My son is an introvert, and CA class sizes of 30 were an absolute nightmare for him. No teacher knew him, and he was bored in todays classroom setups. He refused to do any homework. His mom was at her wits end, but I told her to calm down, that the environment was all wrong for him. At the end of Sophomore year, I had him take the ACT as I wanted to know if he was struggling or he was putting one over on the teachers. He scored a 24 on the ACT as a sophomore. The school system kicked him out of the mainstream school, and he attended the alternative high school. Due to his ACT score, he completed high school in 3.5 years. He began to attend Montana State where he has been deans list every semester for two years straight. His GPA was 3.7 as a business major with straight A’s in all business classes. He recently got his acceptance as a transfer student to Boston College.
So my advice to all parents with sons who struggle in todays female oriented learning environment, don’t stress it. He will come around, unless he is actually struggling to absorb the information being taught him. The male brain kicks in late, but when it kicks in, he will strive and accelerate, and all your worries will be absolved. Let him be, encourage him, and don’t wreck his confidence early. Good luck to all parents with boys in this day and age.
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Can you explain what you mean by a female-oriented school environment in a high school? Not trying to start an argument, just genuinely curious
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My kids (different genders) found HS exceedingly male oriented- both the learning environment and the social/EC scene.
I respect your experience (and wish your son all the luck as he moves ahead) but this is by no means universal.
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My only guess based on his post is perhaps more socially oriented? As an introvert, large classes are not ideal. (and an ACT score of 24 regardless of what grade in hs is not high, its average so not sure how it correlated).
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While your son sounds like he was a typical kid that wasn’t engaged, that in no way is due to a “female-oriented” educational setting. I had kids of both genders in school at the same time. While my son definitely needed something different, it was not due to his gender. In fact, I wish I had moved my daughter as well. The setting I moved him to met all his needs. As it did the females in his class who also were not getting their needs met in other settings.
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Given the historical - and sadly frequently contemporary - sexism within the education system, I would very much push back against this.
Now, if you were to argue that extroverts have certain advantages in school and the workplace, yes, that’s probably so. But that is not a gender issue.
School does require some some maturity to manage time and meet deadlines and I realize that girls are considered to mature faster than boys, but we also see many, many excellent male high school students so that clearly is not always a hinderance.
So, if anything, there may be personality issues that affect how well/poorly one does. To a lesser degree, maturity issues. But to argue that educational spaces in this country favor girls is a bit of stretch to my mind.
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To bad this was broached as a gendered issue when the real issue seems to be finding an educational setting that is engaging. Good for you for considering alternatives and addressing the engagement issue and letting him figure it out as he matured. And congrats to your son for his hard work.
I truly believe a big part of success is improved executive functioning + engagement+ agency+ figuring things out on your own with a good safety net.
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Feel free to deny high school isn’t female oriented. Quote from The Atlantic. “American colleges and universities now enroll roughly six women for every four men . This is the largest female-male gender gap in history”, and this was a quote from 2021. I’m only here to encourage others with struggling male students that there could most definitely be a good student there, don’t give up on them. Not interested in hearing that his ACT score was average or any other snipes thrown my way.
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