Visit now or later?

<p>Something else to keep in mind MrsP is how much contact your son has already had with colleges. If he has older siblings or has been to "events" on college campuses, he may need very few visits prior to applying. They can get burned out pretty fast with visiting, and that is when they dismiss colleges without a real evaluation - the "won't even get out of the car" syndrome ;). Sometimes it can be a balancing act to nurture the interest without overwhelming them. There are some other great threads about visits - you can read about the whole gamut of reactions that kids have to different schools - it says a lot about the process.</p>

<p><<sometimes it="" can="" be="" a="" balancing="" act="" to="" nurture="" the="" interest="" without="" overwhelming="" them="">></sometimes></p>

<p>Truer words were never spoken. I have been guilty of being a complete klutz in this "balancing test". But even after all my mis-steps, I'm happy to say that the message does tend to seep through. </p>

<p>As to the original question, we've found that a few visits to a wide range of schools was most effective and helped narrow the field (public v. private, small v. large, urban v. rural v. suburban, etc.) . Also, bear in mind that some kids react completely differently to the "type" of visit -- it was clear early on that my son loathed the "Open House" weekend events and would much rather just arrange a weekday visit through the admissions office.</p>

<p>Quick notes on visiting, some of which may not apply to the OP:</p>

<p>We visited during Spring breaks; much better to see a school with students around then during vacations. We saw Georgetown under both conditions and the difference was amazing.</p>

<p>Start early and build up. We saw one college in 9th grade, five in 10th grade, seven in 11th grade, plus a couple of quick "solo" visits worked in to closer places.</p>

<p>Visiting before applying can have major payoffs. The school that was #1 on D's list before visiting dropped off completely. Otoh, womens colleges went from zero to three apps. (Your mileage on issues may vary, it's the concept, not the specifics that are important.)</p>

<p>Definitely visit a variety, big/small, near/far, etc. All of us were inclined towards research universities before visiting. Not only are TheMom and I graduates of research U's, she has worked at UCLA for more than a quarter century. All of us are now big fans of LAC's for many, but not all, students.</p>

<p>I know a psychologist who believed in waiting until the acceptances came in before scheduling a campus tour. He felt there was no need to have the emotinal angst of being turned down by a dream school. That said, I have never seen someone as conflicted as my daughter was this past April when her 1st choice of college rejected her. She just couldn't pick a solid #2 from the remaining 6 that she did get into. And it seemed like too much pressure to make that decision in a month.</p>

<p>My advice is to take a clue from your child. If he/she is clueless about where to start, then pick a sampling of public,private, large, small, rural and urban. That should instigate a response and lead to a direction of where to apply. We never visited our safety schools because we felt they were only a last resort.</p>

<p>When our family was new at all this (and having a daughter who was dragging her feet), we didn't visit ANY schools until the beginning of her senior year (9 schools in about 3 weeks - oy!). Fortunately, they were all within driving distance, which kept the costs down. She re-visited her top two in the spring before making her decision.</p>

<p>With our son, we visited a total of 7 schools, starting the spring of his junior year. We had already done a lot of research on what he thought he'd want in a school and did a lot of research on what each school offered and what made each school unique. We also "visited" the schools with the DVD's many schools provide and "toured" the campuses via the schools' websites. I don't think that the actual campus visits made as huge an impression on him as did the information he had already gathered. </p>

<p>The question we asked him after every visit was, "Could you see yourself at this school? Why or why not?" (What's funny is that he could see himself at all the schools we visited!). I don't think he actually "fell in love" with any one particular place and he ended up applying to all seven schools.</p>

<p>Perhaps our son is just very laid-back, but his comment upon visiting was, "After a while, building are just buildings, food is just food, and opportunities are what you make them to be. This is only a four-year commitment, not a life-time sentence, and I can always transfer if things don't work out."</p>

<p>For our family, the relationship with the potential schools grew over months of communication, research, and networking with those who had had experience with the schools in question. Like a courtship, it took time. By the end of April, having sifted through everything, our son was able to make a reasoned decision which he was comfortable with. </p>

<p>Sometimes I think that students can be prone to a "love at first sight" experience when they visit campuses, which can overshadow the steps needed to make an informed decision involving both the heart AND head.
Another danger is believing that there is one "dream school" where everything will be a perfect fit for the student. There are MANY schools which can meet your student's needs and expectations - but remember that no school is perfect in every way. </p>

<p>'Nuff said!</p>

<p>My son has been to one school with a friend and he hated it. He couldn't even say why. It's a good school but he won't put it on his list. Maybe it is best to wait until they have some idea if they will like a school before visiting. </p>

<p>snajean, did your daughter visit any of the remaining schools before she was accepted? I am also worried about having one dream school. I've already told my son that there are many good schools on his list and he can add others if he wants to. Even if a school seems like a match, there are no guarantees, so he needs to keep an open mind about all of them. My friend's senior applied to 13 schools, was rejected by 8, and only got into one safety school that was acceptable. None of the safeties was a real option, but they never thought it possible to be turned away from all 8 first choices. That left only one option. That would be the worst scenario I can imagine. I wouldn't want any safeties to be something so unacceptable my son wouldn't want to go to any of them.</p>

<p>MrsP, negative information is useful. Visits aren't to confirm that one likes a school, at least until the end of the process. Visits are to explore criteria and issues, check the "on paper" vs. "in reality" factors, etc. Finding that one doesn't like a school is useful information. Finding out <em>why</em> one doesn't like a school is even more useful.</p>

<p>As for Safeties, one doesn't have to actually love them, but one should be willing to actually attend them with a good attitude. Otherwise, they're phantoms on the list.</p>

<p>Unless you have 20 schools close to home you might find it difficult to fit in 20 college visits, I visited my top 5 my junior year.</p>

<p>Many of the 20 are Cal States, some in the area, some not. He won't need to visit all of them, so my first question wasn't accurate. I would say maybe 8 need a visit.</p>

<p>TheDad, that is a good point about the safeties, although it's now harder to get into the match schools on his list, so it seems having more safeties would be a good idea, wouldn't it?</p>

<p>I did ask just now to find out what he didn't like about the school he saw. The students he met seemed unacademic and more like partygoers. I talked to a woman yesterday whose son attends that school and what she told me matches what he said. It has a good reputation but didn't measure up on the visit.</p>

<p>The safety schools on his list are easier schools to get into, which means they aren't going to attract the academic types of students he will be most comfortable with at school. So wouldn't that make none of them a good choice? Even with a preliminary study by reading websites, I noticed that the schools that would be a match or a reach are a much better fit for him than any one of the safeties.</p>

<p>MrsP, I know what you mean about finding a good safety. D did not want a party school either, wanting the most challenging academics, etc. </p>

<p>Looking for a Safety reminds me of picking over the fruit in a supermarket on Saturday night, looking for specimens that aren't <em>too</em> bad. When D got a "likely" letter from one of the schools she applied to, the second thing she said was "Oh, good, I don't have to go to <name of="" safety="">." I think that was more of a plus for her than the rejections from HYS were negatives.</name></p>

<p>We were told that one of her Match schools on her list was really more like a Safety. We didn't believe it...this board makes you justifiably paranoid. Ironically, this is the school she's attending.</p>

<p>I don't think you can ever tell for sure if a school is a Match or a Safety, unless you are far above the averages. After talking to people who have seniors who did not get into any of their Match schools this year, I'm worried. Although it's possible they misjudged what was a Match and put Reach schools into that category. I have found 4 very good Matches for my son, which may be the best he can do. The rest are either Matches in terms of getting in but not 100% of what he wants or else they are Safeties and not academically rigorous. He's only got a few reaches, as I don't see the point. One is more of a Match but he's on the lower end of the average, and the other is so far out of reach it doesn't seem to make much sense. But that is one his counselor suggested to kids with his stats.</p>

<p>Logistics can, unfortunately, dictate a lot of the scheduling, but I would vote for visiting before April of senior year. Visiting in the fall is probably preferable to the summer, because students will be present, but, if you go on a weekend, tours may be more crowded.</p>

<p>I can relate to MrsP's comments. Our HS Jr son is not interested in schools with big frat/party reputations, and likes a more academic atmosphere -- not always easy to find in our "safer" category. It's a bit off the original topic, but what is the best way to start looking for such schools -- websites, college guides? We may try to fit in another weekend of visits in early fall, after college kids go back, but before our school year begins in earnest.</p>

<p>Talk to people and read about the schools here. I have only been a member here for a week and have found information about many schools. Students enrolled will be able to tell you if a school is more studious, more of a party school.</p>

<p>For whatever reason, no recent graduates from our HS have gotten in or attended the several schools S is most intersested in, so we have been going by college guides, school websites, and CC. The school that looked like the best fit for him on paper also happens to be his favorite by far after two visits. May be a bit of a reach, though.</p>

<p>Take it from a senior that will be graduating high school in a week- Visit now!! Visit as many colleges as you can, even before and during applying. A cool thing happened to me. I applied to a college that i was pretty sure i wanted to go to. After sending in my app and all that stuff i visited the campus and fell in love with it. As soon as i got home i checked the mail and my acceptance letter was waiting for me!! Isn't that the biggest coincidence!</p>

<p>That was good timing--congrats! We are following the advice we got here. My son just made some appointments via email.</p>