<p>I'm in my first semester of my freshman year in college. I was placed in a very nice suite in a separate, newer wing of one of the most isolated dorms on campus. Nearly everyone living around me is a sophomore or higher, and part of the honors program, and therefore very quiet. The woman at the desk describes my part of the hall as "sterile." My roommate and I get along but she is emotionless and seems to want to be nothing more than my roommate. I was friends with some of the rest of the freshman in this wing, but have recently found them to be judgmental, cruel to other students, and unaccepting of those who are different than them- often including me. I have joined several clubs, but, like my classes, students seem to just come and leave without the interest in making friends. I am usually a friendly, open-minded person (I'll admit I can be a little shy), with a wide range of artistic and musical talents and hobbies. I now have very few friends. I am not sure whether to try and transfer dorms- losing a very large, convenient suite with a girl I can generally get along with. I don't know what I'm doing wrong, and I am incredibly frustrated. This is affecting my mental health on a major level, and I frequently think of suicide, as the loneliness is crushing. I call my parents almost every waking hour.
I try to hit the gym frequently, talk to other students in my classes, and strike up conversations with people in my clubs. I have met no one, however, who seems to want to be my friend. I am worried there is something wrong with me. Please help, this is getting really bad. </p>
<p>You aren’t doing anything wrong. Freshman year is filled with challenges. Please get help for your mental health ASAP. You are not alone. Counseling can help you cope and find the friendships you seek.</p>
<p>that sounds really depressing. Try socializing, putting yourself out there. you’ll surprise urself</p>
<p>You just haven’t found your tribe yet, they are out there. Yes, perhaps a more social dorm would work better for you. In the meantime, the student health center probably has a counselor on duty or on call on the weekend. In the am, go by and see someone - the sooner the better - no need for you to suffer any longer with these uncomfortable feelings.</p>
<p>Have you joined any clubs? How about some service organizations…does your school build a Habitat house? </p>
<p>Does your rec center plan bike rides or hikes? Does your gym have spin classes or similar?</p>
<p>What is your major? have you joined the club associated with your major or career goal? </p>
<p>I found that once I was taking more classes in my major, I got to know more of my classmates since I was seeing them all the time. </p>
<p>Don’t panic, this will change. </p>
<p>I am on waiting lists for both of the counseling centers at my university- this is unfortunately a very busy time of year. I also applied to go on a social justice retreat during the spring semester. I am very fearful that I’ve chosen the wrong university- would I be happier somewhere else, somewhere smaller? Or is this all in my head?</p>
<p>It’s not all in your head. You’ll figure it out. Don’t hurt yourself in the process. You have a long future in front of you, which will include good friends. Keep trying now. You’ll find a way. Seriously. Your dean of students needs to know there’s waiting lists at both counseling centers. Very dangerous. </p>
<p>I know it must be extremely disheartning to feel alone. College is a time to explore and spread your wings so to speak. I agree with others, join a club, or do some volunteering around campus. Most colleges have all kinds of activities going on attend those and start chatting up people. You might hit it off. Keep on trying, don’t give up.</p>
<p>Do you have any friends from high school or before that live in the area or family in the area? That is why I am going to try to go to a college with at at least one person I know, or near someone I know. My advice to you is to start your own club. Pick anything that you might be interested in, and a start a club about it. This way, you can meet people and do what you like. As for the dorm situation, I would first try one more time to be friendly with you roommate. Then if it doesn’t work you should probably switch dorms. Even if you get a bad dorm mate, you at least will be in a new area with better people. Also, you might just want to make friends the easy way. Go outside and to anyone you see who looks friendly go straight up to them and say “Hi! My name is _<em>__. I’m from </em>. How are you enjoying school so far?”. I am not in college so I don’t really know, but this is what I do whenever I go somewhere new and need a friend. It works every time.</p>