URGENT! Looking for feedback on my commonapp essay!

<p>I'm planning on submitting all of my applications in the next 2 days or so, and I need some last minute feedback on my commonapp essay. I want this to be as close to perfect as possible, so I'm looking for feedback from parents and adults instead of clueless high schoolers. If anyone's interested in reading it, post below or PM me and I'll PM it to you. Thanks in advance!</p>

<p>Feel free to PM me; I’ll try to get back to you as soon as possible.</p>