Just one parent? Both? Do we include little sib? Or do we just send dad since I’m known to get very weepy and save D18 the embarrassment and honestly the airfare expense for atttending Family Weekend in October? Or is it not to be missed and a right of passage that I will regret if I don’t go? @-)
We were told by other parents to drop and not stick around. If you are looking at a flight, I would say one parent do drop off, and then go back as a family and enjoy family weekend. For my daughter’s school, their freshman orientation basically starts right away. PS. I’m going to be a weepy mess but will hope to hold it together until I get back into the car ; )
Whatever you want to do is fine. I went off to college on my own (although to a familiar city with lots of friends nearby). My niece was accompanied by her parents on a SW flight for the 2 bags per person. For my first kid, she flew into the closest airport after a summer away and her sister and I met her with all the stuff (it was about 2 hours from our house). For the second I drove her with WAY too much stuff.
For us both parents did the drop offs and both were weepy, or at least choked up. We didn’t hang around campus but did touristy things in the region, then stopped by briefly a few days after the drop off to do one final run for supplies target Target if needed. Then final good bye and we flew away.
It’s a personal choice, but for us, the decision was easy since we only had room for three people + her stuff. So I went with Kiddo #2. He was the muscle. It took way longer than we anticipated to get her checked in, stuff up the flights of stairs, lunch, trip to Home Depot, trip to Walmart, etc. She was ready for us to leave and we were ready to get out of there. I was too tired to cry.
We’ve already decided that Kiddos 2 & 3 are bringing less stuff 
DH and I both dropped off D. Her roommate’s parents and sister came, too, so the room was a little crowded, ha! Afterwards, DH and I went to an amusement part and had a great time. 
I’d ask what the kid prefers and work toward that. W and I both dropped off both of our daughters, but we decided to make a little family vacation of it on the way there. In D1’s case we figured it might be one of the last times the four of us got to do a road trip together as a family, something we’d always enjoyed. So instead of heading straight to the college in the Philadelphia area we swung up through Montreal and Quebec City then down through northern New England. We had a grand time, but by drop-off day D1 was ready to be rid of us, so it made the drop-off easier. When it was D2’s turn to start college a few years later, she demanded “her” road trip, so that time we headed to Toronto—not with our traditional foursome, but it made for a special bonding time and rite of passage for the “baby of the family.” Those were precious moments. In both cases we got pretty nice hotels near the college for the night before drop-off, and got in early enough to have a nice final restaurant meal together that evening, knowing that at drop-off the college wants you to be efficient in unloading and be gone.
It really depends on college and family. Our eldest school had activities and info sessions for families as part of the first two days of orientation. Our D had a lot of stuff to haul on the airplane and once we got there. Hubby and I both went with her a few days early. Checked out the city. Enjoyed some time with just her. We left little brother at home because his school started at the same time. No regrets. Lots of full families from what we saw.
We aren’t totally sure yet with S heading to the same school (though eldest will have graduated.) We have a toddler that we can’t leave behind yet but at the same time, it’s just pricey to buy all those tickets (and she’s pretty useless at moving boxes lol.) is like to all go but we will see.
Just DH and me for my oldest. Too many issues with bringing the (not-so-) littles: they wouldn’t have fit in the car with the stuff, they had already started school themselves, and I think it would have been too stressful (not to mention too crowded in the dorm room). They came for Parents Weekend, which was much more pleasant and relaxed.
If it is affordable and feasible, I think it’s great when the whole family goes. The younger siblings can see the college kid in their new “native” habitat, and this can help them with the separation. But if going will be too difficult or expensive, it’s perfectly fine to send just one parent.
When our oldest child started college, both parents and her younger brother went. He was 16, and a high school junior. He loved it. You couldn’t tell the difference between him and an incoming freshman. He was wearing a Tintin t-shirt, and no fewer than six attractive young women approached him to chat him up about Tintin. He thought he was in heaven. He had never met a girl other than his sister who had any idea who Tintin was before. He decided then and there he was going to the same college, and he did.
(It’s not really necessary to have the whole family do a drop off. In fact, it’s awkward. 0-1 parents would have been fine.)
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Transportation: How are you getting there? Driving? Plane? Will there be room for everyone and stuff in the car?
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Availability: Can everyone make it due to work etc?
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Has the sibling seen campus before? Them coming helps them know where big brother/sister is going to be living.
My DH was on a business trip so I brought my other DD and my stepmom to help unload.
Don’t worry if you cry…they will live.
The entire family (me, H, younger-by-two-years’ sister) went for the drop-off of our older daughter at college in southern California. We flew to Las Vegas, rented a car, went to the Grand Canyon (and were suitably impressed), and then drove to the university. I’m so glad we did this because it turned out to be one of only two times that I visited that daughter’s university. (The other was graduation.) For D2, H and I drove her to the college, 4 1/2 hours from home.
One thing I remember about D1’s move into the residence hall was the invaluable assistance D2 gave, by folding all her sister’s clothing.
If it’s a choice between 2 parents at drop-off or being able to attend family weekend in October, I would go with the one-parent drop-off. Family weekend will give you a chance to connect with your college-student in a way that won’t be possible during the craziness of move-in.
I’m not a fan of the family weekend in October when the local hotels jack up the prices and the colleges are overly crowded. I think I’d go as a family for drop off, spend a couple of days in a local hotel, do the shopping and exploring the area together and then get out of dodge. And yes, then the tears.
Ask yourself
“Will I regret not going?”
“Will I regret going?”
As you answer those questions choose whichever will cause you the least regrets.
Both of the colleges our kids attended had a convocation for the families (with their students) around mid-day. Afterwards, they did a little ceremony in which the students went out one door, and the parents went out the other. As a pretense, the students had a “meeting” at their dorm or somewhere else. Parents could gather for a brief meet-up with other parents. But everything was done by mid-day.
In both cases, we got in our car and headed directly home. No checking in or checking up on the kids the next morning. In one case, this meant a 4 hour drive, in the other case a 13 hour drive. We did both without stopping except for gas and food.
In other words, don’t plan to hang around after the drop-off unless there’s a parent event of some kind. It’s time to let go.
My husband is flying up with S. My youngest will be 7 and in school. I took my son to visit the college in January. It’s husband’s turn to take a trip with our oldest.
For my eldest, both parents and her sister. We are a close family and she was moving across the country. We all needed to see her off. When my youngest leaves this year, it will only be her mother and I who drop her off. We are going to take eldest sister to youngest daughter’s summer orientation program though. I think it is good for the whole family yo be able to visualize where everyone is living.
Our drop is looking like this - I and DD will fly to the US. My brother and my father and I will drive her up to school a week later. Try to stop my dad from doing this…impossible! Needs his Mount Holyoke gear apparently. Guess it will be a three generation drop off!