Last year at this time, I began thinking about when I would visit home during the fall semester. I planned a few visits because it was my first year away from home, and I knew I would be somewhat homesick.
Now, going into my second year away (and also my senior and final year), I somewhat don’t want to visit home except for fall break (Thanksgiving). Is it weird not to go home for just a weekend? I really want to soak in this last year of school, and I’m not as eager to come home as I was during my first year away. My school is 2 & 1/2 hours away, and leaving on a Friday and returning on a Sunday seems pretty pointless because Saturday is really the only day I’m “home.” I feel bad that I don’t want to visit home (feel like I make my parents feel bad), but I also like my “home away from home.”
Don’t worry, it means you’re settled in and doing great! There are so many people who post here that they’re beyond homesick and want to return home every weekend. I never went home “just because” - only if there was a family event or religious holiday. Even though your parents might miss you, I think they’d be happy to know that you’re happy there.
I doubt that it is unusual at all for students to only go home for major breaks. So many students go to school far away from home and can’t. My own daughter, a rising junior, has not been home since Christmas break. Her father and I miss her but we don’t feel “bad.” What you are feeling is positive, you are growing up and making your own way. Your parents know this. Unlike my daughter who goes to school over 7000 miles away from where we live right now, you have the opportunity to go home if you want to or need to for some reason. It’s not black or white, all or nothing. And it is okay if you don’t go home until Thanksgiving or even Christmas break.
It is great you are enjoying college life and it is fine (and perfectly normal) to just go home over school breaks. You can let your parents know in advance that you will be taking harder, more time consuming classes and are more involved in campus activities so you likely won’t be home other than school vacations. If your school has a fall break in Oct. you may think about going home then if your parents are upset or perhaps invite them to come to campus and meet you for lunch one Saturday or Sunday.
My daughter goes to school about 60 miles from home and almost never comes home (maybe once last fall in addition to Thanksgiving? - her freshman year). She’s way too busy on campus; and while we miss her, we’d rather know that she’s so well entrenched in college life that she doesn’t have time (or dare I say, interest) in coming home during the semester.
Don’t feel bad about not going home. As a parent, we are happy to see our kids enjoying where they are and making the most of this time. Now, I am sure your parents would appreciate a text message or a call every now and then so check in a let them know you are doing well. I would much rather be sent a selfie from my son having a great time at school than for him to drive home out of a feeling of obligation.