Why do we allow college admissions offices to shape and pass judgment on our children's character?

No, people don’t want a “name”. People want a solid education for their kids and good job prospects. This is why you try to squeeze into a good school district - the teachers are better, the students are more motivated, there are more choices of high quality classes. There are public elementary schools not far from where I live where grades are combined and the older kids teach the younger kids.
Same with college - as everything in the US from food to healthcare, the quality is uneven, there is a lot of marketing and you need to do your research to make sure you are not eating garbage.

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