You got to be kidding me!!!!

<p>adigal, you need to write the colleges a special circumstances letter explaining the circumstances of the check for back disability payments -- a one-time lump sum payment does not have to be treated as current income for FAFSA purposes, but this is in the discretion of each school and they won't know if you don't spell it out for them.</p>

<p>
[quote]
$100,000 income means you're very well off in certain parts or the country, or just making it in the northeast and CA

[/quote]
I live in the SF bay area and can't even conceive of making $100K -- $55K is a good year for me -- and if I had $100K I would definitely be living high off the hog. I understand that it a lot more expensive to live here than, say, Kansas -- but I don't buy the "just making it" rationale. Keep in mind that median household income in these areas is still around $70K or so.</p>

<p>I agree with Trin SF that $30K would be undoable in this area. But there are things that can be done to cut costs, and there are some areas where we Californian's save, such as home heating costs.</p>

<p>Thanks, Calmom. I already emailed the financial aid officer, and I am going to write a letter with the explanation as well.</p>

<p>Very interesting & informative thread.</p>

<p>Last night I went to a financial planning meeting at our HS. I now share the pain/shock of other posters! <big headache=""></big></p><big headache="">

<p>I'm trying, trying to deal w/frustration at son (haven't expressed it) for chosing to get Cs his 9th & 10th grade years (not bothering to work), thereby effectively shutting the door to almost all merit aid (despite high SATs & As in current, 11th grade year). </p>

<p>Our bind is also our own fault for putting other priorities before funding more of son's college fund (e.g. mom staying at home w/infant/young child instead of working).</p>

<p>It's hard enough for parents of kids who've worked hard all through HS facing all these financial pressures/burdens. </p>

<p>Wondered if anyone else had the student who didn't work during the early part of HS & how they dealt w/the financial ramifications? I don't want to punish or get angry now that son is finally on the bandwagon of good grades but the more I learn about merit aid, etc., the sadder/madder I get...! </p>

<p>Also--does anyone know when parents take out loans--do both parents have to sign for them? </p>

<p>Thanks....!!!</p>
</big>

<p>PS I guess might be one of the few parents here dealing w/the 'less-than-stellar' gpa issue....that's probably going to skew the whole aid/application process as compared to what most here have dealt with...</p>

<p>"Our bind is also our own fault for putting other priorities before funding more of son's college fund (e.g. mom staying at home w/infant/young child instead of working)."</p>

<p>Finally, someone who actually admits the problem. We set our priorities as we set them - if you choose a big house and cars and vacations and private schools, designer jeans, limos at prom, etc well, guess whta, you chose them. If you chose not to go to college, or to do crappy in HS and couldn't get into college, or whatever - you chose that path, noone else.</p>

<p>Why don't people just buck up and tell their kids "I chose this path and you get to be the recipient of it" instead of whining and blaming everyone around you that it's too expensive or blah blah blah.</p>

<p>There are indeed instances where disaster has struck, kids are left out in the cold, etc and they need and deserve help. But really, the whining gets really old for us middle class folks who have saved and saved to give our kids an education with little or no debt. Sorry - you reap what you sow.</p>

<p>Jolynne -</p>

<p>I'm dealing w/ a related situation. D is an average student (B's and C's, w/ the very occasional A); she'll go to college, just not the same caliber of sch as her older sibs.</p>

<p>And, while C's will probab put your S out of the running for merit aid, there are plenty of schools that will offer some merit money to a boy w/ less than stellar numbers: Case, Wooster, Goucher, Bennington to name a few. Search for earlier threads on this topic, but I think the rule of thumb is 2nd tier colleges - - especially former women's colleges anxious/struggling to achieve gender balance.</p>

<p>3togo;
"For us each $2500 we save allows us to retire a month earlier. So if we did have to pay $200,000 for a kid to go to a private school it would move out our retirement by 80 months for that child."</p>

<p>how did you figure that out? ? Is there a formula you colud share?</p>

<p>tbt--
Well, I suppose that's true. But, it doesn't change the fact that you have to navigate your current scenario as best as you can. I don't think that because you acknowledge that you haven't saved enough that you are necessarily 'whining' or 'blaming everyone around you.' You just do the best you can given your previous choices and make the most of your situation, accessing all available information. </p>

<p>As to the student who didn't do well in the first years of HS...it's not as simple as saying 'you did "crappy" in HS so you can't get into college, you chose that.' Often the student can get into a school (because of test scores or whatever) -- but it becomes a personal/financial decision on the part of the parents as to whether to go into a lot of debt to fund a lower-level, 4-year educational experience. </p>

<p>That same dilemma re: HS performance and college funding could also have arisen even if the parents had saved $90k and did without for years -- would you want to pour all that painfully saved money into the education of a student who will give you a double or triple the cost price-tag because they didn't work when they were 14/15 yrs old? That's a personal decision for each family and requires multi-level analysis and value-weighing. </p>

<p>Moreover, there is also the factor that if one spouse (say, the wage-earner) choses big house, big car, expensive vacation over college, there is not much the other spouse can do about that.</p>

<p>tbt -- actually, I don't think that "other priorities" are "the problem" so much as out-of-whack expectations. Not too long ago, the middle class was happy to be able to send their kids to state u. Now, some in the middle class (parents or children) expect the elite private LAC as some sort of a right. </p>

<p>And I agree with an earlier comment, that the real problem in society ISNT that the elite private college is out of reach for the middle class -- but that increasingly the state u isn't.</p>

<p>Jolynne and tbt12626, I had a totally different response to your comment about priorities. While I agree it was a choice with a long term impact, I have trouble using the word "fault" in the same sentence. Fault seems to imply you did something wrong, and I would be surprised if someone could show paying for college is a better investmant than staying at home with an infant/young child. I think it's a much "greyer" choice then the Lexus choice that puts any parents choices into better perspective.</p>

<p>BTW Jolynne, i bet your sons scenario is much more common than the college confidential kid scenario...</p>

<p>Foolishpleasure--thanks for the info and encouragement. I've looked on the website about colleges w/merit aid (& created a big Word doc w/all relevant posts). I'll definitely write down the schools you mentioned. </p>

<p>Community college is looking more favorable now for two years (our local CC has a joint program w/an extremely, locally well-regarded 4 year school for math/science--two years at the CC, then 2 at the good school -- you get the diploma & great co-op opportunities from the good school). </p>

<p>My hub wants son to have the '4 year experience' but it's going to require a lot of thought (& we are definitely looking at the second tier, as you mentioned). </p>

<p>Good luck to your daughter!</p>

<p>Edit: Shrinkrap--true, it's definitely grey! I just couldn't put that tiny infant/little girl in daycare...now I feel guilty, son is paying for that...but we'll see how it all plays out. Katliamom--State U is not out of our consideration, whatsoever. But their costs are often not that cheap, either, unfortunately!</p>

<p>We also found out the FAFSA numbers to be rather high for us to pay. S1 ended up choosing a school with very good merit money over the more expensive higher rated school and is very happy with his decision, so far. He even offered to sell his baseball card collection to help pay. (Little does he know he may need that for medical school tuition)</p>

<p>There are many of us who have not saved enough due to unexpected job losses, major medical expenses, ....that has been our case. But, you still manage to find a way.</p>

<p>Living simply and enjoying some things without huge price tags really helps. </p>

<p>S2 is one of the above average kids with his fair share of C's on the report card. He also has many A's and B's. He has found a couple of schools that are offering him scholarships for having a B average coupled with his outstanding community service record. The school he is planning on choosing uses the FAFSA but also considers the amount we are spending on sending our younger kids to Catholic school.</p>

<p>There are many good options out there that give merit and need based aid greater that the EFC amount figured on the FAFSA.</p>

<p>Jolynne -</p>

<p>A lot of top LACscolleges actively recruit CC grads as junior transfers.</p>

<p>(And I agree w/Shrinkrap - - no "fault" or anything wrong w/ the choices you described.)</p>

<p>Jolynne: We'll you're not alone in dealing with the GPA thing. I have one child who always got all A's and had no problem getting into colleges and getting great aid, but another who works very hard but struggles to make B's, and has gotten at least one C every semester. I am very concerned that her options won't be as good as her brother's were. She will be applying mostly to art schools, but I worry a lot about grades and opportunities and money.</p>

<p>Jolynne, I've got one of those kids, too. Are you concerned about his ability to succeed in college? Do you think he has turned the corner? Southern schools can be very cost effective - the publics are cheap, and merit money tends to be based on test scores more than grades. Southern private schools have to compete hard for students, so the merit bar is lower - some of these schools can give an excellent experience.</p>

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<p>Certainly was true when I went to college decades ago. Almost all of the 4 year-college going crowd either went to the local large private university or the not very far away large state university.</p>