<p>A friend of mine, a girl, has started to really change lately. Originally, we were really good friends, but then she just started to hang out with other kids. These other kids are fine, and I have no problem with that, but she also has started to drink a lot. Her mind is solely focused on having fun, and she's really a little kid at heart. I know I'm not her dad or anything, but it really concerns me how much she drinks. She gets very drunk every weekend night, and she treats it just like some fun activity. When I asked her if she was drunk last night, she responded, "Of course I was! Why wouldn't I be?" I don't drink, and I have stopped hanging out with her because she does, and I don't know how to approach her about this topic. She can't be serious about things because she has such a little kid demeanor, but she's 18, and now, I'm afraid our friendship may be in jeopardy because of her choices and drinking habits. Recently, she had so much that her body temperature dropped rapidly and she almost had to be rushed to the hospital. I really care about her, and I want to do something about this and hopefully keep our friendship, but I don't know how to approach her and talk to her about this. Any advice???</p>
<p>I've found that once someone gets into a "party mode" it's very difficult to do anything about it besides accepting it or getting a new friend. She'll need to figure out for herself whether this new lifestyle works for her, and if you attempt to decide for her, you'll grow more distant.</p>
<p>Good luck, these things rarely turn out well.</p>
<p>You sound overly judgmental.</p>
<p>Man, just deal with it.
Live your own life and not others</p>
<p>Jeez, some of you guys are really harsh. </p>
<p>this sounds more serious than the usual partying teenager situation because she had to go to the hospital because of her drinking, so it could be a sign of a problem. You could try talking to her, but you should sound like you're really worried about her (which you are) and not like you think she's a bad person now because she's drinking (which doesn't seem to be what you think). Good luck and I hope your friend turns out okay</p>
<p>Dang, apparently some of you don't get the concept of being a good friend. </p>
<p>Just tell her that you're worried about how much she drinks when she does. If she's drinking to the point that people worry about whether she needs to go to the hospital, she definitely has a problem. She'll probably get all defensive and stuff, but someone needs to tell her to slow it down before she hurts herself.</p>
<p>I agree with BusinessGuy, there is little you can do when someone adopts this mindset. People grow up eventually and you shouldn't treat her as a little child, she has a brain and she will learn from her experiences, there are some things you just can't teach people no matter how much you wish you could.</p>
<p>Doesn't she have parents?</p>
<p>Some people on this topic are crazy...just leave her alone and let her make her own mistakes? When she's being sent to the hospital? Right, that's a good idea...</p>
<p>Look, the key is definitely not to be judgemental, or tell her she's childish, or get mad, or whatever. Just tell her that you're worried about her and you don't want to see her hurt. She probably won't listen to you, but as her friend it's your responsibility to at least tell her you're there for her and you care about her. Sometimes simple things like that make people look twice at a situation, sometimes they don't.</p>
<p>To b4nnd20: Yeah she has parents, and they're really nice, and I highly doubt they anticipated this.</p>
<p>When she came to school, she didn't drink at all, but she has adopted a "try everything once" mindset, but that's not how it is with the drinking. Sometimes now there's just tension between us whenever we're together. I think it's really taking a toll on our friendship. I admit I haven't always been completely accepting of it, but I would like to do all that's possible to help her through it.</p>
<p>It's gonna be almost impossible to get her out of this mindset. People that drink this much just want to fit in and be in a crowd. It's gonna be hard for you to argue against her fitting in and having fun. However, on the flipside, most people do grow out of the overdrinking routine in their later years of college, or so ive heard.</p>
<p>You really should just sit down with her and talk about it. One-on-one, or with max of one other person with you who also knows her well. As her friend, it is your right to let her know how her behavior is affecting you and your friendship. Hell, it's your responsibility.</p>
<p>I had to do the same thing with one of my friends back in November, and while it was so hard and I felt like crap afterwards, it was necessary because she was getting out of hand and was really starting to worry me. Say that she's your friend, and that you want her to have fun, but that recently she's begun to worry you. Be completely honest, but make sure she knows you're on her side.</p>
<p>eh alot of kids go thru a phase around age 18 where they suddenly start drinking/smoking. gotta give them their space</p>
<p>I have the same problem with people i left back home, ....'cept with coke. Sometimes people are stuck in high school, and when they're in a world that's new, they act like kids, and don't think about next week's consequences,...or for that, the next 5 minutes. Drinking on the weekends ain't that bad, but when ur always stoned, or ur number 1 priority is getting blow or getting drunk, then there's a problem. Just tell her to chill, and grow up, if she doesn't, she'll hit a wall and have to face real consequences.</p>
<p>I would only worry about it if she drank herself to a state of unconsciousness. I know guys who have "almost" been rushed to the hospital as well, but really they dont have a significant problem. That one time, they obviously made a bad mistake, but hopefully they learn from it. </p>
<p>Seriously, this sounds harsh, but lots of people who don't drink overanalyze these types of situations. As college kids, many people are going to drink and drink a lot. It's no big deal as long as they aren't drinking so much that they blackout everytime they drink. My roomate calls me an alcoholic all the time, but my friends no that isnt true. Hell, ive never even thrown up. Simply because he doesnt drink, he assumes that when I cant walk in a straight line or speak without slurring that Im an alcoholic. </p>
<p>If you are very concerned, please mention it to her. It's never good when there is a risk of her vomiting in her sleep, But hopefully with time she will realize her limits, and realize that she doesn't have to drink to have fun.</p>
<p>Kids always get lost when they get to college and drink. I don't drink nor do I plan to.</p>
<p>wow, thats a pretty big generalization... how do you define lost?</p>
<p>lol yah, all people who jump into the ocean drown too. c'mon ain't nuthin wrong with a little bit of fun. I'd just say stay away from pills, needles, powders and opiates. Stick to the herbals and some good booze.
Go greek (the civilization) , all in moderation.</p>
<p>"My roomate calls me an alcoholic all the time, but my friends no that isnt true. Hell, ive never even thrown up."</p>
<p>LOL! You've never thrown up so you don't have a drinking problem? That's a new one. Okay....I'll take your word for it....</p>
<p>BTW I drink sometimes and I don't generally have a problem with it, it's just when people have to go to the hospital for it that seems to be a bad sign.</p>
<p>Well, her friend didn't have to go to the hospital. And yes, my friend calls me an alcoholic simply because he doesn't drink and tries to give me **** when I am drunk. He doesn't realize that I still know he is being a jerk and can understand what he is saying. </p>
<p>A drinking problem is when you drink by yourself, require alcohol on a daily basis, and cannot function in a daily routine. I have none of those problems. The bodies natural defense against alcohol intake is vomiting, which therefore means that when a person consumes a dangerous amount of alcohol, he/she will vomit (or have to have his/her stomach pumped).</p>
<p>Her friend has a partying problem where she simply doesnt know how to act. She doesn't have a drinking problem.</p>
<p>I'm a he btw</p>