As I said, my circumstances have changed dramatically recently in a very stressful way, while all of this college stuff is going on at the same time. I realize that’s not an excuse for my not comprehending the ins and outs of financial aid, merit aid, no merit aid for waitlist candidates, etc, but my situation is what it is. When the letter was written, I did not realize that the words “if admitted, I would accept” essentially was a 100% commitment (though not exactly legally binding yet) with no real opportunity to consider all of the factors (namely, financial considerations)…though I now understand the full consequences of it all. Again, I’m not trying to make excuses, but it is what it is.
An acceptance off the waitlist is NOT binding…under any circumstances.
But the high school,GC did advocate for this student to get off the wait,it’s, saying she would attend if accepted. And yes…this could affect how Colby deals with WL students from this HS in the future.
I don’t think anyone will hold it against the student, the GC, future applicants of the school if the student has to turn down the acceptance because of changed circumstances. You just politely tell the school, “We’re sorry but our situation has changed and D can no longer afford to attend without financial aid.”
The OP’s circumstances didn’t change from the time the letter was written, though – they changed from year end when applications were due. By the time the letter was written, the OP knew – just didn’t realize what they were agreeing to with the letter wording. Colleges DO have relationships with GCs, and this type of behavior does hurt the GC’s credibility. But you can’t do what you can’t afford. So turn it down.
Some things don’t make sense. The DD is thinking of transferring to get into one of her top choices, but now mom is saying that they need aid. Transfer students tend to get lousy aid, so this student needs to attend one of her merit schools for all 4 years.
The decision is absolutely yours to make. If your kiddo can’t attend Colby without aid, then you simply thank them, but say finances have changed and you can’t accept their offer of acceptance.
Both Lafayette and Kenyon are great schools. I don’t know which one she committed to…but either one is a great choice.
Plus, with a merit award, you don’t have to consider changing finances in years to come.
Just for anyone reading, this is not universally true. My S12 was offered money off a WL accept and @Lindagaf 's D was just offered some from a WL school also. Sometimes they have merit left over from kids they offered it to who didn’t accept, or they use it to entice WL kids just as they use it to entice RD kids. It’s perhaps not common, but not a hard and fast rule at all.
Some WL kids do get merit…but not at schools like Colby…where no merit aid is offered.
Okay, then you say "We really thought we could make it work financially, but we just can’t. " She definitely won’t be the only student in American unable to come up with the money and having to go where there is money being offered.
Yes, it is true. My D just got off WL at a very well known LAC and was offered merit. I susupect she must have been very close to being admitted RD.