<p>Everybody at my school seems to be ultra-excited for graduation. I seem to be the only one who is not only unexcited but I'm also dreading graduation. The moment I walk across the stage will be the single worst point of my life so far. The few friends I have are all going off to university while I stay and go to a community college right across my high school. </p>
<p>My GPA and SAT score are not very high despite taking high level courses. It's not like I don't study. In fact, I rarely go out anywhere. My weekends consist of me watching youtube videos, awaiting facebook notifications in hopes somebody will talk to me, and occasionally playing Xbox (which I have not done very much lately since I have no money). I have a lot of free time and the classes themselves really aren't that difficult. Yet, for some reason, my grades aren't exactly the greatest. People who have horrible GPAs are also the ones who party. I get the worst out of both worlds: I neither have a social life nor do I have a solid GPA.</p>
<p>I also can't go to university. The system has screwed me over. I live with my mother who makes around $50,000 a year. Because of this, I won't get much money from finnacial aid (I have already applied and got a EFC of 4678. The only way I can possibly afford college is by taking out loans which even then I don't know if I can take out enough money since I'm only a freshman. I'm not in any organizations, don't have any activities, and I don't have anything about me that stands out enough for me to get scholarships.</p>
<p>And speaking of college another thing that has depressed me is the constant amount of people talking about their acceptance letters. The few schools that would accept me either had a bad reputation or don't have any programs that interest me. There is only one school in my state of Texas that interest me (UT Dallas and their ATEC program). However there is no guarantee everything will work out.</p>
<p>Pretty much everything about senior year has really sucked. Anytime I try to explain my feelings everybody tells me "Oh, cheer up! College is gonna be awesome!". This might sound silly but sometimes I feel like a red pill in the Matrix and everybody else a blue pill.</p>
<p>Am I the only one who feels this way or am I just a hipster?</p>
Sorry you’re feeling dismal, just remember you’re not at the end of the road yet</p>