<p>I need help! This is a very rough, rough draft of my college essay, and i would like to know strangers educated opinion on it.:) You can e as brutally honest as you like. I just need some guidance in the right direction and tips on how i can make this better. I;m not n outstanding writer and i feel like I'm rambling throughout the whole essay...</p>
<pre><code>We as humans endure trials of adversity throughout our lives; every single one of those trials helps define who we are as people. Mine was relocating around the country a great deal as a child. I never had a permanent home for more than three years (the most was seven years). I've gone to a total of three elementary schools, four middle schools, and two high schools in the 12 years I have attended standard education. This is because my dad was an active duty Marine in the United States Marine Corps for 25 years who served faithfully and loyally to his country. Being the child of a Marine has had an enormous impact on my life and shaped my dreams of becoming a biomedical researcher; it forced me to grow up fast, it taught me how to be a more outgoing person, and it exposed me to a whole spectrum of diverse people.
A big year for my family was 2003. That was the year my dad got deployed to Iraq for a tour. In that same year, during my dad’s deployment, my little sister was born. Mom had to take care of sister for four months without the help of my father. As only a six-year-old, I had to step in as the oldest to help my mom take care of my new sister. I would watch her when my mom was making dinner, and I even learned how to change her stinky diapers like a pro. Ever since then, it has been my responsibility to care for and protect my little brother and little sister. That kind of responsibility has made me more mature in a sense that I am serious about taking care of the people I love.
At every new destination my family settled in, there was always some outgoing person who befriended me, and it is those people I aspire to be like. If I learned anything from being the child of a Marine it is to welcome those who are new to my community just like so many other communities welcomed me. I strive to make new kids at school feel welcome, and I tell them if they ever need anything or have a question to not be afraid to come up and ask me. Because so many people have reached out to me with my journey across the states, I feel that it is my duty in return to reach out to the people of the world by dedicating my life to trying to improve their conditions by improving their health.
As I grew older, I became accustomed to moving a lot; because of this, I became more adaptable to new places and surroundings. I have lived on both coasts and experienced both culture sides of the American people. People on the east coast act, talk, and treat people very differently than people on the west coast. When I moved from Colorado, where there is a small percentage of a minority population, to Southern California, where I have been exposed to people of many cultures and backgrounds. Exposure from moving to a place like California showed me not only many different races of people but the polarity of a wealthy versus poor society. Through that process, I learned to welcome people of different backgrounds, and to be open to all walks of life.
Throughout my whole life I witnessed the hardships people endured and I could never do enough to help them. My ultimate goal in life is to help people, just like my dad did, and my life experiences shaped that goal. From my experiences I learned how to be responsible, care for others, adapt to changes in my environment, and be a friend to whomever needs one. I know by chasing my dream to become a bio-medical researcher, I can fulfill my desire to help people who are in need by finding ways to prevent and treat diseases.
</code></pre>