<p>hey guys, can you please look over my UC personal statements.
thanks a lot.</p>
<p>I really want to get into berkeley so please criticize it all you want.</p>
<p>Prompt 1:
While sitting in the back seat of my minivan, I retrospected on my life and my ever changing environment.
Is my world still the one which included my parents during my kindergarten years? Continuously jumping, trying to reach the distant monkey bars on the playground, I challenged myself to fulfill this wish. Suddenly two arms grabbed me by my side and pulled me farther than I had jumped helping me to grab hold of my goal. My face lit up as my five year old dangled from the monkey bars and my smile emitted gratitude towards my father for his kindness. Sitting on the swings, my elementary self yearned to get the swing to move. My slight jerks back and forth wobbled it for a few seconds, only to stop once I got tired. My mother, sitting on the nearby swing, instructed me; within minutes, I felt the air rushing by my ears as I oscillated on the swing. The shimmer in my eyes recognized the contribution from my mother for my success. Teaching and encouraging me throughout my first 17 years, my parents became the center of my world.
Is my world still the one which included my grandparents who first inspired me to study medicine and become a doctor? Since I saw my grandparents once every two years, every second spent in their presence was precious. Sitting on the ground in our house in India, my grandparents casually talked with my cousins and me. As our chatting continued, my brother asked my grandfather what his dream was as a child. The laughter that came was surprising, but the words that followed were unforgettable. He replied saying I aspired to become a doctor but due to political struggles of the nation and economic hardships on my family, this dream never became reality. Such words, resonating in my head, helped me to realize my passion for biology and amplified my aspiration to becoming a medical practitioner.
Is my world still the one which included my classroom environments and lectures in Anatomy and AP Biology where I first gained knowledge of the human body and other living organisms around me? Dropping academic marketing on the second week and switching into the hardest honors course at Green Hope, I stepped into Honors Anatomy and Physiology knowing that here lay the door to new opportunities and an intriguing curriculum. Given a 1500 page textbook and a stack of missed assignments, the pressure set in from the first day. Regardless of the course load, the textbook information and in class labs each day strengthened my liking for the subject. The following year, my passion for anatomy led me to enroll in AP Biology. The combination of these courses corroborated my desire to become a doctor.
I have just begun to realize my world. It is the conglomeration of my family, my environment, and my experiences. Each in its own way has contributed to my ardor for biology and the medical field. </p>
<p>Prompt 2:
In the middle of a swamp crowded with poisonous snakes, snapping turtles, and insects the size of a finger, I stand armed with only waterlogged brown trousers, a seine net, and a rubber boot. I thrust forward into the black muck with my defenseless foot, only to have it swallowed up by nearly a foot of mud. I jam the end of the seine net into the mud for balance and hopelessly glance back at the brown colored surface for any trace of my other rubber boot. I try to lift my other leg but the ground itself seems to resist letting go of its newly acquired possession. I try to swing my leg out, only to lurch forward, I let go of the net and flail my arms in an attempt to backpedal, but the quicksand-like mud grabs hold of my feet again and I topple into the grime, falling into disgusting goo.
Advanced Placement Environmental Science, or APES as the acronym goes, stands alone for me from the other humdrum classes of high school. After reading the description on the course catalog, I expected a class that would convince me to throw away all my light bulbs for fluorescent versions, protest for the rights of trees everywhere, and join Greenpeace. Instead, I started planning cities, cleaning tiger cages, and even filtering polluted drinking water. I learned that cities are not as eco-hostile as previously imagined, for they have high population densities, often successfully utilize mass transit, and have a higher average quality of life. I learned every animal has its own niche in an ecosystem to the point where different birds habituate different places of the same tree because they are the best evolved for it.
After my newfound affinity for the subject, I competed in the ecology portion of science olympiad. I also ended up writing two important papers for the class. For one I devised an experiment to test the effect of pH on the growth rate of a wetland fish. On another, I measured the effect of temperature on biodiversity in a wetland using real data from previous years of APES classes. They were my first attempts into writing as a scientist, and it was the first time I proudly turned in a formal research paper on a subject which I was enthusiastic.
Of course, there were times where I had to push myself like when I had to read about the negatives of growing fish on a farm as opposed to the ocean at three in the morning. Yet, those moments become gray and forgettable next to all the amazing ones. APES other than all my other science courses has given me practical knowledge about communities around the world.
I know I want to help find alternative forms of energy, so the world can become less reliant on harmful fossil fuels and get around to installing my new fluorescent light bulbs. APES exposed me to a realistic solutions to contemporary difficulties that pervade our Earth. Not only did this semester of hard work pay off in building my personality, it opened my mind to explore multiple panaceas for complication.
I gasp for breath on the shore of the wetland as I unravel my net for its treasures. I find tadpoles, hermit crabs, and bluegill, all flipping and twisting in protest. I record my findings and gently situate the creatures back into the murky depths of the wetland. In that harsh bog, I found a beaver, creating a home for the winter ahead. In that muddy quagmire, I saw the tiniest frog, trying to remain hidden on a blade of grass. And, in that small marsh, I found a world and all of its joys.</p>