<p>I was accepted to a a school comparable to gtown early action and my friend decided to apply regular decision. It's been his dream school all year, and he talked about it all year as though he were already in. He knew I was accepted. </p>
<p>Now, he was waitlisted and he's really upset and even angry. He keeps comparing himself to me and saying, how was it that you were accepted and I wasn't? He's definitely jealous, upset, and hearbroken because all year everyone has been telling him he'd definitly get in. Though I knew this was a dangerous way of thinking, I didn't want to say anything. </p>
<p>How do I deal with this? My friend wrote his essays last minute and got really apathetic towards the end whereas I worked hard on my application. I've worked hard all four years of high school, and gotten some national awards, but my friend seems to have forgotten all this. It's not like I'd ever point out all these things because we're best friends, but he's so angry and jealous. I feel scared because when people are jealous of you, bad things happen (evil eye and what not). I don't know how to diffuse this jealousy and make him feel better, because in the end, I was accepted and he was waitlisted.</p>
<p>I hate to say it but he will always resent that you got in and he waitlisted. Males are so competitive. The friendship can possibly be repaired IF he eventually gets into the school that both of you covet, but if he gets rejected, he will never forgive you. It will always eat at his psyche that you got in and he did not. He is angry at the school/ himself but is taking it out on you. You cannot rationalize with him at this point. Wait until the acceptances/rejections are over before you even try to go back to normal.Take the cues from him to resume your friendship.
Sux for you-you can’t even be happy for yourself and your accomplishment.
Congrats from a complete stranger.</p>
<p>Pssh, tell your friend to **** off. He reminds me of these tards in my schools who thought they were “DA SHIIT” before they got their rejections from prestigious colleges. Maybe now they realize how insignificant GPA is in college admissions. Most weight goes towards SAT, race and essays.</p>
<p>Oh, and he isn’t “your friend”. A true friend would be show happiness to you. He would feel proud that his best fried got in. Doesn’t seem like someone I would hang around with.</p>
<p>yeah, I don’t even know what to do. I know I should stay away from him, but he called me today practically crying. I didn’t know what to say to him. Should I remain distant from him from now on? We’re best friends, I can’t desert him now…</p>
<p>(ps. okay, we’re actually both girls, I was just trying to keep it anonymous from her, but it might make a difference in how I should respond)</p>
<p>Girls can hold grudges, but we’re better at holding them against people we don’t know very well. You still need to give her space, but in a few weeks, show up to school with a muffin and a coffee for her, and ask to talk after school. You should be able to work this out, whether it’s in a few weeks or when she finally falls in love with whatever school she ends up at, but you need to give her some room so she can be mad at you. She needs to be, at least for now.</p>
<p>How about going to georgetown and keep **<strong><em>ing about how *</em></strong>ty it is with your friend whenever you two are talking? I don’t mean little **<strong><em>ing. I mean hard-core </em></strong><em>ing.
It’d make her feel better. It sounds sad and pessimistic, but the truth is that we feel better when others (including our “friends”) get </em> thrown at them. It reminds us that those who we think are better than ourselves still have as much **** as we do.</p>
<p>^^^ Someones being a bit moody. “Don’t think that your friendship can last for long”. And how can you testify this, DiDIMakeAMistake? Doesn’t seem like you would have any good friends with that attitude.</p>
<p>@adam274. Tell your friend how the college you go to doesnt determine your life. Maybe tell her that she can be as successful as anyone else depending on how hard she works. And if its still a problem, give her some hope about transferring.</p>
<p>Personal observations. Don’t try to deny that girls aren’t more *****y and selfish than guys. This thread further proves that what I’m saying is true.
And your answer to adam’s post is pretty overused. I don’t think her “friend” is that stupid to fall for it. What her “friend” needs to hear is constant 24/7 biitching that georgetown sucks. It’s the only way.</p>
<p>Not really, people have actually been either ignoring you or disagreeing with you. why are yous so negative? try being more positive and try to make some friends rather than trying to make people who you dont even know feel bad.</p>
<p>Try to separate these two events. Just because you’re dealing with the same colleges, do not compare yourselves. Different times (EA/RD), different applications. </p>
<p>You: Wow…I can’t believe I got in. I’m thrilled! </p>
<p>Her: What were they thinking? They really made a mistake. Let’s get psyched up to hear from ____________ .</p>
<p>I’m speaking the truth. Your bull **** tactics don’t work in the real world. If <em>you</em> had any friends, you would have known that the “Oh, specific colleges don’t determine success” excuse doesn’t work. Or, it could be that no one in your school is really competitive. If so, I wouldn’t be surprised.</p>
<p>Except when I told him to apply early action, he said that he wasn’t going to have his stuff together in time. EA acceptance was 30%, RD–10%. I don’t want to harp now about what he should have done.</p>
<p>He’s even diminishing my accomplishments now, saying none of my accomplishments even mean anything.</p>
<p>And I remember back when I studied for my SAT/worked on my college essays, he persistently told me that it wasn’t that important. </p>
<p>I’m trying to comfort him for being wailisted, saying that many qualifed people are waitlisted, that adcoms say that if they were to choose people all over again, they would choose a whole different group of people because there are so many applicants, that the school has a pretty bad yield so they go through their waitlist pretty fast, etc.</p>
<p>But he just said, “but the school’s still saying, sorry, you’re not good enough. Maybe if the people who are good enough don’t come, then you can come”. And he kept saying, but you were accepted, forgettting that we’re different people. </p>
<p>And I know if I say the whole college doesn’t determine success, he’ll just say that it’s easy enough for me to say after having gotten in.</p>
<p>FINALLY! Someone other than me had the balls to say that the girl might not be a true friend.
Why are we so desperate the hang onto our pseudo-friends even though we know they aren’t our true friends? Just let him/her go.</p>
<p>Which is very sad because he’s been a really good and supportive friend in all areas except this one college. </p>
<p>I guess, I can understand grieving, shame (after telling everyone that was where he was going), but it’s hard to cope with this anger, resentment, and bitterness.</p>
<p>Here’s another life lesson for you.
A “friend” can easily support his “friend” when the situation doesn’t involve one friend winning and the other friend losing. But a true friend supports his friend even when he ends up losing while his friend ends up winning.
Now you know your friend’s true colors. Don’t listen to these people in CC. They obviously don’t have real friends. They seems pretty inexperienced. They either love to give out bull **** answers to try to make you suffer or they just give out bs answers because they really don’t know any better. If you friend doesn’t stop *****ing, there’s no point in having a relationship with her.</p>
<p>^sigh, that’s really hard to accept, but maybe it’s true.</p>
<p>Gosh, new england private high schools can be so competitive sometimes. Everyone has to apply all the same colleges, which just sets people up for these types of situations.</p>