I’m responding to the 1st common app essay prompt, and I wanted to write about how much my spanish class has influenced and changed me over the year. But I was thinking about doing it in a somewhat unusual format…this is the first sentence:
“You sit in a swirl of confusion- everyone around you is speaking yet you have no idea what they’re saying”
Then, in the 1st paragraph, I continued to elaborate on how everyone at my table was a native spanish speaker and how I dreaded the class. Then, I said, in italics, “Four months later”, and continued with another paragraph about the class. I wanted to continue to have paragraphs like this, separated with “# months later”, leading up to “ten months later”, where I have an anecdote that shows how much I’ve grown over the year. With each paragraph, I wanted to show the progression of my passion and love for the language, and how it’s influenced me to study spanish and be a spanish teacher in the future. And I’m doing it all in second person “you”.
So anyways, do you think this is too risky/ weird? I personally thought that it would be a unique and creative way to demonstrate, rather than tell, how much the class as affected me.
Thanks so much, your thoughts are MUCH appreciated!
I like some parts of your idea. I really like the first sentence. But I’m a little confused about why your whole essay has to be in second person. First person has the benefit of letting the reader know that this is your story; you don’t tell someone a story about yourself using second person. Making your essay a compilation of anecdotes is still pretty creative compared to the continuous narrative that most people do. And I like the time markers, as long as you can do it in a way that doesn’t mess up the flow of your essay.
Thanks so much for the advice: that makes alot of sense why I should write in first person. Do you think at the end I should end the anecdotes with a “expository” paragraph (like a summary/ the meaning behind it all)?
I wouldn’t advise against second person, as it is somewhat peculiar (perhaps a good thing). I would suggest trying both ways and seeing which you like better.
Also, I probably would do something that ties everything together similar to an expository paragraph. However, you need to make sure it is clear that you simply wish to have a fitting conclusion, that it flows naturally, and that you are not underestimating the intellect of your reader. Perhaps try both and see which is better. I would, if possible, include one tho, given the criteria mentioned above
Thanks so much! I switched it all to first person, and I think I like it better!