OP: can you ask your parents to help you create a budget and a plan to pay for college? Pick a college or two that they like and work the numbers with them. They may not change their minds after working the numbers but at least they’ll have a better understanding of what you’re dealing with.
Also, if the opportunity arises, you might want to point out that you look forward to being able to help family in “the old country” after you graduate and pay off your debts. From an investment perspective, they may come to realize that spending money on you up front will benefit the family in the long run. (This is only if you actually want to be involved at this level.)
As you said, you aren’t going to change their minds but you seem to want to keep a good relationship with them. So asking for their advice and support in financial planning will benefit everyone.