<p>I'm worried my essay is too "in the moment." If anyone can give me some feedback and any criticism that would be great. I realize it's stupid to post the essay here but I cannot pm (don't have 15 posts).
Thank you. </p>
<p>Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?</p>
<pre><code>As I sat there, staring at the mud crusted onto my boots, attempting to calm my breathing, and dreading the hill before me, I began to think that maybe if I gave up now everything would be easier. Only five days earlier, I was eager and ready to explore the sublime landscapes of southern Utah and the Escalante Region. I had been greeted with this opportunity at school and immediately chose the "Canyoneering" Caravan to start off the first week of summer. Because I had always loved hiking and had minor backpacking experience, I believed I was ahead of the game and ready for this new adventure. Little did I know that it would turn into a struggle, both physically and emotionally, while also being one of the biggest eye openers of my life.
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<p>The week started off smoothly: we had driven hours north to where we set up camp, everyone in the group was getting along, and the landscape was beautiful. Over the next few days, we hiked down and belayed into the slot canyons near camp and explored hieroglyphs left by settlers decades before. The problem came around the 5th day. By then I was worn out from all the strenuous hikes and change in diet and it was time to backpack out of Paria Canyon. The group and I began the hike early in the morning, hoping to get back to the van in the afternoon, but soon I was faced with my own personal challenges. With the weather too hot, bag too heavy, and surging tiredness coming upon me, I started to pity myself. I started to feel like I shouldnt have to be working so hard and pushed so far, I should be able to take a break even if the rest of the group is able to go on. That is why when I stopped to catch my breath, I didnt want to start again. Even with everyone urging me on and just one big hill left before the end, I refused to keep going. Luckily, a couple people offered to take some of the stuff in my pack and my friend stuck back with me until I was ready to make the final ascent.
That night was solo camping. Each member in the group was placed in the desert by themselves with a tent, some food, and their notebook. We were not to go find each other, but reflect on our own experiences throughout the trip. Sitting alone, I could finally come to terms with what had happened that day. I realized I didnt have to go, I had wanted to. My selfishness caused the rest of the groups time, will, and patience to diminish. Earlier, I didnt think about how hard the trip couldve been on them also, but only how it was affecting me.
Im ashamed that I put the thought in my head of accepting failure, but proud of whom I have become in response to what happened. From that night on, I made a commitment to myself to persevere even if the outcome appears bleak, on no occasion hold my fellow team mates or community members back for my own benefit, and to help other people through their own conflicts. No one else can take responsibility for the complications I experienced, but I've sought to correct them. Caravan was an experience that will always be in the back of my mind with everything I do. Though it was tough, it made me mature more than I ever wouldve imagined.</p>