There are close to 4,000 colleges in the US at varying price points (some states have free community colleges, some private schools cost of to 70k a year). There are probably about 100 schools that have pockets deep enough to meet 100% demonstrated need and 3 that will meet 100% demonstrated need with considerable aid if your family makes $150k+ (with normal assets).
Parents are first in line when it comes to paying for their child’s education. When they don’t want to or feel the need to pay, they are essentially asking for other people’s parents to pay (where do you think the monies for financial aid comes from; taxpayers, and people who generously give back to their schools). Many families pay for college from past monies (savings), present income and future (loans)
Being poor does not get you a big windfall of $$ at most of the 4000 schools in the US. If you have a 0 EFC, you get a whole $5800 in Pell and a $5500 student loan. Some states (California gives generous tuition aid for instate residents who qualify. NYS gives $5100 if you have a 0 EFC and goes way down after that). Even then, it will not be enough for you to send your child “away to college” with out additional resources.
Remember the quote: I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet.
Saving for college is not a bad thing because it gives your child options that they would not have otherwise if you made your current salary and was waist deep in debt and no way of affording school.
No one is entitled to a 70k/year education.
The overwhelming majority of schools in the US do not meet 100% demonstrated need. It is wonderful to say that if you make up to $200k ad have normal assets that you can go to Harvard for 20k. Getting around that 5% admit rate is another story.
Run the net price calculator and have a realistic talk with your child and let them know how much you are willing to pay /borrow for his/her education.
College will look different for every family.Some will happily write the check, while others do it begrudingly.
Some kids may benefit from getting a full athletic scholarship, while others may get a full academic scholarship.
Some families will seek merit money, while others will start at the local CC for 2 years while they get their monies together for the last 2 years of school.
Some students attend a 4 year school while living at home.
Some students will work over the summer (maybe even 2 jobs) while taking out student loans ($5500, freshmen, $6500 Sophomore, $7500 junior/senior year), while working on campus.
Some may be lucky enough to snag a RA position that will defray the cost of room.
Some may get a job on campus with food services where they will be able to eat free.
Different strokes for different folks.