“I don’t think I will have tips to share though. My girls and their fiancees are doing ALL the planning themselves.”
@soozievt That’s a very good tip in itself! Have fun!
The photographers at my kids’ weddings asked for a list of family VIPs and desired group photos a week before the dates. It was very helpful to not have to think about this once the festivities began.
It’s reassuring to stash a little emergency kit with a sister or bff - safety pins, little sewing kit, bobby pins, blotting papers, nail file, tylenol, imodium, tampons, mints, etc.
The best advice I can give is to just relax and enjoy. Once you leave the house for the rehearsal, realize that most everything is now out of your control, so no sense wasting energy on worrying. Trust that you have planned to the best of your ability. If you are relaxed and festive, your guest will be, too. Chances are that something may go awry, but chances are that only the MOB and MOG will really know. Don’t sweat the small stuff and remember to eat!
Congrats to all the upcoming wedding families!
At my nephew’s wedding, they had a wedding planner there to take care of emergencies. My kids asked for bug spray because it was outdoor, and the wedding planner had it. 
At the wedding, it was announced any requests were to go to the wedding planner not the parents.
They also asked guests to contribute their photos to a site so they could all share, but unfortunately there were very few pictures of my sister and her H.
Thinking of Missypie today and hoping that the entire family has a wonderful, wonderful day at her son’s wedding!!!
Best wishes to @missypie …await the wedding report.
The wedding was beautiful and personal and the reception was fun. No major problems. The bride looked ethereal. Her dress (from a sample house) was perfect for her. Everyone loved it. The ceremony was at our church with our former organist, with the bride’s pastor. DIL’s “people” were very impressed with our beautiful gothic church and pipe organ; our “people” were very impressed with the pastor. The fabulously talented organist (who is also a friend of the family) pretty much arranged the bride’s processional just for us and no one could have done a better job. A lot of folks stayed until the very end of the reception, which is a complement. The MOB had some very good friends helping her with details.
The next post will be “lessons learned.”
Looking forward to “lessons learned”. DS’s wedding in Aug 7.
Here are my random thoughts, advice and warnings:
The most stressful thing about the whole weekend was getting everyone to the rehearsal, rehearsal dinner, church and reception venue…who rides with whom, when to arrive, who is lost, etc etc etc. I sent our side of the rehearsal dinner attendees a map and address by email, and the address was in the welcome bag, but two families still went to the wrong restaurant. Folks got lost on the way to the reception. It was very helpful that younger D was willing to drive folks around at a moment’s notice. I ended up driving the car of a drunk young woman back to our house from the reception. (The young crowd ended up at our house for late night drinks and pizza; Uber took them back to their hotel.)
I really don’t have a good way to solve the problem of folks not being able to find a venue when they have the name, address and a map. Maybe on the outside of the welcome bag, tie a large card with the names and addresses of venues, the time everything starts, etc in very dark type. I think that some folks didn’t look in their welcome bags.
The bride’s two attendants didn’t have a good grasp of their duties. It wasn’t really my place to tell them that it was their job to schlep some of the bride’s stuff around and they didn’t do a great job at it. After everyone but H and I had left the church, I ended up with the bride’s purse to take to the reception. I didn’t mind at all, but the bride’s attendants really should have taken care of things like that. Not a big deal at all, but something to plan for.
If the wedding/rehearsal dinner is on your turf, make sure you have some food storage containers. Yesterday I was able to send loads of food back with the bride and groom and pretty much cleaned out my supply of old cool whip containers.
Only three of the borrowed vases escaped the reception venue. That’s better than I expected.
Finally, ladies, it’s sad to have to say this, but watch your purses. Older D had $60 taken from her purse. Her cute little evening purse was sitting on the table in the bride’s room, in clear view. The money didn’t fall out because the three one dollar bills that were with the three 20 dollar bills were still there. We are 99% sure that the maid of honor’s sketchy BF took the money. He was hanging out in the bride’s room while the girls were out having pictures taken. Not a huge loss, but be on your guard even when you don’t think you need to be.
Overall, it was a great event.
^ thank you for tips will be Mog - July 9
And, I’m certain the transportation to church. and then shuttle to receptions will be the issue at son’s wedding. The hotel manager was very vague about how shuttles work when they have multiple weddings, which they have for son’s weddjng.
And, I’d like to share something my sister Banquet sales Manager has encountered at two places she worked. Wedding gift cards can be stolen, sadly, by staff both times. So be sure those cards are In safe place ! I mention this after reading about theft at missypie’s weddjng
Congrats Missypie. I’m glad it went well.
My friend mentioned that she had been told by the event planner that thievery is an issue at wedding receptions especially when the two sides don’t know each other’s guests well. It’s easy for thieves to crash the party. And many leave purses unattended or suit coats.
Also it was suggested to her that they have someone stay at their house during the wedding. I guess robbery can happen if a thief knows the house is unattended. Same was suggested to her for the bride and groom while on the honeymoon. A apartment or house full of gifts.
@missypie I was at a wedding a few years ago. A very proper, conservative, prosperous family with one bad apple. Let’s call him uncle Bob. Who just got out of prison. While the entire wedding party was assembled on the grand stair case of the “palatial” home for a group shot. The photographer asked “okay everybody here?” At that point someone asked, where’s Bob? In a microsecond the entire party got an utter look of horror and immediately dashed into the house.
Where, you guessed it, they had left Bob alone with the purses.
That sudden look of horror and mad dash was the funniest thing I had ever seen.It happens with the best of families. They all still laugh about it and they all still keep an eye out for Bob.
At my own wedding 29 years ago, several of our guest’s cars were broken into at the church and presents stolen.
No one told it about us until my mom let it slip years later. After I questioned my friends about it, they still refused to to admit it happened, wanting to protect my feelings!
Glad to hear the wedding went well.
Re theft at weddings: I was a guest at a wedding at a very upper crust and snobby Pasadena county club and my iPhone was stolen by a member of the staff. It happened in minutes; I had been showing someone pictures on my phone at the table; left my phone on the table while getting up for the cake cutting; and it was gone when I returned less than five mins later. The phone had been fully charged and on when I left the table; when I tried to locate it thru Find My IPhone 5 minutes later, there was no trace of it; whoever had taken it had turned it off. The management at the country club did not handle the incident well; they basically accused me of “losing” the phone.
Yep it does - There were one or two of them at my sister in law’s wedding many years ago. I hadn’t even given it any thought until I saw my MIL quietly instructing one of the adult cousins to take charge of the bridal party’s purses during the ceremony. When she realized I had overheard she said, “Just removing temptation, dear”. And I knew in that moment she was absolutely right…
I am realizing that no one really took pictures at the rehearsal dinner. I took a few beforehand mostly of the decor but that would have been the perfect time to get pix of family members in a relaxed setting. (I am very glad that the dinner was super casual and that everyone felt free to mingle.). I consciously didn’t take a bunch of pictures so I could enjoy the event.
So the tip is that if you don’t have your wedding photographer there, ask someone from each family to take pictures. That would be a good job for a bored teen.
Missypie, love your recap and so happy things overall went well! How do you think the bride and groom survived it all?
Great tip about photos at the rehearsal.
We are 3 1/2 weeks away - a little bit of me is going to be glad when it’s over!
Thanks for all the tips Missypie. I’m so happy the wedding went beautifully and now you can bask in the afterglow!
I’m still in the waking up in the middle of the night thinking of everything that needs to be done stage. We are 4 1/2 weeks away and I’m finally going to take the tags off the dress I’m wearing and getting it altered.
I honestly am going to feel like I am on vacation all summer, with “only” my full time lawyer job to handle.
The couple did great. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this but many of you probably know from other threads that Son has Aspergers and was stressed about being “on” for a whole day. He did a great job and at least didn’t seem like he wanted to hide out at any time.
@missypie What were your favorite “surprises”. What unexpectedly warmed your heart? :x
So glad almost everything went off without a hitch, @missypie pie. Sorry about the $$ :((
Excited to hear there are many nuptials upcoming, and awaiting sooze’s report back on wedding #1.
Its hard to believe DS#1s wedding was almost a year ago!! Biggest snafu was that the shuttles, despite reviewing the calendar and schedules multiple times and all paid for in advance, failed to show to provide transportation to the Sunday brunch. That led to a lot of last minute jockeying and picking people up.
The only other snafu/warning— tell the couple , if they are staying at a nice hotel bridal suite or whatever on the night after all events are complete, to check to be sure that there is not a corporate team-building event with lots of blaring music and yelling going on all night in the room next door! (I kid you not).