My daughter’s AP Bio teacher has received so many university mugs over the years that he’s created a coffee mug tree in his classroom. He’s got a Keurig just for AP students and they’re allowed to use any of the mugs and have coffee or hot chocolate as long as they wash the mug after.
My daughter looked forward to that her entire HS career.
That being said, a truly thoughtful, personal note of more than 3 sentences is probably the most appreciated gift of all. Tuck a generic gift card in with it and you’re golden.
I’m married to a teacher as well. He has more Starbucks gift cards than he will ever use. His favorite thing is a handwritten note (or email / text) from the student. It is not necessary to spend a dime!
Both my Ds wrote teachers and GC personal notes and attached a small bag of homemade cookies. Also, GC like to line her office with pennants from colleges her students commit to, so in our case, both my kids were the first to attend their respective schools so they gave her small felt pennants of their schools.
I also wrote the GC a personal note thanking her for all her help during admission time.
D’s recommendation letter came from her English teacher, who also happened teach freshmen Reading. D had noticed that her classroom library was short on several more recent YA book series, so she visited a used bookstore and library book sale, and was able to put together a couple of these series. She of course included a handwritten thank-you letter, but since they shared a love of reading, this was the perfect way to thank her.
S baked homemade cookies - he is a much better baker than D.
I made trays of cookies, brownies, and Oreo truffles for both the calc teacher who did the rec and his guidance counselor (addressed to the individual and whole office) after all apps were complete, sent them in with S (who cannot bake at all) on Monday. I figured the GC office had probably been pretty stressed or worn out dealing with the kids and were probably not acknowledged often.
Slightly different context, but as university faculty I write probably 10-12 LoRs for my students every year. Gifts are neither necessary nor expected; I’m just doing my job. And most students don’t give gifts. Some send hand-written thank-yous, which is nice, but a thoughtful and appreciative e-mail does just as well. When I do get the occasional gift that has monetary value, I actually feel a bit awkward about it. I know the gift can’t influence the content of my LoR which is already written and submitted by the time the gift is made, but the gift makes the whole transaction feel like a quid pro quo, and that feels a little smarmy to me. But I don’t return the gifts as that would seem rude. So I end up with some stuff, some of which I don’t particularly want or need, and it ends up sitting around in a storage room in our basement, destined to be thrown out when we eventually clean up to sell the house and downsize. Other letter-writers may feel differently, but I say hold the gifts. Thank you notes, whether hand-written or electronic, are thanks enough, and they don’t end up as household clutter. Or if you really want to express your appreciation, send the thank-you now and resolve to check back in from time to time (e-mail will suffice) to update that teacher on your progress in your studies, your life, and your career, and thank them again for helping you get started on the right foot. Nothing makes an old teacher’s day as much as that. It’s validation that their life’s work has not been in vain.
I like handwritten notes (emails are fine) and updates about where my students go.
I do NOT like giftcards. They are almost always for places I will never go (I’m looking at you, Starbucks) and are almost always coffee-related (I don’t drink coffee… or tea). I’ve also gotten more than my fair share of cookies (almost always chocolate chip and I’m allergic to chocolate).
Just go the safe route with a heartfelt thank you. Best presents I ever get
Hmm, the quid pro quo didn’t even occur to me – the recommendation from the teacher is worth SO much more than a $20 gift card to Barnes & Noble. Good to know the other side of it. And I know if I were a teacher I definitely wouldn’t want tchotchkes.
Love the idea of checking back in from time to time. My daughter still checks in via email with a teacher from 5th grade, and I know it means a lot to them both.
A middle school teacher went out of her way to write a very good recommendation letter to a selective private high school. Whether or not it turned the decision, DS was accepted, and DS sent a nice note.
The following year (when no ethical issues existed), I sent an Amazon gift card with a “status report” on how DS was doing. I periodically sent emails that thanked her again, the last one when he matriculated at Yale. As I explained in one of the notes, a middle school teacher’s noticing him and recommending him might have changed his life. “For want of a nail, the shoe was lost. For want of a shoe…”
