Where Do The "Nice Kids" Go To College?

<p>I not only don't find the discussion odd, I find it important. I guess maybe it's more of a question of at what schools will the students be nice to different types of students, how outgoing are they, how welcoming, how materialistic, how obsessed with work or play? organizations have a culture.
example
Our h.s. marching band, post performance, waits in the bleachers standing up. They don't talk or move around. They don't sit during the actual awards. When awards are given they are silent. When the awards are over the leaders walk to the bleachers, and salute the kids, presenting any award. Then they all go wild. Other schools yell through the award ceremony, cheer when the win. No one announced this behavior in the 14 years we've attended competitions. It was passed down by older students.
Schools where everyone says hello, older ones introduce themselves to younger students, recruit new kids to join groups, have a culture of friendliness. Doen't mean nicer kids but the effect is that it feels nicer to a certain kind of kid.
my dd1 attends a school where there are dorm residents that are h.s. dancers, plus there are college dancers and actors. More of the kids are into looks, and many are very into weight. Food obsessions and a focus on looks can be overwhelming. Focus on professional success is high. These are nice kids! it's a world from the hello, welcome, let's get to know ya of other schools.</p>

<p>OinJ--I can't recall which you are, but I think we've probably been at competitions against your school.</p>

<p>Ours were the enthusiastic ragamuffins in the ancient uniforms that didn't quite fit right--nicest, politest kids you could imagine, and played their hearts out, but yeah, I am probably sure they cheered when awards were given out. For everyone.</p>

<p>I really miss band competitions!</p>

<p>I think a few people missed my point. It wasn't just that I was saying that there are "nice" kids everywhere, but rather I was trying to point out that one's perception of what constitutes "nice" or "friendly" is going to be very subjective. Therefore, it is impossible to say that the original poster's daughter is going to find a "nice" and "friendly" vibe at any school without knowing her, or at least knowing what SHE would perceive as "nice" and "friendly."</p>

<p>So, I go back to my original suggestion: The original poster shouldn't worry about asking others to identify colleges they've found filled with "nice kids." She should worry about helping her daughter identify where SHE would feel most comfortable socially, the types of people SHE would feel are "nice," and the types of people she might feel uncomfortable around. Once she defines that, she can then come back and ask a more specific question (i.e., Where might a kind of quirky kid find friendly people, or a kid that goes to church on Sundays, or a kid with piercings and tatoos, or a kid who loves going to huge sporting events, or a kid that loves the thought of being part of a sorority, etc ...) As I said, both my daughter and I think her school is a really friendly place, filled with "nice" people, but someone with a different definition of "nice" might see things differently. :)</p>

<p>it's the West Orange Marching Mountaineers. woo hooo. we were once the ones with poorly fitting uniforms, and a total of two different flags. It's mostly been improved by fundraising.
Band kids are nice kids, so there!
I do enjoy band competitions.</p>

<p>I think schools with a focus on public service might be apt to attract outgoing, involved students.<br>
Also, I'd look for schools where there's where there's respect for others' opinions, liberal or conservative.</p>

<p>Since your D is interested in Engineering & snow, here's a vote for Case Western. It's small enough that kids get to know each other and the professors. And I have noticed that a bunch of the "nicest" kids from my son's HS go there. (Including my nice son. And he has found a "nice" girlfriend there.) ;)</p>

<p>REasonabledad: Rice has a great engineering department, but no snow. Many years ago, when DD was looking at schools, she interviewed there with a senior electrical engineering student, an african-american female. (All Rice student interviewers are unpaid volunteers!) When it was time for the parents to come in and ask questions, I asked her if she felt stressed out by her curriculum or work at Rice over the years. She said that it wasn't until now, the fall semester of her senior year, that she felt stressed - and then, it was the stress of figuring out what options she wanted to pursue after Rice, (and she had quite a few!). They work hard at Rice, but it's well supported. :) Your DD might consider adding it to her college list, since it has strong departments in many areas, and flexibility in changing majors and meeting program requirements.</p>

<p>colorado school of mines?</p>

<p>Also, I'd look for schools where there's where there's respect for others' opinions, liberal or conservative.</p>

<p>??? Is there such a place...anywhere??? I'd love to go there..</p>

<p>Ah, OJ, we are pretty near neighbors (don't want to name our town in public since I've said thousands of posts worth of stuff about my kids), but I think we actually were not in any of the same competitions with you.</p>

<p>All the fund raising in the world (and our Music Parents Assoc is formidable) can't make up for how underfunded our school system is, alas. But band was still the premier activity of both my kids' HS careers.</p>

<p>You might try the University of Tulsa, a private school in Oklahoma. Makes the list for happiest students and is described in various college guides with quotes from students such as everyone is so nice here it seems unreal or midwestern friendliness pervades this campus. Engineering is strong there and it is on the list of best buys due to its lower price tag.</p>

<p>"It was quite amusing to find that D, who although still considered quiet by the "outside" world, was one of the more socially skilled & outgoing inside the Reed bubble."</p>

<p>I know a young woman who had a similar experience at U of Chicago. Like most students there, she'd been considered one of the bookish, introverted kids in high school, never part of the popular crowd. At college, she stood out as one of the more attractive and flirtatious women in the class. She turned into the belle of the ball. She had a very active "popular" social life that I don't think she would have found at a school better known for its social life.</p>

<p>As of now even Seattle and Portland are in the mix. In Vancouver we have two inches on the ground as of 9:15 AM</p>

<p>Unwritten02 - I am not against frats, per se, because most of the time frats are not threatening. I guess I may not be the best judge of this since I go to a school, Princeton, where frats are pretty much the outcasts (although well attended) of the social scene. However, as a witness of sexual molestation and assault at frat houses, I always promote an air of caution. </p>

<p>I also believe that some of the previous posters have made some good points about the dispositions of college students, and I agree with most of them. There are many more things to worry about, in my opinion, than whether college students are "nice" in the traditional sense. Just because people don't strike up conversations with strangers in the hallway doesn't mean the students aren't friendly...its just a different social standard. What's important is that students are tolerant of diversity, are courteous, and that a widespread appreciation of all the activities and student groups exists across campus.</p>

<p>betterday - I second Mines! (My dh's alma mater and where I worked in admissions decades ago.) Small school in a great town (Golden), very nice kids, respected engineering programs...and Winter Park, Breckenridge, Copper Mountain, Steamboat....need I say more? (btw...she'll love the guy to girl ratio.. ;) )</p>

<p>USC has at least one nice kid. Maybe two or three with Himom and PKB's off-spring. No, no. There are probably more. I've read lots of the nice threads on the USC forum here so there must be 10 or 15 other really nice kids there. Then we need to subtract those who appear angry. I guess they're not so nice. So let's say there are at least 15 nice kids at USC. Is that enough? </p>

<p>Cheers. I think your son is really nice even though he chose Brown over USC. Too bad. It would have made at least 16 nice kids at USC. Wait it would have been back to 15 since the first nice kid I mentioned is graduating. I'm really confused about this. </p>

<p>Brown is probably filled with really nice kids.</p>

<p>I think every tuition-paying kid here at UM-Madison is nice.</p>

<p>Snow
As of now even Seattle and Portland are in the mix. In Vancouver we have two inches on the ground as of 9:15 AM
</p>

<p>Some nice kids playing in the snow</p>

<p>They are actually not all caucasian- they are just pale from being in the library since Sept.</p>

<p>They really do look nice. And the setting is lovely.</p>

<p>Great pictures, nice looking kids, fun. Reed looks lovely</p>

<p>As Carolyn closes in on 6,000 posts, I'll suggest that she's pretty savvy and knows what she's talking about here. Instead of trying to nail down a vague quality of likeability, I'd recommend that propsective students try to get a sense of the prevalent trends among the student body of each campus they visit, and then decide whether they would wish to be influenced to be similar. Whether intended or not, they will probably come to reflect the dominant campus culture more and more the longer they're there. FWIW, my D is a freshman at Harvard. A year ago, I anticipated that she'd have to deal with a significant amount of arrogance and elitism. Surprise, surprise - most of her classmates are about the nicest, most unpretentious bunch of kids I've ever met.</p>