Upper class parents won't pay for college?!

Paying for College
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<p>@cptofthehouse‌ Ironically enough, my top schools are in fact OOS public schools. However, my PARENTS want me to go to a private school. @chesterton I’m not asking whether I should go complain to a financial aid office. I am asking whether I should put it on my application that my parents won’t pay. When I say “won’t pay”, I don’t mean “don’t want to”. I mean they REFUSE to pay. The will not pay their EC unless I get at least half of the tuition off. It doesn’t matter the full price of the school. If somewhere as expensive as Harvey Mudd gives me half off, they would pay the rest. Or even if the school was as affordable as Slippery Rock University. They simply do not want to pay more than half. So the number varies.</p>

<p>When I said I would get good merit, I meant that id be getting maybe $2000-$3000 and that is including outside scholarships. But my problem is that because of my parents income, I will not be getting good Need based scholarships and I am wondering if I should tell a school, “hey! I’m practically an independent because my parents will only pay under 1 condition.”</p>

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<p>OP, the financial aid office DOES NOT CARE that your parent’s WON’T pay. They calculate what they calculate of what your family could afford (in their opinion), and that is that. You need to understand this basic fact. I have a kid who goes to Mudd, and am familiar with their FA office. They aren’t going to deviate from their calculation because your parents don’t want to pay. And neither is any other college FA office. You are wasting your time going down this path. The problem is that you aren’t “practically an independent” just because your parents won’t pay for your college education. The financial aid system does not work that way. At all. You won’t be getting ANY need based scholarships. Your ONLY source of scholarships will be merit. So you aren’t looking for $2,000 - $3,000 in merit. You are looking for much more than that.</p>

<p>It is interesting that they say '1/2 tuition". That is a little bit of a break, since typically room and board tack on anywhere from $8,000 - $11,000 to the cost of the pricier colleges.</p>

<p>You mention outside scholarships. Generally your time would be much better spent studying for your standardized tests and on your grades. Most scholarship money comes from the schools themselves, and a lot of it is based on stats. If you can get your test scores up, that is by far your best strategy for getting into a four year college with a half tuition scholarship.</p>

<p>One college you might look at is U-Mass-Amherst. They have lower tuition and higher fees/room/board than a lot of colleges, even for OOS students. Half of tuition there would be about $13-14K/year you would have to come up with, which is better than a lot of other schools.</p>

<p>Next time your parents bring up Northwestern, walk them through these pages. Don’t be angry with them or argue with them, just take them through in a calm discussion. </p>

<p><a href=“http://www.ugadm.northwestern.edu/financial-aid/tuition-fees-and-expenses.html”>http://www.ugadm.northwestern.edu/financial-aid/tuition-fees-and-expenses.html&lt;/a&gt; (show them that tuition alone is $46K, and heading north every year)</p>

<p><a href=“Scholarships & Grants: Undergraduate Financial Aid - Northwestern University”>http://undergradaid.northwestern.edu/types-of-aid/scholarships-grants/index.html&lt;/a&gt; (shows that they do not give any type of merit aid)</p>

<p>Then have them click on the net price calculator link on the bottom left side of the screen and go through that process. It will tell them what your family is expected to pay based on their income. There is no deviation from this just because people don’t want to pay (no one wants to pay!).</p>

<p>Then show them this:
<a href=“Northwestern University: Acceptance Rate, SAT/ACT Scores”>http://collegeapps.about.com/od/collegeprofiles/p/Northwestern_pf.htm&lt;/a&gt; (and ask them to look at the test score 50% score ranges next to your test score ranges. Even with a URM boost, you are likely well below the 25% on every score, although you haven’t given us your breakdown).</p>

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<p>Parents have different ideas about paying for college, and sometimes this is influenced by how they went to college. If they had to pay for part of theirs, they may want you to do this too. Being resentful of this won’t help. I’m sure you already know that parents have different styles of parenting. Children don’t know all the details of their parents’ finances or expenses, and retirement plans can vary as well. </p>

<p>By saying they will pay “half” of college, this still leaves the question of how much, since tuition can vary. Do they mean a specific number or the idea that you will contribute? It would help if you knew your budget, as there might be choices within that budget. You mentioned Northwestern- and the cost of attendance is roughly $63K a year. </p>

<p>Does this mean your parents are willing to contribute about $30K a year? Other posters are correct that colleges do not award need based aid for students in your situation. Need based aid is based on the parents’ income.
There are many intelligent and motivated students in your position who make choices within their cost constraints. Some choose to attend a community college and pay for 2 years of college later. Some attend state colleges and/or colleges that may not have been their dream schools initially, but have awarded them merit aid.</p>

<p>As other posters have noted, if a college awards merit, it is usually to students with top scores and grades in their application pool. Other posters here have given you some good suggestions. It’s very understandable that some of them are different from what you were thinking of, but I would add that looking into them at this time is not committing to one. It is considering possibilities. Now is not the time to close doors. The process of applying will do some of that as some colleges will accept you, some will not, and the actual financial award is sometimes unpredictable. With financial limits, it is important to have affordable college plans in place along with the applications that are possible but not completely predictable. </p>

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<p>One of my closest friends is divorced. Her Ex makes over a half million dollars, or did when her kids were applying and going to colleges. He refused to pay anything for his kids…because he did not have to do so. He was actually jubilant about it. Wouldn’t even fill out the aid forms, because he knew, and he was right, they werent’ going to get any financial aid. He made too much, had too much, and the most generous schools used CSS PROFILE and insisted on his financial numbers. Yes, they wrote letters galore, and the older of the two, an excellent student got into some nice privates–did not get a dime over the FAFSA entitlement that she got due to her mother being the custodial parent. She ended up commuting to a local state school Only affordable option to her. She was accepted to Tufts, Emory, Oberlin, BC and more. None would budge, none would give her school money despite the circumstances painstaking explained to the school about the father and all of the court fights to draw out any child support from him. Not a dime from the schools.</p>

<p>You have an intact family, and parents who just have a quirky way of deciding to do things. Not going to get an ounce of sympathy on that. There are people begging for exception all of the time. So, no, you aren’t going get financial aid. You aren’t entitled to it. Merit is the only possibility. </p>

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<p>@pennylane‌2011 Essentially, yes. If Northwestern gives me half, they will will pay the other $30000. But if a State college gives me nothing, they wouldn’t pay the $35000. Weird huh? I guess the also want to see how much the school actually wants me.</p>

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<p>@cptofthehouse‌ Yeah, i understand, I just don’t want to swarm myself with loans because I want a really good education and college experience you know? And the worst part is my grades are good enough to be above average, but I’m not outstanding. It’s one of the problems with the college system. Students spend all of high school comparing themselves to others and not seeing that their grades and achievements are actually wonderful. The only thing that really separates me from most students are my letters of recommendation, character traits, and my stellar extracurricular activities. Unfortunately, in many cases, colleges don’t care about that.</p>

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<p>@KiaraInNYC‌ </p>

<p>I just completed the admissions process so I was where you are last spring. I had a situation in complete contrast to yours as far as FA. I had to deal with the NCP waiver and that was a huge burden. My stomach was in knots for the past year over the whole process. </p>

<p>There are a few things that I would like to address about your comments.</p>

<p>Your stats may not change too much in the next few months, you MUST be mature enough to see the bigger picture. I had to add a few schools that didn’t require the CSS profile. I thought long and hard and decided to apply to an HBCU. Was it my top choice? No!! But I had done my research and spoke to a few recent Howard grads who are now in medschool & one is working on Wall Street. They absolutely loved it and are pretty successful in their current lives. They said Howard was an amazing experience and one that changed them for the better. Many students feel they are above HBCUs, but your family would be considered poor compared to many of the students who attend. Many doctors, lawyers, and other Jack & Jill/Boulet families are proud HBCU legacies. Try to look past your pomposity in this process. I committed to a college in which I said I would NEVER even tour!!! Talk about eating a large piece of humble pie!! A closed mind will close doors.</p>

<p>Had the other schools not come through admissions or FA wise, I would have had other options. Howard was one of them. I received a great merit scholarship. Having that early acceptance & merit scholarship was a huge gift.</p>

<p>Garnering merit aid is incredibly tough with your scores and GPA, you are against HBCUs & CC. You must pick the hill you are going to die on. There are no do overs in this process, especially with your stats. You must cast a wide net and get out of your own way. </p>

<p>One last point, my local CC is an extension of our local high schools. So I understand your feelings about CC. Not sure what your local CCs are like so that’s why having plenty of options now is very important.</p>

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<p>@crookshanks‌ It’s not the quality of education at HBCUs. It’s just that personally, I want to be in an environment that reflects the composition of society. </p>

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<p>You won’t be swarming with loans. YOU can’t get any on your own other than the $5500/6500/7500/7500 Direct student loans offered up to most everyone each year. Your PARENTS have to get involved for you to get loans beyond this. You arent’ going to get federal work study either. You are not eligible for finanical aid regardless of the explanations and appeals if your info is correct. Don’t know a school that are going to buy into your parents’ way of doing this. Too bad, is what they will say. AId is for those who absolutely can’t pay by their formulas, not for those who won’t for any reason, including can’t because they are stuck with bills from prior bad judgement. Too bad. </p>

<p>Yes, colleges do care about letters of recs, ECs, great essays, and you can shine in those areas. But for highly selective schools and merit money, you need to have the whole package. And grades and test scores fall into that package. But many of the top schools, NW as you mention it included, do not give ANY merit aid. You don’t cast a line where there is no fish when you need them. So NW is a waste of your time because the chances are about zero you get money from them even if you did get accepted. You need to look at schools that have big scholarships, and where you have a decent chance of getting one. That’s where the fish you need are most likely bite for you. </p>

<p>A SUNY or CUNY are good possibilities. COming up with half even if you don’t get all that much merit can be possible with the Direct loan and if you work towards the costs summers and during the school year. If you commute, most affordable.</p>

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<p>I get that…but you are also against CCs. Your parents want NW, but are unwilling to pay. You won’t be able to get loans at such a young age to cover the rest of the tuition, R&B. Do you think your parents will consign loans for that much money? Again, you MUST cast a wide net. Just like I did and my stats are much higher. My financial situation was the issue for me so I had to think about what was best for me. You don’t have the luxury of having such a closed mind. Your only other option is to raise your UW GPA to 4.0 AND get a killer SAT score. You want what you want but your stats are shaky for your financial needs. Kids with far better stats are having a tough time. Admissions is a tough game and you have to learn how to play it to your advantage. We are only trying to help. If you don’t want to listen its fine…I had to mature and listen to those around me, and so glad that I did. But you can do it your way. It’s really no skin off my back…</p>

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<p>I would say that no college is a reflection of the composition of society :smiley: (Nowhere else is a group of mainly 18-22 year olds being mostly supported by their families put together in this situation) </p>

<p>I do get your concerns though and I’ve heard other students say the same thing. I also know students who have expressed excitement about the idea of an HBCU. It’s a personal choice. Are you female? There might be some women’s colleges to consider. I’ve also heard students say they don’t want a woman’s college, and some that are happy to attend one. While just about every college has a unique culture, many are not isolated, and opportunities like internships, study abroad, university exchanges might lead to interactions with people outside the university.</p>

<p>@crookshanks has a good point though, as they could be opportunities worth looking into.</p>

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<p>OP, even if you get your test scores way up there as well as your GPA, even if you were the perfect candidate, NWU isn’t going to work under your parent’s requirements as they give ZERO merit money and they will not give you financial aid when you don’t need it by their def. They aren’t going to give you a half priced deal. They have kids with a lot more hardships and issues than you that they won’t bend for. Just because your parents have this idea in their heads, doesn’t mean the schools are going to play ball with them They have their rules and policies. Heck, I’ll join your parents’ requirements if that will get the colleges to reduce their prices for my kids to half. Just about everyone would. That’s why there are consistent rules as to how fin aid is calculated.</p>

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<p>Hey guys. We should stop on this. It is a discussion going nowhere. It is pretty much a trolling thread. It has nothing to do with reality.</p>

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<p>@‌2018dad
<<<
IMO 5 percenters are not upper class. Upper 1%, yes.</p>

<p>We’re in that income bracket, so I know what it feels to be in that donut hole for college FA.
<<<<</p>

<p>well, you cant have the lower class be the bottom 1%, have the upper class in the top 1%, and then everyone in between be middle class or upper-middle. lol…that would make the middle far too big…and the bottom 4-5% are not middle class.</p>

<p>Just because those who earn $220k have trouble paying for pricey colleges does not exclude them from the upper class.</p>

<p>While I would agree that $220k is not rich, because you still have to work for your money unless that $220k is all income from investments, the ability to pay or not pay for pricey colleges is not the benchmark for being in the upper class.</p>

<p>Now, unless you just started earning that much, then likely you have other healthy assets as well…home, 401ks, investments, etc. </p>

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<p>I too had to consider a women’s college…I was against it from freshman year. But I was smart enough to at least consider it. I went to an open house in April of junior year. Spent a whole day taking it all in. It was an amazing school, but not for me, at least I tried! Good thing I had a positive admissions experience. I must admit, there were days, after I submitted all of my apps, that I questioned my decision not to apply. I’m so glad everything worked out, or I would have been really kicking myself.</p>

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<p>@billcsho‌ what is a trolling thread? Sorry, I’m still learning the CC language.</p>

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<p>Crookshanks, a bright, talented young woman we know is flourishing at Wellesley. She wasn’t interested in it at all, nor to any women’s college, but she’s legacy there, and it turned out to be her best choice. She’s really glad she picked it now. So it can go either way.</p>

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<p>It doesnt matter to schools. If it did, then all parents would say that they’ll only pay under 1 condition. no, you are not practically an independent. not even close.</p>

<p>You really need to have some third parties educate your parents. Have them open a college confidential acct and post their thoughts and questions. They may think you have the stats for NU. They may think NU gives merit awards to students like you. </p>

<p>Your parents may think the schools will make exceptions because you are AA. Well, I can tell you this…I have a home in an affluent subdivision that is about 25% AA. The parents are doctors, business owners and army generals. Their kids arent as hooked for being AA because they are privileged and go to the best schools (public and private). The story above about the 1700 student who got into S detailed that he was hooked because he excelled the best he could in an underprivileged environment. S recognized that by putting him in a new environment with all the options, he could soar.</p>

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<p>Yes! I agree. That’s why I visited Smith last year. I wanted to give it a try & see what the hype was all about. In the end, I could not appreciate the single sex aspect. I was told that if I wasn’t admitted to my top schools, I might have a better shot at admission at Smith. My mom says something like" cutting your nose off to spite your face". I have been on this site for awhile now, and always fascinated by the kids who look for advice and don’t want to listen. I can’t figure that out. Then why ask?</p>

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<p>If your parents wont make a CC account, then maybe you could make a new thread and ask the questions that they would (should) have so that we can provide the answers…and then you could show them the answers.</p>

<p>The title could be something like: Where can a student with a 1700 SAT and a 3.5/4.0 get accepted with a half-ride?</p>

<p>Then in the body of the post, ask the pertinent questions. </p>

<p>you need to mention the high income and the goal to only pay half no matter where the student goes – public or private. </p>

<p>You can include a mention that the student is studying for the SAT and hopes to get around a 2000 (which would be an amazing jump…more likely the improvement would be a 100–150 pts).</p>

<p>(Part of me doubts that these parents would pay half of any private. There are some lesser-known, but good privates that might give her a half-ride with a 1900 SAT…would the parents still pay half?? )</p>