For those looking to do a selfie photo booth, Etsy can be a good source for finding the props (actually a good source for a lot of unique, handcrafted wedding items).
As mentioned above, DS and wife had really pretty burlap bags with snacks, etc for all the guests… The information about transportation, things to do, etc was on their website and guests had been advised of this previously.
For bride that wants a formal rehearsal dinner event; I would arrange something at the hotel for other out of town guests where everyone or almost everyone is staying. Our SIL/brother didn’t have a formal rehearsal dinner - instead all out of town family were invited to the pot luck style dinner that was catered in - used the main hotel area that was a sitting/coffee area normally. Since our young DDs were having fun with other relatives/friends, I was able to actually have a very meaningful talk with H’s great aunt who was in her 90’s at the time (she also was part of the ‘Nun Study’ -Sisters of Notre Dame that were studied for their life longevity - Sister Anne lived to be a few months short of 108). Since MIL/FIL will be at the bride’s formal dinner event, I would look to see what could be arranged and who is willing to ‘take charge’ of this secondary event (of course getting bride/groom approval).
Anyone have a critique for this list?
http://www.weddingideasmag.com/mother-of-the-bride-to-do-list/
Looking at some of these items, I thought would be responsibility of bride/groom. But maybe being on the list will have me ‘included’.
Bought two Bride magazines - one was state specific for 2016. If either has a tip or two, it is worth the $$. I want to read through the articles.
What about “Pay for the wedding?”
@SOSConcern That list accurately reflects what my own mother did when I got married 30 years ago in my early 20s. Wedding was in my hometown and I was living a 10 hour drive away. Mom and I talked about and agreed on most choices but she executed most of them.
I think it can be different these days as brides are often older and the bride and groom often pay for all or part of their weddings. In my day, my parents paid and they were truly the hosts that day.
Honestly, I wish I could just hand money over, but DD1 just isn’t as competent with these kind of things as DD2 (who will be her Maid of Honor, thank goodness). I will have more time out of the 3 of us, but DD1 does have good leads on many things in her city. Future SIL is a go-along guy, just like my H is.
Will meet groom’s mother Thanksgiving, and will find out what is important to her. Interesting family dynamics - other son is ‘covering’ Christmas with parents, while we plan to visit WI family. I see some behaviors from groom’s parents similar to what H and I had from our parents - and we will not be that way. Make it easy for them to have their own lives once married. Even after our parents were retired, we were always expected to travel to spend vacation/holiday time w/o our own time - and that included driving 100 miles Christmas morning from one set of parents to the other.
There are 17 items on the list; I’ve been a MOB twice and have done maybe 5 of those things. I presume that “organizing the buttonholes for key members of the wedding party” means making sure boutonnieres are distributed to the right people? Someone else must have thought this was his/her job because I never saw a boutonniere unless some guy was already wearing it.
“Making sure all the guests have got somewhere to stay that night” is fine, as long as that means making hotel information available and possibly booking a block of rooms at an attractive rate. I don’t think it’s the MOB’s job to go beyond that. I did make hotel reservations for elderly relatives when my older daughters got married, because they were elderly and relatives, but wouldn’t have worried about it for anyone else. (I wouldn’t expect the MOB to think about where I’m going to stay when I’m a guest, ether.)
Well, I just had two daughters get married, one as recently as a week ago. Each of them, along with their respective spouses, did all the planning themselves. Yes, I paid. I don’t think I did hardly anything on that list for Mother of the Bride. I would have if asked, but my kids competently did everything on their own with their partners. My younger D did ask me to craft a guestbook as she knew I have made handmade books before and she asked the groom’s mom to make the place cards. But that was about it. I did go with D2 to look for the wedding gown, but more out of the fun of that experience. My kids lead very busy lives but were able to handle every arrangement themselves and their weddings came out just as they had hoped. D1 got married out of town (where neither of us live). D2 got married in the city she lives in, but I don’t.
Yes, back in the day when I got married 39 years ago, it was in my hometown where I did not live (I was still in college in another city) and while I discussed all the details with my parents, they took care of most of the arrangements. I was just 20 years old and I think things are different today, plus my kids were older brides than I was and also did not getting married in their hometowns.
I had to double check and make sure this was from this decade!
Chasing it up?? I think this means the invitations, but I’m really not sure. We saw our daughters invitation when ours arrived at our house. I’m a bad Mom. I didn’t and won’t be doing at least half that stuff.
When I married, in 1985, I did virtually everything on this list and my mother did none of it. (Some of it neither of us did.) I was 33. She was unusually disengaged, though.
I think the idea of an ornament shower is really quite good - getting their friends together and can really be low cost but very meaningful. Has anyone done, and how about the timing? Availability of ornaments right around December for sure. We would have to get busy on that one - maybe have the event sometime in January?
This wedding is more about the bride/groom/their friends and immediate families than H and mine were - my dad owned a business in a small town, and H’s family had a ton of relatives within 100 miles of my home town. The couple is thinking what is important to them, and we can support as they want us to.
@snowball we had the same problem about people not RSVPing, with stamped envelope and easy return card to fill out. It was ‘guess’ who was coming and who was not - thankfully we had a restaurant that was charging us for how many came. Oh, aunt/uncle not only brought all their kids, but they brought future SIL - this cousin is a sweetie - she was young - but the parents did lack the manners (can be said for a lot of H’s family sadly). The lack of RSVP was really on that side of the invites too.
BIL’s wedding, they needed the exact count; turns out a cousin squeezed in a wedding date two weeks before in another state (and BIL’s wedding required a lot of family travel too) - so many relatives (aunts/uncles) went to the first wedding; this was really stinky - and this cousin was almost like a sister to BIL - sad to say, neither marriage lasted. Bride’s family (of BIL) said they cut people from their list they could have invited as it turned out…
Were the cousins not invited? How many were there? (And what did the invitation say?)
Don’t have daughters so that article is not terribly relevant, but the first thing I thought when I clicked on the link is dint ever wear a hat like that MOBs hat- ever!
I think that magazine dug up that to-do list from a 1982 issue! What does this even mean?!:
“Ordering the stationery and chasing it up” - what is “chasing it up”? They mention that twice!
“Collect the photo proofs from the photographer while you are on honeymoon” - photo proofs? Isn’t most everything digital now???
Toss the list - have the B and G make their own list of what they would like help with. 
Maybe the brides cousins came up with that list. It does sound like its decades old.
I think my kids would kill me if I saw the wedding photos before they did. Not happening.
We’re talking about first dances and father daughter dance music. Open for suggestions! If it was MY wedding, I would choose Sara Berellis, “I choose you” for a first dance. Of course, this will be our daughters decision, but she doesn’t have anything in mind yet. The dad/daughter can’t be anything along the lines of daddy’s little girl.
Your D should think about if she wants something really sentimental, something that evokes a memory for them, something fun and upbeat - or something that is somehow a combo of all three! That might help to narrow things down. Also maybe if it’s important to her if the song is more current or not.