Would anyone like to review my DBQ thesis?! Thanks! :D

Pre-College Issues High School Life
1

<p>Hi there,</p>

<p>I'm writing a DBQ right now for homework on the Russo-Turkish War. The question is:</p>

<p>Analyze the various views of British leaders about the Eastern Question and the Russo-Turkish War of 1877-1878. </p>

<p>My thesis statement is:</p>

<p>"The British, as a result of seeing the Russians as a potential threat to the Suez Canal, mostly supported the Turks and therefore were actively involved in the war; however, other British leaders didn't want to get involved because they felt that Britain wasn't stable enough to engage in war." </p>

<p>My three groups are:</p>

<ol>
<li>Those who wanted to get involved in the war</li>
<li>Those who didn't want to get involved in the war </li>
<li>Those who just distantly hated the Turks </li>
</ol>

<p>In my thesis statement, should I include the third group that I listed or just stick with what I have?</p>

<p>Thank you soooo much, this is such a hard DBQ. Have a wonderful day, all of you.</p>

<p>Brooke</p>

2

<p>Don’t use contractions.</p>

3

<p>All right thanks, any other suggestions? :)</p>

4

<p>I think you could make it more concise. I’m not a very good writer but I’d probably say something like this, for example:</p>

<p>Although some British leaders viewed the Russians as a threat to the Suez Canal and were thus actively involved in the war, others refused to involve themselves because they viewed Britain as too unstable to successfully engage in war.</p>