<p>^ Somehow, thousands of graduates do it each year. Graduate without parental help and survive.</p>
<p>or what most actors do (is she an actor?)- move to NY City or LA and wait tables and wait for their big break?</p>
<p>schoolhouse–I wouldn’t recommend living on Short Vine to anyone, and it’s more probable the girl lives in an apt. on the other side of campus, very close to CCM. </p>
<p>I actually lived in the dorm closest to CCM my entire 4 undergraduate years there. Convenient and safe to the point of being cloistered. :)</p>
<p>The parents chose to send her there, when she had full scholarship offers elsewhere. That was when the contolling behavior started. The articles all say her parents were caring enough to pay the extra to send her there, but given their more recent behavior, I wonder if that was not calculated from the beginning. If she had gone to a school with a full ride, they would not have been able to hold their financial support over her for 3 years. They were paying, she was beholden to them. She may have been naive enough (most are at age 17 or 18), to not realize the game they were playing when they suggested they should pay $20,000 each year, rather than accept a full ride.</p>
<p>Smokymtngirl, you are in a position where you know your parents don’t plan to contribute, and can plan accordingly. She on the other hand, had the proverbial rug pulled out from under her. I would consider your case similar only if they had promised to help pay, allowed you apply ED to your dream school, and then declared they wouldn’t pay a dime. Though you would at least be in a position to turn down an ED admission due to financial reasons, and apply elsewhere.</p>
<p>I really think this is much more complicated and much less calculated than just a parental desire for control. They probably don’t even know they are trying to control her. They probably think they are trying to protect and guide her. And she, experiencing a taste of freedom, is having none of it. They were wrong and went too far. But in my opinion so did she and now this is just a tragic mess.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>actor12–according to all reports, the young woman and her mother in 2011 had a physical altercation at the young woman’s apartment. She called in a police report of an assault by her mother. The mother did not deny the event only she claimed that it was the daughter who assaulted her.</p>
<p>At least in my state, the government website for domestic violence protective orders counsels that the person report each and every event to the police and make sure others know about it. Here the young woman was an only child and apparently let UC know about her concerns. The “tragic mess” in situations involving relatives, significant others and spouses can be lethal/fatal. </p>
<p>As I read the reports, after the assault event and after the parents had stopped paying tuition, the parents were still accosting (as one report discribed the event) her at and outside of her performance venue in Ohio some 600 miles away from where the parents lived. The Ohio stalking restaining order issued only after the assault event, after the parents had stopped paying tuition, after the accosting event and after two court hearings and a failed court-ordered mediation. </p>
<p>What action on her part do you see as “wrong” and as “going too far?”</p>
<p>07Dad,</p>
<p>Could you give a source for your info? I’m not being snarky; I want to read it. I’ve read several reports and they all say the same thing. Police were called to the D’s apartment. The reports do not say who called, but it’s my guess it was dad. (Admittedly, that’s speculation on my part.) In any event, the reports I’ve read said that when the police arrived, the D said mom assaulted her. The mom said D assaulted her. The police did not recommend charges, in part because they could not figure out who was telling the truth.</p>
<p>The way you tell the story gives it a quite different “slant.” You tell it as if the D is obviously telling the truth and mom is obviously lying. Again, I think that’s unfair. I’m NOT saying the mom is the one telling the truth. I am saying that I see no basis on which we can know who is telling the truth.</p>
<p>Here you go.</p>
<p>[Aubrey</a> Ireland, of Leawood, wins stalking order against parents](<a href=“http://www.kshb.com/dpp/news/region_kansas/johnson_county/aubrey-ireland-leawood-woman-gets-stalking-protection-order-against-parents]Aubrey”>http://www.kshb.com/dpp/news/region_kansas/johnson_county/aubrey-ireland-leawood-woman-gets-stalking-protection-order-against-parents)</p>
<p><a href=“http://www.thetowntalk.com/article/20121226/LIFESTYLE/121226018/Ohio-judge-orders-stalking-parents-away-from-daughter[/url]”>http://www.thetowntalk.com/article/20121226/LIFESTYLE/121226018/Ohio-judge-orders-stalking-parents-away-from-daughter</a></p>
<p><a href=“Aubrey Ireland case: Student, 21, wins a stalking order against her PARENTS who monitored her every move 'to make sure she succeeded' | Daily Mail Online”>Aubrey Ireland case: Student, 21, wins a stalking order against her PARENTS who monitored her every move 'to make sure she succeeded' | Daily Mail Online;
<p>I’d appreciate it if you would post your sources as well.</p>
<p>*They probably think they are trying to protect and guide her. *
Actor, maybe we can add this: once you are a parent, you learn that it’s not always our good intentions that matter - or how we can “defend” our actions. It’s what the result is on the child, now and over time. And yes, some of it is defined by society, even if not laws. It’s never easy to let go; many times we can only hope and pray our kids make the right decisions, especially as they grow more independent, and that nothing harms them. But, we don’t generally install monitoring equipment, get into assault situations, make a public fuss and report instability to college personnel. Etc. </p>
<p>Actor, I am also curious why you seem interested in performance, if you feel that Aubrey, with her experience and awards, has no prospects.</p>
<p>Police reports. Restraining orders. TV talk shows.</p>
<p>I still don’t know who called the police but they disagree about who accosted who and my guess is it is a big mess with plenty of blame to go around. </p>
<p>The report says she attempted to cut off all contact with her parents who were at that time paying all of her bills. Who does that? I’m sure they were overbearing, over-protective, judgmental, and driving her nuts but they were also supporting her completely and frequently bragging about her successes to the local paper. They were worried about lifestyle choices and confirmed their fears with spyware, then they freaked out further and wanted to bring her home. Yeah, that won’t work. Still, her plan to just eliminate these annoying people from her life while they continue to pick up the tab is also unrealistic isn’t it?</p>
<p>Look, this happens a lot with stage parents because controlling and perfecting the kid is what they spend years and years on and they can’t let go. It’s Gypsy. This is an extreme case but not too far from what I’ve seen before. I don’t think it has anything to do with domestic violence.</p>
<p>Also, I never said she had no prospects but it’s also true that she wouldn’t be where she is without the years of lessons they poured into her future. And I’m not defending her parents but I’m not sure she’s blameless either. She’s rebelling vary publicly.</p>
<p>I still don’t think we have the full picture- I’ll be interested, when the legal commentators weigh in. (I believe the person quoted is just an observer, not necessarily privy to more info.) So far, it seems to me that there was sufficient cause for a restraining order, sufficient interest in her for the college to do what it took to keep her. We have no way of judging the “more” here.</p>
<p>Adding: yes, good point about stage parents, as a stereotype. But, I suspect she didn’t come up with this idea for legal action all on her own- that in dealing with this, someone else, probably an adult at school, at some point and at least casually, discussed her options. (Remember, the parents dragged the school into this- or so the reports say; the school must have been forming some of their own opinions, at the same time.) I also suspect she needed some sort of legal counsel- none of the actions on her part could get this far just on a whim. Or as foot-stomping. The system took her through a process. Someone felt there was, indeed, sufficient cause.</p>
<p>Did they, in fact, “confirm their fears?” I did’t see that. Someone here mentioned suicidal posts- ? I can’t tell, from this side, what’s now speculation and what’s confirmed.</p>
<p>Actor, you’ve clearly never known anyone in abusive situations if you have to asked questions like " The report says she attempted to cut off all contact with her parents who were at that time paying all of her bills. Who does that?"</p>
<p>Money is another form of control and the abuse isn’t worth the tuition money.</p>
<p>07Dad, One is the same as yours, towntalk. It says:</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>This does NOT say Aubrey is the one who made the call. Nor does it say she filed a “police report” after the incident.</p>
<p>The Daily Mail is a British newspaper; it is just recycling the US reports. It cites the Cincinnati Enquirer story and rewrites it. It DOES give your version–that the D called–but IMO that’s just a bad rewrite. </p>
<p>The other source you cite doesn’t support the version you posted, IMO.</p>
<p>^And now, per the DM: Kenyatta Mickles, a professor of clinical law at the University of Cincinnati, said the parents were obsessed with controlling their daughter, and one way to do that was to control her internet use.</p>
<p>While other reports don’t claim she has any connection to this case.</p>
<p>The reports in, so far, are not what I’d call authoritative.</p>
<p>actor12-</p>
<p>Have you watched the movie Network (1976)? Sometimes you have to act on your own promise not to take it anymore.</p>
<p>The age of majority in Ohio and Kansas is 18. Most of the country doesn’t go to college. Most of the young people do not have their parents paying their bills after high school. They figure it out.</p>
<p>The young woman is taking care of herself. She has found a way to graduate. </p>
<p>Life is tough sometime.</p>
<p>jonri-- please post your sources as I did at your request. Especially anything that indicates someone other than Aubrey initiated the call or saw the incident and Aubrey was the one who initated the assault.</p>
<p>Here is a US report that Aubrey called the police.
<a href=“http://www.examiner.com/article/court-awards-student-aubrey-ireland-order-of-protection-against-her-own-parents[/url]”>http://www.examiner.com/article/court-awards-student-aubrey-ireland-order-of-protection-against-her-own-parents</a></p>
<p>I can no longer retrieve the story I read in the Cincinnati Enquirer.It shows up in search results, but then says “Unfortunately that page could not be found.” One was the one you posted that just says police were called to the D’s residence.</p>
<p>There was a third but now I can’t even find it on google. If I do, I’ll post it.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>That is a quote from the US source.
[Court</a> awards student Aubrey Ireland order of protection against her own parents - Atlantic City Headlines | Examiner.com](<a href=“Examiner is back - Examiner.com”>Examiner is back - Examiner.com)</p>
<p>I found the Cincinnati Enquirer article you are referencing. I does not even mention the prior assault issue.</p>
<p><a href=“Cincinnati News, Sports and Things to Do | Cincinnati Enquirer”>Cincinnati News, Sports and Things to Do | Cincinnati Enquirer;
<p>I don’t know if the parents purposely had her choose the “non-full-ride” school just to control her. I doubt that.</p>
<p>IMHO, I think the parents hadn’t thought that out. I think that when she lived at home, they had normal-to-high control over her life, knowing where she was, knowing when she went to bed, etc. She may have been the typical “model child” when she was in high school, so they felt confortable having her go far away. </p>
<p>But, once she was in college, they soon realized that she had too much freedom (or the potential for too much freedom) so they started “getting creative” (ugh) about monitoring and controlling her behavior. </p>
<p>I’m not saying that the girl is doing anything “wrong”, but she may be doing more “typical college things” than the parents ever expected her to, and so they “freaked out” and crossed the line…many, many times.</p>
<p>My wife and I decided to try those apps because we thought they would be useful. They arent. First, it tells you where the phone/laptop/etc is, not where they are. Next it doesnt tell you exactly where they are, just sort of, and its inaccurate enough that its easily dismissed. I work downtown and it often chose the bar accross the street, I think because the app was promoting thier business. It was a running joke. I thought I could use it to find my phone once, but it displayed at wall mart because that is where I accidentally shut off the GPS. We gave up on it. </p>
<p>There is no substitute for trust. All the GPS systems and video cameras in the world wont help you understand what people think. Even if they could, you still cant change it.</p>
<p>Sounds like the parents were hell-icoptering, but I bet the University wasn’t thrilled with the talk show circuit/international press. Could be that Aubrey Ireland is hoping to soon star in the new Broadway musical “Cincinnati Stalkers.”</p>