<p>We leave to take DS to college in just over 2 weeks. He seems to think he can pack everything he needs in a day or two (latest excuse, "I am wearing the clothes I want to take"). I prefer not to take the "let him screw up and then have to buy stuff at full price or do without" approach, so I've been collecting things like the toiletries, basic school supplies, desk stuff, sheets, blanket, etc. and starting a mound in his bedroom (he has moved himself to the basement so his bedroom is fair game). He is refusing to take a toolkit (thinks its totally unnecessary) so the one we bring to assemble stuff will come home with us. </p>
<p>Yes, I know that in part he assumes I'll take care of a lot of this stuff, but although I am doing a lot of the shopping (and to his credit, we have done some of it together, and he is limited b/c he totalled his car so can't get around when we are at work) I was not planning to do the packing into the duffles and big plastic bin things. If he packs it, he'll know what he has and where it is. I so dislike the last minute stuff, and yes, I know if he forgets stuff he can buy it on campus or do without, unless we send a package, but buying at the campus store is expensive. Yes, I suspect they will take the kids shoppping during the orientation week, but all this is besides the point. I really wish I could find the proper incentive (besides access to the car) to get the packing started. Anyone else have this problem??</p>
<p>My D started to pack last year a couple of days before she had to leave. So, it is possible! I don't know about what it is like for boys. Currently her stuff is in piles throughout our (very small) apartment, and she is leaving back again in about three weeks. She says she has to weed out most of the stuff that she brought back because it's way too much. She will probably do that a couple of days before departure. Yes, jym, it's their problem!! They'll figure it out. What did they used to say? Swallow a band-aid?</p>
<p>What's the worst case scenario if you stand back and let him do his own packing? It'll bug you, sure, but will it do any real harm?</p>
<p>I'd probably try to make a joke of it, like: "Son, I'll make you a deal: If you do your packing without any nagging from me, I won't cry in front of your roommate and tell stories about when you were a fat little naked baby in the bathtub."</p>
<p>It only took D about a day (in total, not all at once) to pack for freshman year -- takes less time now. She was also sorting out/packing up her entire room for our move, which happened right after she left for school.</p>
<p>A year from now, when S is getting ready for school, I'm sure it will take him even less time. Of course I fully anticipate he'll forget stuff, but he'll have to deal with it.</p>
<p>LOL lunitari! I have brought up the toilet training pictures on the potty a time or two.......</p>
<p>Franglish??? Swallow a bandaid?????</p>
<p>Yes, I know it'll get done, but am also slightly haunted by older s's experience a week before he left for college. He'd had his wisdom teeth out and was given one dose (yes, one dose) of an antibiotic --he ended up 10 days later in the hospital for 3 days with pseudomembranous colitis, and we got him out a the day before we were leaving for college. Fast forward.. younger s went to the dermatologist for the first time last week. He told them about older s' reaction to the specific antibiotic (that has been known to cause C-diff and colitis). The derm. put him on a different oral antibiotic but also a topical cream-- and guess what is in it?!?! The "bad" antibiotic that got older s sick!! We will talk about this at the follow-up appointment next Tuesday (which, if he gets sick, will be in that 10 day timeframe that it hit older s). In the meantime younger s is taking lots of probiotics and eating lots of yogurt to keep the flora and fauna in balance in his gut. I don't need a repeat of that mess! It was no fun.. and thank heavens most of his packing had already been in process.</p>
<p>My kids are notorious about packing the night before. Last year I started collecting things in the corner of the dining room. D did manage to forget a lot - like her bed pad and blankets. I have never found the right balance between butting out and doing it myself.</p>
<p>My son packed the night before. Made me crazy. But that was all the time he needed. I offered to help, warned, cajoled and so on and so on. Had no effect. And he never used the tool kit we insisted he bring, so you can stop worrying about that. Not even sure he and DH used it on move-in day... maybe a tiny bit.</p>
<p>I had done what little shopping was necessary (mostly BB&B for pick-up at school area store). We did some shopping as a family at Target/BBB/such like on the day before move-in at the stores near the school.</p>
<p>They have bigger things on their minds at this time, I think. Last summer with friends, possible lowgrade anxiety about what college will be like. Packing is not on their list of concerns. Their priorities are probably better than ours :D. </p>
<p>I <em>did</em> do virtually all of the unpacking and dorm room set up. Let's face it, that was for me as much as for him. I set it up the way I thought it <em>should be.</em> I could envision it in my mind. I'm sure it never looked that way again. I set him up sophomore year, too, while he and DH did something else important (what could that have been?) I set him up partially jr. year before he lost patience. He probably won't let me near the place this year ;).</p>
<p>Unpacking: All we did was make the bed for him (me) and help assemble storage units & set up computer access (DH.) I made the bed cause it made me happy. The guys had more fun playing with the computer.</p>
<p>I was a basketcase over the packing thing his freshman year but have gotten over it now. S1 packs "the morning of" for big trips, including his 8 weeks abroad this year. He is moving into an apartment this Saturday (rising third year) which presumably will include furniture like a bed, dresser, and chair and he hasn't started even thinking about the move yet. He needs to borrow or rent a truck and as far as I know hasn't made that arrangment yet either but tells us not to worry.</p>
<p>I told him I would insist on cleaning bathroom, kitchen, living room and his bedroom (4 bedroom house) and will be bringing the vacuum and all cleaning supplies but the rest was up to him. He said as long as I didn't throw anything away (I tend to dispose of old magazines and stuff when I clean), I would be allowed to clean but it wasn't necessary. I also indicated I would really like to shampoo the rug from his room last year, but need him to put it out on the deck. It's too heavy for me to bring it down from the attic by myself. He agreed that would be OK for me to do, but hasn't actually put the rug out yet.</p>
<p>I guess my point is that things could be worse. Because his school is so close (only an hour drive) and we go up for all the football games, we have been able to bring things that he forgets and he has been willing to live without or borrow stuff until he sees us again so there isn't the cost factor. He seems to have done OK with his overseas packing--very, very light packer able to live out of a small backpack for months on end apparently.</p>
<p>jym: You always bring a smile to my face.....Just be happy you don't have a girl; she thinks she's bringing her entire closet with her....Yes, we will definitely be bringing stuff back with us...Difficult to drum this into her head.....and, yes, she will be packing the night before; it's just the way she is wired.......</p>
<p>we've already told her that she will be running alongside the car if she packs too many clothes......</p>
<p>I think this is a great time to let a kid take responsibility for himself, and I certainly cannot imagine it taking more than a day to pack for college so long as things needed have already been purchased and the laundry is done.</p>
<p>I have suggested twice to my daughter that she begin packing as she will be flying herself to school cross country and can only take so much. It would be nice if she gave some thought to what she needs to take with her (in one huge suitcase, another normal suitcase that can ride atop the biggie, one carry on, and a purse) in advance so as to have the time to make any necessary acquisitions and pack boxes to ship after she's arrived. I can't say I'm terribly worried with two-plus weeks to go, but I did manage to get her thinking about it a bit by starting a three-column list of "Bring", "Ship", and "Buy at School" items. (I handed her the laptop and she actually made some additions.) A couple weeks ago I did some research and printed out public transportation maps and identified routes that would take her to Office Depot and Target, etc. I also bought her a public transportation pass (which will also get her to campus on move-in day). Now I'm going to chill. (Or try...until the time is closer anyway.;))</p>
<p>This is the truth:
My second son was going to school by plane, so the amount of "stuff" was limited. The night before we were going to leave, I woke up at 3:00 a.m. and DS was still not home. I called him, he was at Wal-Mart with his friend, getting a few things. Although everything was in his room, as it had been all summer, nothing was organized or packed. He came home around 4:00 a.m., packed, and was ready to go! Didn't forget a thing, and got it all done with no help.</p>
<p>First son, a different story. We collected "stuff" for months. Probably started packing weeks in advance, had to help with every step of the way! Kind of like the application process. First son, we helped. Second son, completely on his own!</p>
<p>S1 took no interest in buying or packing. I just bought stuff and threw it in boxes as we went along. He didn't need a lot of "stuff". I think it all went in a few big boxes. Didn't even pack his shirts, just left them on hangers and threw them in the backseat so all he had to do was hang them in the dorm closet when we got there. I did help make the bed. The whole move-in was far less complicated than I anticipated.</p>
<p>S2 leaves next Sat. Packing has not entered his mind. He is so busy hanging out with his friends...gotta have priorities. DH and I did a big Wal-Mart trip for him last week. The bags are piled and waiting in the spare room. The clothes will go just like S1's..on the hangers and stuffed in a duffle bag. I'm much more laid back the second time around which prob. means this will turn out to be move-in day from****,lol.</p>
<p>No signs of packing here either. The spare bedroom is the collection center though and there still seems to be 2 carloads worth of bedding and stuff in there - just no clothes or personal items. Since we're taking one car - and the dog - this is looking very interesting.</p>
<p>I'm not only sending my oldest off for the first time but can't make the trip with him. This means that to some extent I'll have to defer to him and my husband, both of whom would take off for a weekend with one clean pair of underwear and a toothbrush. Neither can plan in advance either (I've been trying to tell my husband that he is not indeed coming home after leaving the college but has to go straight to an out-of-town soccer tournament for the siblings--"tell me when it's closer").</p>
<p>Like most other first-time moms, I've been accumulating things all summer which are in one corner of his room. They head out on a Wednesday, so I won't mention packing until the weekend before. My hope is to get the bulk of the packing and loading done that weekend, but I'm not holding my breath.</p>
<p>I'm really not too concerned. There is always buying last-minute/forgotten stuff once they're up there, plus I'm totally counting on borrowing things from some friendly girl down the hall who packed <em>everything</em> (tools, scissors, tape, . . . ?).</p>
<p>No packing at my house either, and we leave in ten days. A couple of things that were purchased (mattress pad, etc) are piled in the spare room, and there is a stack of boxes in the living room.</p>
<p>D has made progress with some of the other necessities though, financial arrangements and computer stuff, so it's starting to move along. I think she'll probably pack next week, and we're planning a shopping trip for this weekend.</p>
<p>It does make a difference if you are going a few hours by car or packing everything to go on a plane or to ship.</p>
<p>And knowing in advance that there's a Target, Walmart, or the like near to the new abode takes a lot of the pressure off. Need a fan? Bookshelves would be nice? No problem! :)</p>