<p>November 30, 2010
College. College, college, college. **** you, college. You've successfully managed to completely obliterate any capacity young people had for independent thought. It is all but impossible to eavesdrop on any group of high school students for any amount of time without hearing about college. It doesn't matter whether they are talking about the parties they're gonna go to, how many times they are gonna get laid per week, or deciding which Ivy has the strongest academics. Like people haven't been trying to decide that one for a while. Seriously, try eavesdropping on some teenagers next time you're at Starbucks or at the mall. You are bound to hear Harvard metioned more often than the Yankees (okay, maybe not during baseball season).</p>
<p>Okay, I admit this rant was caused by the looming prospect of taking my first standardized test. Yes, in exactly 11 days, 9 hours and 6 minutes, I shall be taking the ACT. It seems to have become a rite of passage, your first standardized test. The College Board (a heart-felt **** You to them too, and God forbid this is, by some miracle, ever published in any way, shape, or form, 'cause I'd probably find myself banned from any respectable institution of higher learning in no time) seems to think it is perfectly alright to charge a kid something close to 90 dollars for the RIGHT to take a test that will decide whether you are worthy of going to a respectable college. And you know, having a sticker with their name on your bumper. Nevermind that most kids take both the ACT and the SAT multiple times. Nevermind that they also charge you 87 dollars a piece for AP exams. And I'm taking 4. Thats 348 dollars for those of you who can't add (Lord knows I just had to use a calculator for that). 348 dollars for what is basically a bunch of paperwork. And then colleges charge close to 100 dollars each for the right to fill out an application. No refunds if you don't get in. And if you're a part of the majority, you probably won't. I don't really know how these things work, but that doesnt sound very fair to me, because I doubt very many families have the amount of money needed to undertake all the college-related costs high school students have to pay. Sure, everyone in my school can afford it. We live comfortably in the suburbs of NY. But what about inner-city kids? What about kids from poorer states? What about minorities? It seems to me the system is all but designed to help the privileged get into college in spite of their perhaps equally talented under-privileged counterparts.</p>
<p>I have never doubted the importance of education. As my father says, "Education is the wisest investment you can make". However, education should be about personal enrichment, and the betterment of the self. It should never be about power, prestige, a car sticker and a higher income. And in that way, and even though it's a cliche to say it, college does get in the way of education in its purest form. College has completely eliminated the thrill of acquiring new knowledge for the sake of acquiring it, and instead has substituted it with a bunch of numbers and statistics, to the point where it wouldnt surprise me to hear a teenager introduce themselves as "John Doe, Junior, 3.0 GPA, 2100 SAT score". No longer is school about taking classes you like, joining sports you are good at, getting a job and going to Prom, with maybe some community service thrown in. Now it all boils down to "What's going to look better in my college application?". This has become a world of SAT tutors and guidance counselors, and writing coaches and admissions officers, and I honestly want no part of it, but I will still go to Dobbs Ferry High School on December 11th and do my very best to get the best possible score on the ACT, and when I'm done with them I'll go college visiting and I'll fall in love with one place, the way the students all look so smart and applied, and the way that pretty girl over there is smiling at me, and the way the leaves fall just so on the dirt path, and I'll apply to that one dream school, maybe even early-decision, and I'll jump with joy if I get word that yes, indeed, they would like to have me. And I will do this because, in some ways, I'm even worse than my college-crazed classmates, because I recognize the wrongness of it all, and I think I want no part of it, I say it to myself, try to force myself to believe it, the spitefulness of it all.</p>
<p>If i find out that I didnt do as well as i hoped I would do 11 days from now, I wont think of it as a world-ending event. It wont be the kind of Apocalypse Now failure would mean for some classmates, even some of my friends. I would try to learn from it, draw lessons from it, and move on. And if no college decides I'm worthy of their institution, then (and I'll say it like this because, in some occassions, one swear word says more than the most eloquent speech) **** them, I don't need no stinkin' college to succeed. Who even decides who is successful and who isn't? Is there some kind of higher power that goes "Oh, you went to Princeton? Please sir, come this way, and let me kneel before you while I'm at it" and "Oh no, you went to SUNY Purchase? Tsk, tsk, I'm afraid you;re not successful". Hell, I can move to Maine and become a lumberjack, and if I can make a decent living and buy a house, even if it's not that big, and (just maybe, and far into the future) marry a good woman and raise good kids, I'll consider myself successful. That's success, buddy, and no one can say that the cold-hearted lawyer from Harvard who lives in a loft in Manhattan's upper west side is more successful than me.</p>