When ppl assume you'll get into top schools b/c they don't know how competitive it is

<p>Basically everyone who breaks 2000 is a test genius at my school.</p>

<p>this reminds me of when I chose a college and people I didn't know well would say "so where are you going to school next year?" and I would say "oh, I'm going to [my current university]" and they'd say "wow that's a really good school!!"
what do you do to that? "yup I know aren't I accomplished!?" NO. so usually I would say "yeah I'm pretty excited about it" which was the truth.
then one time the person goes "yeah but it's a really good school!" and then I was stumped. ha.</p>

<p>Why not just reply something like, "Thanks for your huge vote of confidence....I could use it. So many students just like me apply and are rejected. The Ivies are looking for a very specific freshman class each year and they review a lot of criteria most people don't realize. It's all pretty secretive. Wish me luck!"</p>

<p>Hmm am I the only optimist amongst a sea of pessimists? I don't know about you guys, but my parents don't think I'll get into any Ivies I'm applying to (I understand their constant dose of reality nevertheless) and my friends are all smart people so we're all afraid of "jinxing" ourselves by telling others they'll get into Stanford. </p>

<p>So in a sense, I have to keep myself upbeat by telling myself there could be the chance the adcoms check the wrong box and accept me...haha...</p>

<p>hey hannahmontana! wow, featured thread. </p>

<p>i think if your friends are telling you this, theyre just being nice. i think someone earlier said that its not like you can just reply "OH YEAH SLIM CHANCES". and i agree w/ everyone else about keeping your choice of schools secret. then when you do get accepted, you can just say where you're going w/out having to mention where you got rejected.</p>

<p>besides, those scores that you mentioned in the first post really are spectacular. they'll put you in the pool to COMPETE with others getting in, even though as you say there is no way to guarantee admission.</p>

<p>those stories you have are frightening~</p>

<p>We get this a lot from the grandparents. That generation has NO idea what college admissions are like these days.</p>

<p>They also can't believe what college tuition is. They really can't. :D</p>

<p>^So true! My grandpa says I would get into Georgetown no problem, probably because he took classes at American, Columbia, and Georgetown under the G.I. Bill I think. He also thinks he can pay my tuition for me... I tell him he can pay for my books haha</p>

<p>Best to keep where you are applying under your vest. </p>

<p>The other thing to bear in mind, while you and your high school are right to be happy that a student has gotten in the 95% on the SAT and is a top 1% student, the facts are that the entire top 5% of the SAT test takers and top1% of all high school students can't all go to HYPSM. </p>

<p>HYPSM is not some magic formula for success in life. Many truly successful people have gone to "lesser" schools. Try to keep the process in perspective. While I would encourage everyone to reach for their goals, it is good to broaden your search, find a lot of places including a safety where you can be happy, and your search will be successful. </p>

<p>Where I grew up there was a local university that got a lot of good students for many reasons. Good financial aid for top students was one of the foremost. It is almost never mentioned in these forums, but graduates go on to many prestigious grad schools from there. One person I knew turned down Harvard for a full scholarship to local U. This was back in the day when you were saddled with loans and work study even from Harvard.</p>

<p>Just smile and say, "Thank you!". That's really all there is to it. It's more or less an all-purpose response.</p>

<p>the only thing i have to say is that people don't realize how important it is to have good extra curriculars and show dedication in what you love to do. Lots of people can get good test scores.</p>

<p>My uncle and I were talking about applying to college/college application process and he asked me about my first choice college -- which is a reach for me -- and when I added "I don't have good chances though, it's very competitive," he began to think I didn't want to go there... Ignorance is very annoying...</p>

<p>Something that's been INCREDIBLY helpful to make people realize how competitive college is, is to tell them the acceptance rate, but phrase it so that you say "Well, thanks for the encouragement, but only about 8 out of every 100 people who apply end up getting accepted" </p>

<p>It usually follows with a gaping mouth and look of utter shock and amazement. When you phrase it real-world terms instead of abstract percentages, it gets A LOT scarier.</p>

<p>that's what happened to me when I applied for a magnet school nearby.</p>

<p>i just don't tell anyone..</p>

<p>Hannahmontana:
I know why suggestions "Then don't tell where you are applying" are hard to folllow. people like to talk about what is on their mind, i.e. seniors want to talk about colleges.
My suggestion is to choose one or two schools from your list that are "top" enough, tTHAT YOU LIKE, WHERE PEOPLE WILL HAVE NO PROBLEM SEING YOU, but that are not far-far-far-reaches for you. And don't forget to mention them together with, say, Yale and Stanford, when asked what schools you want to go to. With equal enthusiasm. This way, if you do not get into Yale and Stanford but get into those schools (a likely outcome for a strong applicant) you will not get condolences from everyone you ever spoke to. If you do not get into your matches .... well, this is bad luck and not what you deserve, and thus a reason for condolences. But this is also a relatively unlikely outcome.</p>

<p>An average HS student does not have a 3.8 GPA and 2240 SAT's. You need to get a realistic outlook here. Do not get too nuts with this. It is all in perspective here. Many kids who do not have all the great stats have success at lesser tier schools. You guys need to step back take a deep breath and be grateful. You will feel better.</p>

<p>It is frustrating but there isn't much you can do. D is the oldest of many cousins. When she was applying to Princeton all the grandparents, aunts and uncles said she was a shoo in with her perfect SAT, top GPA from a highly competitive high school etc. Lots of eye rolling when we expressed any stress or uncertainty about the outcome. Her acceptance was no surprise to them at all.... at the time. Now that my brothers and sisters are getting into the college admissions years with their children they say they can't believe that D did get in!</p>

<p>You could just not talk about it as much, tell them it's hard and nothing is for sure. </p>

<p>I don't understand your need to hear stories of failures. I don't see how these stories can be constructive in any way for your situation. Why don't you write some good essays so that you don't have to linger in your pessimism so much?</p>

<p>I do know some kids who didn't end up where they should have gone. In many cases, however, I also believe that they didn't apply to enough schools.</p>

<p>As the OP said, this is more about dealing with other people's reactions to a (potential) rejection. </p>

<p>When my D got into 5 out of 6 schools she applied to, and one of them, X, was a big name school, people would ignore the other 4 (less well known, equally good) and say, Oh X is a great school. As if it was the only one that mattered. (She visited, hated it, and didn't go!) </p>

<p>The other reaction was that a lot of people assumed that she applied to a certain top school in her field (she didn't) and when she didn't mention it after acceptances, people just assumed that she hadn't gotten in and therefore was picking "second-best-school" (which was actually her first choice) and was saving face by not mentioning getting rejected by top-school. </p>

<p>The competitiveness among parents is terrible. Makes my skin crawl!</p>

<p>I like this response a lot:</p>

<p>"I'm not sure Harvard is right for me, but I haven't ruled it out yet."</p>