UC Prompt 1 Please helpppp

<p>hey everyone, this is my UC essay, please feel free to comment give constructive criticism, rage, etc. Any help will be welcome!</p>

<p>The UC personal statement prompt #1 states, "Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
Out of all the places of the world, I was born right in the heart of the Silicon Valley, home to a vast array of technology. My parents were not as lucky as me; they were first generation immigrants from India. Though they grew up in middle class families, the lack of material comforts did not deter them from seeking a good education and becoming engineers. Growing up, my parents instilled in me the value of good education, work ethics, perseverance, faith, family, and service to my community. I have and will always try to pursue these values which I learnt early in my life.
Living in the Silicon Valley has given me a natural affinity for technology right from my young age. My parents regularly talked to me about their work and told how things I was studying at school were important in pursuing a career in science and technology. My father had worked for a bio-tech company which developed medical devices. He would demonstrate the device and explain to me how the technology that he and his team developed mitigates pain. My father’s research spurred my interest in the function of human body and brain as well as the intricate workings of hardware. I knew from then on that I wanted to go into the biotechnology field. To prepare for this goal, I took accelerated courses in my school, such as Chemistry Honors and Biology AP. My mother got me interested in the field of statistics. I became very interested in this field and took Elementary Statistics at De-Anza College. I am currently learning JAVA to pursue my interest in computers.</p>

<p>My parents encouraged me to be a well-rounded person and pursue multiple interests. For six years, I have actively pursued cricket as a competitive sport and have been actively involved in the cricket community. My effort was rewarded when I was recently selected as the reserve wicketkeeper for the U.S. Under-18 national team. My experiences in cricket taught me how to handle both failure and success, which has been useful for me in many ways. Through this I have learnt to pursue my dreams even if I face obstacles.</p>

<p>My family and my church community taught me about my responsibility to give back to the community. I did various activities to give back such as playing in concerts for band. I spent time volunteering at the Children’s Discovery Museum of San Jose, a place where children could engage in creative activities. It was my responsibility to ensure that all the activities run smoothly. Though at times my job was difficult, I would always feel satisfied that I get an opportunity to serve others. </p>

<p>My experiences with my family, my church, my school and sports community has prepared me to face the future with confidence. I have learnt the importance of hard work, perseverance, and service. I have realized that pursuing my passion in bio-technology to find new ways in helping mankind would be one of the best ways I can give back to my community.</p>