Well I’m all done with finals and depending on how my two last grades turns out I’ll end my first year with a 3.93-3.96 GPA. And how do I feel about this? I’m devastated; completely devastated. I know I shouldn’t feel this way but I came into university with such high expectations and I didn’t live up to them and, however irrational it may be, I’m gunning for top med schools and I feel like my chances are torn. But I don’t want to feel this way. Have any of you guys ever had the feeling of holding yourself to such absurdly high standards that you knew if you complained to any of your friends they would ridicule you to no end? What do I have… is it some kind of anxiety? Should I talk to someone about this? Talk about not understanding myself.
Are you pre-med? To do this well in pre-med courses is almost unbelievable.
Most pre-med students had pretty much straight A’s in high school. When they get to a pre-med program, the courses are insanely difficult. The courses have to be insanely difficult because the medical schools have to pick from among thousands of applicants all of whom would have had straight A’s otherwise. This means however that pretty much no one does as well as they expect to, or as they are used to.
I think that some degree of exhaustion / relief / disappointment is likely when the term ends. If it goes on for too long then you should talk to a counselor. It is quite common for very smart people to suffer from some degree of anxiety or depression. The medical profession has gotten a lot better at dealing with this.
Pretty much every medical school in the US is excellent. A 3.93 in pre-med should get you into one of the best. Get a good night’s sleep, take a break, and see how you feel in a couple of days.
A 3.93, let alone a 3.96, places you head and shoulders above most of your peers. It’s actually fantastic. You don’t need a 4.0 to accomplish your goals, and at a certain level 4.0s come down to luck anyway. Anyone can get a teacher that grades particularly harshly or whose teaching style doesn’t jive with your learning style.
Besides, it’s your first year. If you really want to bring that GPA up, you can. But it’s fine where it is. That’s where mine (junior in ChemE) is right now and I am perfectly happy with it.
It sounds like the way you are viewing your grades is causing you a lot of stress and worry. I think meeting with a psychologist to discuss your concerns would really help you as you continue your schooling. You might look into the counseling services at your school now or find someone to see over the summer. Wishing you the best!
Expecting perfection from yourself means you are always doomed to failure, in your eyes. Your expectations are unrealistic and I urge you to make an appointment with a therapist as soon as you get home, if that is in a week or so. Otherwise, visit your school counseling center right away.
My daughter and I were discussing this exact thing last night. I told her that she had exhibited this behavior all of her life, and I believed it was part of her personality. That said, even personality traits can be managed. I agree with the other posters – a good counselor could really help.
You can start with changing your self talk. Instead of telling yourself that anything less than an A is not good enough you could tell yourself that I did my best and whatever I get for a grade is good enough.
I have told my daughter and several students on this board that “your head will not blow off if you don’t get an A!” Your life and future are not ruined. Congratulations for an excellent first year!
I was the same way the first semester I got less than a 4.0. I’ve always been a perfectionist, and the knowledge that I would eventually be judged on my academic performance when I applied to medical schools exacerbated my fear of failure. What helped me was:
- []I did end up seeing a counselor about the constant stress I was putting myself under.
[]I learned more about the med school application process and realized that being well-rounded and showing passion and growth are way more important than the specifics of your grades. Even at top schools, there is room for imperfection.
[]I learned to celebrate what skills I gained or lessons I learned instead of fixating on the grades (e.g. persistence in a hard course, cooperation in group projects, etc.).
[]The most helpful thing for me was having very candid friends who aren’t as self-critical. Hearing friends be so happy to get B’s and even C’s in hard classes kept me grounded.
“I have told my daughter and several students on this board that “your head will not blow off if you don’t get an A!” Your life and future are not ruined. Congratulations for an excellent first year!”
I was actually quite pleased when my younger daughter finally came home with a B+ on a mid-term progress report. I figured it would teach her that you can get a B or two, and the next day the world continues just the same as it was the day before. Nothing had changed and nothing had gone wrong.
…and yes, a 3.93 is a truly excellent first year of university.
^This is something I’ve been telling my daughter since first semester high school. She has yet to get a B and sounds much like @MadamePsychosis.
Are you really “completely devastated”? Or “really disappointed”? And yes, your peers aren’t going to want to hear you complain about your 3.93, its like a girl with a stunning body complaining about pockets of fat on her thighs lol. What were your expectations? A solid 4.0? Do you know what the average GPA is going into US med schools?
I suggest you learn ways to reduce stress and anxiety. Nothing wrong with setting high expectations of yourself so long as you can deal with not reaching your goals every single time. Talk to someone, get more exercise, read self-help books on reducing anxiety, eat well. And most importantly…make sure you have balance in your life. You need to have fun, I hope you are. Good luck and keep up the great work!
Relax,you are buying trouble. College requires independent learning without faculty telling you precisely what to learn and will not learn. A good resource about the differences between high school and college learning has been Southern Methodist U at ALEC.
Typically students earn their lowest grades as they adjust to college learning and expectations. While college is progressively more difficult, higher grades are often earned in majors classes.
There are many excellent comments above such as the overall excellence of med schools. The curriculum of pre-med is difficult, and then there is medical school. Balance your life. Do things that you enjoy and help you relax. You want to attend medical school because…What is it you want to do and be as a person and let medical school fit in the framework of you.
You shouldn’t need anyone to tell you that you are doing extraordinarily well academically. It may not hurt for you to seek some counseling at the school (which should be free) to help you learn how to not be so hard on yourself, to create realistic expectations, to appreciate your own success etc.
Yes, counseling would be the best idea for you. If getting a 3.95 GPA leads you to be so devastated, what will happen to you when you apply for an award but don’t win, take an class at a more demanding school (you were trying to get into Columbia) and face tough competition, or give a presentation and receive critical responses? What if a medical school professor thinks you didn’t perform a task perfectly – how will you survive? A counselor can work with you about getting the proper perspective and perhaps developing some capacity for resilience.
Excellent work, a 3.9 or above is outstanding, especially for premed.
You should be striving for excellence, not perfection. No one is perfect. Otherwise, med schools would only accept applicants with 4.0 GPAs.