When everyone is out partying, I would rather be doing something productive

<p>I think it’s definitely a culture thing. I used to be like that a lot…if Thursday rolled around and I wasn’t drinking for whatever reason, I felt like I was really missing out. And we got wasted without question…several shots in the space of like an hour. It was fun having all the crazy stories and trying to figure out the great mystery of “what happened last night” (even though I do play that game still from time to time), but it really, really got old. Always the same thing, random people I’d never speak to again in dirty houses drinking terrible beer. It was so incredibly fun when I came to college, I thought I’d never get sick of it. But I have to some extent, and while I do drink a decent amount still, it’s a much different thing. Most people just grow out of the freshman mentality. I’m not exactly sure where it came from, maybe just being out on your own for the first time and it seems like the thing to do. But it gets old and people grow out of it, well most people do anyway.</p>

<p>^I agree. Last semester I really liked getting hammered. Now, not so much. Drinking stops being fun when you wake up the next day feeling like death, when you can’t remember anything you did, when you have to use all of your will to keep from vomiting after doing a shot even though your body’s telling you “NO MORE!”. From here on out it’s wine or beer for me, getting a nice buzz going at worst… only time I like hard liquor is when I’m consuming it like an old man sitting by the fireplace, sipping it and enjoying the complex flavors. Not hammering back shots of crappy $8 tequila which tastes and feels like battery acid.</p>

<p>Ultimately what I find most distasteful about the party culture isn’t the alcohol itself. Its the fact that the people who participate in that “scene” have just watched a lot of movies and decided that is the socially acceptable way to have fun. </p>

<p>Young people are very concerned about how others perceive them, and they take the safe route by just mimicking the behavior they see from pop culture. But I personally admire an individualist 1000x more than some “store-bought soul on a skeleton” .</p>

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<p>I think the initial statement sounds pretty true but you go to Ohio State and you’ve only been invited to 1 or 2 parties? No offense, but you seem to ***** & moan all the time in the forum looking for vindication of your lifestyle. What’s wrong with all the jocks on my hall, do you hate them as much as me? Why doesn’t anybody else in college work as hard as me? Blah.</p>

<p>I can assure the others don’t waste their time pondering what you do in your room. Stop complaining about how they choose to live their life. Honestly, I can’t say I fully understand people that don’t like to go out an socialize and instead are recluse, but I don’t complain about it.</p>

<p>Now to actually make an attempt at answering your question, I enjoy going out frequently because it makes me happy. I really enjoy spending time with others and being in a social setting only makes it more enjoyable. Further, I have had nights that were so fantastic me and my buddies could joke about it, dying of laughter, for the entire next day. Do you need to drink to do this, no; however, it does generally increase the fun to be had by all parties. I am a very happy person, I am very secure with myself, and I am straight. This describes most of my friends. That said, going to MIT, I know a lot of people that sound like you. They are fantastic individuals and I respect them for the amazing work they do. As we are friends do they joke about me being a worthless drunk sometimes, yes, do I joke about them being lame, yes. There is respect though as we all understand that different people derive pleasure from different things.</p>

<p>So please: Respect others that make different lifestyle choices.</p>

<p>Okay… it’s almost getting to the point where you can’t post anything here anymore without having your words skewed or misinterpreted. </p>

<p>First, I don’t go to Ohio State.</p>

<p>Second, I NEVER said I hated the jocks that live in my mod. I simply thought it was strange how they would stand talking to you while holding their crotch. They just look ridiculous doing it and it makes you wonder about their mentality. I certainly never said I hated them though. On the contrary, I get along with them just fine. It wasn’t so great at first because I admit I was overly judgmental of them, but they were with me too because I am in the marching band. But once they saw how good we are and how hard we work they formed a respect for me. We started talking a bit and they are perfectly decent people when they want to be. We even have an inside joke for when the guy living across from me smokes weed in his room, which is almost all the time. </p>

<p>Third, I said that when I was at the ONE party, I was invited to another the following night. Not that I have only been invited to one or two parties in total. I’m actually invited to “parties” quite often, but i’m usually busy working on a shoot or already have plans. </p>

<p>Lastly, I clearly said that many of my friends are big partiers and that I’m fine with that until it affects our friendship or their relationships with others. For example, my one friend gets stoned almost everyday, and sometimes he gets stoned and drunk at the same time. Whatever he wants to do, but we planned to hangout with some other friends several times this past quarter, and he didn’t show up ONCE. His excuses being “sorry I was passed out” or “sorry I forgot what time”… it being obvious the his habits are the sole reason. </p>

<p>Many days I spent 12 hours or so away from my room. When I get back i’m tired, and the last thing I want to do is go out and party the entire night. I love hanging out with friends, and on weekends I frequently go to a friend’s apartment where we hangout, sometimes we drink, sometimes we don’t, but it’s never an all out drunkfest like many partake in. </p>

<p>I’m not looking to validate whatever I choose to do with my life. I’m simply trying to understand other’s mentalities that make them want to get wasted 4 nights a week.</p>

<p>Sounds like you could go out and have fun more often if you just learned some basic time-management skills…</p>

<p>Okay, so I was wrong with Ohio State, its Ohio University. 35,000 students instead of 60,000. Apologies, but I don’t think it makes a difference in regards to my point.</p>

<p>Further, as I and other have tried to answer your questions, you ignore our responses and keep trolling for people to take your side. That doesn’t make much sense for somebody looking for answers.</p>

<p>Finally, I would recommend you try getting out more and being more social by attending these parties. Loosen up. Worst case scenario you look back and say that it sucked and you’ve lost 5 nights you’ll never get back. Best case scenario you understand why these social interactions are a blast and it changes your life.</p>

<p>“and it changes your life.”</p>

<p>lol</p>

<p>To the OP:</p>

<p>To be fair, I don’t go to a school where people regularly party almost every night; the only major party nights here are Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday (emphasis on Saturday); usually people are busy doing work on the other nights. For the record, I am not a wild partier, but I am someone who usually goes out every weekend, either Friday or Saturday night (when I go out both nights, I don’t drink, I just go out to see people). I’ve had my nights where I had a little too much, and while I’ve never been blackout I’ve learned from a few other bad experiences.</p>

<p>You said that you’re not trying to judge, you’re just trying to understand the mentality. Although others have tried to do so, I’ll take a stab at it. I don’t think that the vast majority of people go out thinking “dude I want to get so wasted OMG it’s fun to be blackout!!!1!!” Rather, going out is, for a lot of people, a way to see people, meet people, and unqind from the stresses of the week. You said that sometimes you’re away from your dorm for up to 12 hours, and you don’t feel like going out because you’re tired. That’s fine. I think what you don’t understand is that for some people, going out is a way to relax after they’ve had a long stressful day. For example: I am a varsity athlete, an editor of one of the school publications, heavily involved in music, and employed part-time. I’m also a double major in physics and biology. My weeks are insanely hectic, and I’m usually up late because every minute of free time I have is spent doing work. I’m okay with this; I like everything I do, it just means that I work hard.</p>

<p>However, assuming I’m on top of my work, I keep Friday and Saturday evenings as my time to go out and socialize. Being so busy during the week means that there are a lot of friends that I barely get to see, but I know that I can see them during the weekend, so it’s okay. You say that you’re being productive while everyone’s out - that’s fine. If you’re doing something you enjoy, more power to you. But for me (and, I suspect, a lot of people), going out is like a break from being productive - the one time I can relax, stop stressing about work or commitments, and just go hang out with friends. This is totally a personal preference, but I find drinking games to be fun (I’m competitive, haha), and I find it relaxing/entertaining to be slightly buzzed and laugh and talk with my friends after a stressful week.</p>

<p>I guess the difference in mentality is, your preferred way to relax after a long day is to chill and do some video editing/be “productive.” Mine (assuming it’s not a school night) is to socialize, sometimes have a few drinks with friends. My roommate is just like you. People are just different.</p>

<p>reesezpiecez103… </p>

<p>Thank you for the post. This was the sort of reply I was hoping to get. I liked reading your insight about this. Obviously everyone is different and the party mentality even varies from school to school. You said that at your school it’s more of a go out and be social thing rather than go out and get wasted. I do wish I could say that about my school, because I have no problems with being social and having a couple drinks at the same time, but a <em>majority</em> of the people at my school do have a “lets get drunk” mentality. </p>

<p>People will walk around drunk and start screaming “if your not drunk then GTF out!”. I’ve been on the main party street several times during the party hours and it’s just kind of unbelievable how people conduct themselves. It would be 20 degrees out and there are wasted girls with miniskirts stumbling around looking for a party to go to. I have a former friend who has been raped TWICE now at the school because of partying, but she was too drunk at the time to remember who did it. </p>

<p>Then again, I do go to one of the biggest party schools in the country. You may think i’m crazy for doing so, but my program is great, and i’ve been lots of nice people.</p>

<p>Yeah, it’s a weird culture. Participating it can be fun for a while if you are a certain kind of person, I’m not going to deny that. But when you think about it, it’s pretty weird.</p>

<p>Drinking ages you terribly…
Not to mention lots of calories, bad for organs, and more…</p>

<p>I think it can’t be called being an “elitist snob” because since we’re underage, I feel justified in feeling elite as a law abiding citizen compared to those who break the law.
And damage their health as I said…it’s a better choice not to drink period.</p>

<p>Some people need it to be able to socialize or only do it because others do, I think that’s kind of sad…</p>

<p>Think about it, do you really like the taste? If you were alone or with family, would you drink it? If it’s just with that set of friends you feel like an oddball or prude if you don’t, then you have just submitted to peer pressure.</p>

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Of many alcohols, yes. It’s going to be different for everybody and vary on personal tastes

Yes. I drink with my parents.</p>

<p>Now I’m assuming you are talking about drinking beers such as Natty or Keystone. I actually find them perfectly okay and refreshing. Are there better drinks, yes. They are cheap though. Drinking is fun. I enjoy drinking, I’m a perfectly functioning member of society. I drank in High School too, oh no! I am very content with myself, very content with my college and never drink just because my friends are drinking. If you don’t enjoy it, don’t do it, but people that do are no sad souls who just submit to peer pressure.</p>

<p>When I do drink, it is generally rum. I honestly don’t like the taste at all by itself, so I mix it with Dr. Pepper or something, and that makes it tolerable. But I usually only do that in social situations. I may have had a drink by myself once, and it was because I was incredibly stressed out and a long day. </p>

<p>I’ve tried beer, but sadly I just think it’s disgusting. I can barely get it down. Of course miller lite may not be the best beer to judge taste off of. </p>

<p>The first band party I went to, we had this awesome fruit punch that had either rum or vodka in it, but you couldn’t taste it at all. THAT was kind of fun I have to say.</p>

<p>I don’t think partying and being productive are mutually exclusive, or at least for me. Face it, 90% of the time when I am by myself, I am just procrastinating. I don’t really want to “party” all the time, per se, but social activities really aren’t a waste of time for me with that in mind.</p>

<p>You hardly have to get wasted to go partying. Drink enough to make you more sociable (1-3 drinks), have some fun, then go on with your life. No different than a night spent watching a movie or whatever. If parties aren’t your scene, just drink with friends and hang out.</p>

<p>“I know that drinking will help me learn valuable social skills.”</p>

<p>See, I could really see myself getting into drinking…if only this weren’t the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard in my life.</p>

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<p>I have to echo that sentiment. These people must have had horrible childhoods if they compare mundane, petty, and sometimes childish social interactions to something “life changing”. Pathetic.</p>

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<p>Worse case scenario you die.</p>

<p>Wiscongene just hates on normal human interaction–eg, the kind you can’t get on the Internet.</p>

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<p>Yeah, um, as a drinker, that’s stupid. Alcohol doesn’t help you “learn” better social skills. You may gain social skills from interacting with people you have met at parties, or feel less like an “outcast” if you’re out partying, but alcohol teaches you nothing. It’s how you choose to react to it…people react in all kinds of ways. Non-drinkers in the same situations as drinkers will also get these benefits, as they are also capable of meeting people at parties and such. But once you sober up, you don’t have magical social skills, they are the same as before. You don’t actually learn anything. There are some drugs that I personally believe will teach you lasting skills (sometimes social), but alcohol is not one of them.</p>