<p>Any applicant who is reasonably qualified gets their application put on a large wall.</p>
<p>Following that, trained monkeys are given a bunch of darts. The door is closed, and if an applicant gets their file hit by one, they’re in! If more than one dart hits a file, the monkeys get another shot.</p>
<p>In all seriousness, it would be interesting to get some insight from college admissions officials.</p>