Why don't lurkers post?

<p>Hmm....with the right of free speech comes the right to remain silent....I say people can do whatever they wish on this site: listen, speak, or both. I don't really see what the problem is.</p>

<p>I've had to take several months off since being worn out by the auditioning for music schools. I couldn't take the stress and decided I needed to catch my breach as child #2 starts the process again. Thankfully, no music aptitude at all--athlete, which is a totally different auditioning. But these boards are amazing for the bits of wisdom that you can utilize. Now I am back ready to talk.</p>

<p>some people lurk and don't post because they are involved in the proceess (admissions, counseling, etc.) i think people take for granted their confidentiality in forums like this.</p>

<p>I have been lurking a bit lately over in the Ivy forums. I find the suspense and drama of the EDs riveting! Don't want to intrude on the kids by posting there. If they need parental input, they come over here! :)</p>

<p>patient -- of course there is the right to remain silent -- I don't know if you noticed that this thread was inspired by bhg's thread. S/he apparently mistakenly believed that s/he was 'alone' and that his/her comments might not be welcome; obviously that was not the case, but who knows how many others have felt as s/he does, and simply felt there was no place for them. </p>

<p>In the responses to BHG's thread were several 'lurkers' who claimed wholehearted support for his/her pov, but commented that they hesitate to post, thus this thread. Choosing not to speak is one thing; feeling intimidated is another.</p>

<p>As many others have already posted, there is so much to be learned here, and I genuinely appreciate what I've learned from the many knowledgeable posters on this board. In my own brick-and-mortar community, I'm a regular expert. Here, though, I'm just a rank amateur. So for the most part, I leave the answering to those with more expertise than I have. I post when I have a specific question, when I feel I have something specific to add to a discussion, or when I can provide a concrete response to a question posed by a student or parent.</p>

<p>I don’t even have a kid applying to colleges now. I came here last spring, when my daughter was trying to make a decision about where to go and we needed advice. My younger one is just a freshman in high school now, but here I stay, quietly addicted.</p>

<p>There’s another dimension to tentativeness about posting that hasn’t been mentioned. (This point actually came up on a similar thread a while back, and I think it bears repeating.) On a website like this one (and probably many others) there’s an established community of regular posters who “know” one another well. Some newcomers, those who are naturally extroverted, are able to dive right in. For others who are a little more reticent, and I have to admit I fall into that category, there’s a slight feeling of being an interloper. Although I feel very happy for the successes and sad for the disappointments experienced by the parents on this board, it can be a bit daunting to post frequently. Some of us shy folks may never be able to participate much, and for others it may just take time to feel part of the group. But I think even those who never post at all should feel that they are welcome here –- and if they can help their own kids or other kids with what they learn, wonderful.</p>

<p>Dizzymom, I have followed both threads, and wrote a supportive note to BHG in the other one, thanks. I detected a bit of annoyance in some of the posts (not all, by any means) that people were reading threads but not participating, and I was just saying that it doesn't bother me because there are so many legitimate reasons for lurking and not posting. I lurk on another board, local sports one, that is so funny--it is all dominated by guys, many of whom I know, most of whom are overweight and in bad health and absolutely obssessed by the local high school sports scene. I never post as I would be SO out of place. For one thing, I can spell. 'nuff said.</p>

<p>I don't look or post much here any more because I am a " 'tween"--one happily in college, two several years away from the process (I am just trying to survive their moodiness right now!)--but I can help on some of the athletic recruiting stuff and a few other areas. When I see a catchy heading, I'll often breeze through the posts to see what's up, but very little of it applies to me/our family situation right now so I don't post much. And as a poster above rightly noted, we do tend to make "friends" here and that is primarily what keeps me coming back as I have no "issues" at the moment.</p>

<p>I, too, post occassionally, but not nearly as often as others. I have my areas of expertise that I feel comfortable with, but other than that I tend to keep my mouth shut. For the most part, I will post once or twice on a thread, but that is all. I figure, once I have said what I want, why keep posting? (Just don't get me started on music school admissions!) If someone asks a question or requires a followup, I will be happy to post again.</p>

<p>Another thing I have discovered is that thread titles don't always tell us what the post is really about. So I will often read a thread that I think is about one thing and find out that is really about something else. So I read, but don't post. And of course, there are the posters who are so much more eloquent than me and have already said what I was thinking, so why clutter up the thread?</p>

<p>I have determined after exhaustive research that all lurkers have stubby little fingers. This trait was first noted in historical texts chronicling the Athenean Senate. "Stubbacles", a contemporary of Socrates, was known to have "digital shortening". Little is known of his positions on important Athenean issues of the day as he remained virtually mute and motionless and was often mistaken for a piece of furniture on the Senate floor.</p>

<p>Reports of his death are understandably vague but most often include the possibility of poisoning by repeated applications of a lemon scented "polish". After the death of Stubbacles the remaining Senate members gave a solemn oath to speak their minds boldly. In honor of their almost completely forgotten comrade they began to call their oath a "Pledge", as no one could remember his name , only the method of his poisoning. </p>

<p>Substantial apocryphal evidence does exist that Stubbacles had valuable insights that would have improved the life of all Atheneans, possibly including a law banning all "Reality Stadium" programming . All lurkers appear to be the direct descendants of Stubbacles. Genetic testing will be necessary to prove this hypothesis conclusively and I am in the process now of applying to Poobah Berry for a grant to continue my research. I would appreciate your support.</p>

<p>curmudge, you crack me up. where do you come up with this stuff? i love your imagination.</p>

<p>I would like to see a thread consisting of Thedad and Curmudgeon developing this theory. If Thedad is in the mood to be funny, the two of them could have a truly marvelous time--and all of us would be lurking, not daring to interrupt the high class repartee!</p>

<p>As you must have figured out by now, I am the result of bad genetics, and a quick but confused mind, all merging with horrible teen-age choices to create a certifiably insane adult with several "channels" playing at once. But I am interesting. At least to myself. LOL.</p>

<p>Patient, I'm not sure the universe is ready for such a thing. As it is, I'm morbidly fascinated, because quite often when asked to give my vocation I will say "curmudgeon in-training" and now here is one that's already passed the tests.</p>

<p>The evidence about Stubbacles' performance in the Assembly is contradictory; indeed, the expression "to wax forth" seems to date to this time and though a connection to Stubbacles can be imputed, it can not be proved. What is almost a certainty, however, is that when Stubbacles was present in the Assembly, there was great concern over just as to who was minding the stoa. Stubbacles suffered a set-back in his youth that proved significant to the advancement and reputation of another figure, Demosthenes: in the Pythian games, Stubbacles lost a celebrated championship game of marbles to Demosthenes. As they played "keepers," Demosthenes won all the marbles but as the marble bag had not yet been invented, Demosthenes had litttle choice but to carry his winnings tucked inside his mouth, thus beginning his legend as an orator, though for years afterwards he could not say "Pythian" properly, provoking laughs from either "Thebes" or "thieves"...the record is not clear. Stubbacles also had unwitting influence on Greek drama when, after being assailed by some toughs from a Spartan gang, took his garments to a tailor and said, "Eumenides?", to which the tailor replied, "Euripides?" Stubbacles was a visionary who among other things strove to design a just and equitable system for handling airport baggage more than two millenia before powered flight. He was survived by two sons, Neurosis and Psychosis, and a daughter, Anorexia.</p>

<p>...and clearly, somewhere along the way, lost his marbles!</p>

<p>Ah---I now understand why Icarus did not bring carry-on luggage when he decided to fly (Air Olympia, departing Knossos from Window 4 at noon).</p>

<p>Anorexia? Why burden the poor girl with a name implying she weighed enough for two? 'Anorexis' would have fixed this problem...</p>

<p>(...this thread is rapidly degenerating... :-)</p>

<p>...no no, just beginning, in truth. I live for these types of threads that show how we are all going off our rockers.</p>

<p>going off our rockers: def.: losing our marbles while sitting in a rocking chair but imagining we can fly.</p>

<p>"Kunta, I foun' you!" Or "Doppleganger, is that you?" I can't decide . As Sybil would say,"I'm of two minds on this".</p>

<p>BTW TheDad -Euripides, Euminides? Who is minding the Stoa? Just and equitable system for handling airport baggage? That's quality work. Bravo.</p>

<p>I take my hat--I mean, my laurel wreath--off to the foregoing punster olympics. I must admit, however, it's all Greek to me.</p>