<p>If You Have Any Lame But Funny Jokes, Please Share.</p>
<p>Why Don't You Ever Shower With A Pokemon???
-Because It'll Pikachu!!! (Peek At You)</p>
<p>A snare drum and a cymbal fall out of a tree.</p>
<p><em>ba-dum ching</em></p>
<p>What's brown and sticky?
A STICK!</p>
<p>There was once this asian guy who needed a job. So he applied to Office Max. It turns out though, that he is utterly incompetent in holding down a job. Exasperated, the manager throws up his arms and says, "Just go work with the supplies." The asian guy thinks for a minute and says ok. THe next day, as the manager is strolling into the store, an asian guy jumps from behind the counter and yells "Supplies! Supplies!"</p>
<p>Supply=surprise. get it? hehehe, ok. bye</p>
<p>P-U</p>
<p>Q: What does the H in Jesus H. Christ stand for?</p>
<p>A: Haploid.</p>
<p>So Heisenberg is blazing down the highway, top down on his convertible, when he sees flashing lights; a cop is pulling him over. The officer gets out, walks over, and leans toward Heisenberg's window.
"Do you have any idea how fast you were going, sir?"
"No," says Heisenberg, "but I can tell you where I am."</p>
<p>Two sodium atoms are walking down the street.
Suddenly, one turns to the other and says, 'Oh, ****, I think I lost an electron!'
The second one says 'Are you sure?'
'Yes, I'm positive!'</p>
<p>And some more 6 yr old jokes</p>
<p>a) How do you attract a squirrel?
b) climb up a tree and act like a nut!</p>
<p>a)Why did the elephant paint her toe-nails red? To hide in cherry trees! Have you ever seen an elephant in a cheery tree? See, it works!</p>
<p>a)what do you call cheese that isn't yours?
b) Nacho cheese!</p>
<p>a)why did the chicken cross the road? To get the newspaper! Get it? Get it? No, I get the funnies!</p>
<p>What's NEW (nu) ?!</p>
<p>C over lambda.</p>
<p>=/</p>
<p>Did you hear the trash joke........never mind its garbage,you wanted lame and i gave it to you</p>
<p>I got a few jokes...</p>
<p>A skeleton walked into a bar. "What'll it be?", asked the bartender. "I'll have a beer and a mop," said the skeleton.</p>
<p>Two astronauts are on the moon. One says to the other "Its nice here isn't it?". The other replies, "Yes, have you got any crisps ?" </p>
<p>There are three kinds of accountants. Those who can count . . . and those who can't. </p>
<p>What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
"Hey, where's my tractor?"</p>
<p>Two birds are sitting on a perch
One says to the other, "do you smell fish?"</p>
<p>Two fish are in a tank
One says to the other, "do you know how to drive this thing?"</p>
<p>Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
Because if it had four doors it would be a chicken sedan</p>
<p>Two cows were standing in a field.
One cow said, "Moo".
The other cow said, "Hey . . . I was going to say that."</p>
<p>there are 10 types of ppl in the world..those who understand binary, and those who dont</p>
<p>Which type of bear dissolves the most easily in water?</p>
<p>Polar!</p>
<p>how do you fit 20 pikachus in a car?
-you POKEMON (poke 'em on)</p>
<p>What goes in long and hard and comes out soft and sticky?
-Chewing Gum!</p>
<p>What do you call a hooker with no legs?
-A legless hooker!</p>
<p>What goes clip clop BANG clip clop BANG clip clop BANG?</p>
<p>An amish drive by shooting</p>
<p>what do you call a chicken without a head?
-a headless chicken.</p>
<p>how do you make a clown stop laughing?</p>
<p>hit it in the face with an axe.</p>
<p>Why dont cannibals eat clowns? </p>
<p>Because they taste funny. /rimshot</p>
<p>Ok, so two guys are sitting at a nudist colony and one is reading a book on socialism. The other guy says, "Oh, have you read Marx, too?" The other guy replies, "yes but i think its from these wicker chairs"</p>
<p>a woman is dying in a hospital and she sees god. she asks “will i get better?” god tells her you have 40 more years to live. the woman gets all happy and she gets better. before leaving the hospital she gets breast implants and butt fix to celebrate, she goes to the salon and does her hair and nails, gets new clothes, etc. She’s crossing the street when a car comes by and runs her over. When she gets to heaven she asks god, “you said i had forty more years to live!” god shrugged and said, “i didn’t recognize you.”</p>
<p>What do you call two crows on a branch?
Attempted murder.</p>
<p>What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?
An investigator.</p>
<p>What do you call three holes in the ground?
Well, well, well.</p>
<p>(The next one only works when spoken.)</p>
<p>What’s the difference between a ladder and a hammer?
You can’t climb the latter.</p>
<p>A physicist, a biologist and a mathematician are sitting in a street café watching people entering and leaving the house on the other side of the street. First they see two people entering the house. Time passes. After a while they notice three people leaving the house.</p>
<p>The physicist says, “The measurement wasn’t accurate.” The biologist says, “They must have reproduced.” The mathematician says, “If one more person enters the house then it will be empty.”</p>