Want Critiques for my Yale supplement essay!

<p>Please have a look at my Yale supplement essay.
It's 536 words long, so i need to cut it down a bit.
I would really appreciate thoughtful comments, harsh criticisms. TORE DOWN MY ESSAY PLEASE! PM me or comment and I will send you my essay.</p>

<p>PM it to me! editing is a lot easier on google docs bc you can strikeout and stuff - just an idea</p>

<p>I’ll look over it</p>

<p>sent to both of you guys!</p>

<p>I’ll take a look! But, really, a little over 500 won’t hurt at all; don’t force brevity if it’s going to sacrifice your entire essay. Feel free to PM whenever!</p>

<p>I’ll be willing to.</p>

<p>I’d be willing to read it as well. PM me. :)</p>

<p>Sure, I’ll take a look at it. I’ve been editting my brother’s essays since October. Lol.</p>

<p>Hey PM me.~</p>

<p>I’ll take a look dhoick!</p>

<p>Send it over!</p>

<p>Sure! Message it to me?</p>

<p>I could help, if you want :)</p>

<p>If anyone’s up for it, I would also like for my essay to be looked at.</p>

<p>send it over if you’d like</p>

<p>Mind if I take a look? I’m curious to see Yale’s topics.</p>

<p>In Yale’s FAQs on their website they say that it’s okay if you’re slightly over but they’d like you to respect the word limit. In other words (I think) they don’t care if you’re a sentence or two over, but they do if you’re a whole paragraph over.</p>