable thirst for knowledge.
My dream, simply put, is to obtain a Ph.D. in astrophysics with which I can study the universe, and collaborate with top scientists from around the world. I feel it is my destiny to contribute something to the unfinished blueprint that is our universe; this blueprint having been drawn by all great physicists including Newton, Einstein and Hawking.
While my curiosity is what brought me to science, my talents are what I believe will help me in my future and obtain success in my career. My talents that I have demonstrated most frequently are my: ability to work well under pressure, art, public speaking, and ability to write coherent non-fiction. For instance, I can utilize my skill of writing to publish a book that may inform readers of my research, with all illustrations done by myself. My skill of public speaking could be harnessed to present my research to other physicists, as I won first place in the school-wide speech contest in 8th grade. I know these talents will play an integral part of my career and will help me obtain my goals.
Overall, curiosity is my enduring quality and I am proud to have it. My curiosity about life and the world in which we live has sculpted my vision to desire a better understanding of the universe and to want to contribute something to human knowledge. I am satisfied with this ambition, as it gives me a pathperhaps a rather arduous onein which to take in life, and when accomplished, I will feel completely and utterly satisfied.</p>