A Better Chance Program - Middle Grades

I absolutely see it as something about which we are proud! I tell lots of others about the program and the things it has done for my son. Even after placement they stay working with the students. At school, I don’t think it really comes up for my son. Perhaps it’s different for girls, but the boys (particularly the athletes like my son) don’t care how you got there, just how well you can play! He’s fitting in perfectly and has lots of friends.

@Momto4kids Thanks for your response. Since I am not certain if we will match I am waiting until that time before announcing it. My D has to get in and then it has to be financially feasible. For 6th grade and in our area we are limited so hoping she becomes a scholar but being cautious. I am so glad to hear your S is doing well and enjoying it.

It’s a source of pride in our house too. While I understand that my daughter may not end up with a school through ABC, I can’t take from her the effort that she’s put into the process. Some people will always see it as affirmative action and that’s ok – over these past months I’ve seen first hand just how much our kids have had to go through to get to the same spot as the next kid. They SHOULD be proud!!!

As a mom of two scholars, one current cohort member and a placed student, that have gone through the process and both had their top choice for school referrals ignored, I strongly caution you to be proactive in managing the referral process. The first time, I called our preferred school immediately after the referring committees failed to forward our application and got our application in in the nick of time to get financial aid. If we did not catch the dropped ball, our child would be on a different educational trajectory TODAY and not a future legacy at an elite boarding school right now! Recently, our current cohort child’s top choice was purposely ignored in lieu of a school we never visited, asked about and are disinterested in. Our local ABC contact said there was no mistake, that they made referrals based on our child’s profile and that we can apply on our own to our top choice. Fortunately, we may not have to apply independently because the school admissions lady at our child’s top choice is requesting our child’s application and I can’t imagine our local ABC office saying no they won’t forward our child’s application at the school’s request. My loyalty is to my children. My priority is not pointing out mistakes but rather ensuring my child does not miss out on rich opportunities lost in the admissions shuffle. Such mistakes are too costly and there is no room for error when it comes to referrals. Be on watch and contact the schools directly to keep the wheels of your child’s future in motion instead of leaving it in the hands of referring committee employees who never met your kid and care more about proving their referral right than finding the best school for your child based on the preferences of those who know your child best–your child and you! When you feel in your gut your child is overlooked for a school that they love and are a great fit for, it is time to speak up and not be polite and take whatever you get. Ideally, ABC will not get defensive about referral mishaps and focus on the solution. Just accept that some ABC personnel will be spiteful in having their mistakes called out. That said, I lean on the understanding that we are all adults and that it is possible to communicate with ABC diplomatically about botched referrals then contact the schools directly to reach out for your child’s application and get what you wan & what is best for the student. BE EMPOWERED!

Now, I appreciate the work does but acknowledge sometimes they get the referrals wrong and that sometimes their employees do not know as much as the parents who have researched and visited the schools. The ABC people are not there when your child is in the admissions director’s office making them laugh and impressing them with their intelligence, drive and and wit. So many factors influence admission decisions and in person school visits is one of the strongest. A shy child on paper can come alive on the right campus as they discuss labs and programs with their tour guide/host and envision themselves flourishing in various classrooms, clubs and sports. This is what the ABC referring committees miss and can’t articulate when making their referrals. This is exactly where parents must be their child’s biggest advocates!

The first time our top and only choice was ignored, an ABC contact explained the mixup as a function of not having many options for single sex, 7th grade boarders, however, we had done our research and knew that our preferred school accepted 7th grade girls. Parents should not be educating ABC teams on ABC member schools yet, unfortunately, that’s what we must do at times. We are told that we should trust the process and that sometimes our choices will be disregarded, however, everybody’s wrong sometimes, including ABC. I operate on spirit, intuition, and what feels right when my children visit campuses not what someone who judges my kid based on what they see on paper.

I believe it means your application had been sent to those listed schools.

As a mom of two scholars, one current cohort member and a placed student, that have gone through the process and both had their top choice for school referrals ignored, I strongly caution you to be proactive in managing the referral process. The first time, I called our preferred school immediately after the referring committees failed to forward our application and got our application in in the nick of time to get financial aid. If we did not catch the dropped ball, our child would be on a different educational trajectory TODAY and not a future legacy at an elite boarding school right now! Recently, our current cohort child’s top choice was purposely ignored in lieu of a school we never visited, asked about and are disinterested in. Our local ABC contact said there was no mistake, that they made referrals based on our child’s profile and that we can apply on our own to our top choice. Fortunately, we may not have to apply independently because the school admissions lady at our child’s top choice is requesting our child’s application and I can’t imagine our local ABC office saying no they won’t forward our child’s application at the school’s request. My loyalty is to my children. My priority is not pointing out mistakes but rather ensuring my child does not miss out on rich opportunities lost in the admissions shuffle. Such mistakes are too costly and there is no room for error when it comes to referrals. Be on watch and contact the schools directly to keep the wheels of your child’s future in motion instead of leaving it in the hands of referring committee employees who never met your kid and care more about proving their referral right than finding the best school for your child based on the preferences of those who know your child best–your child and you! When you feel in your gut your child is overlooked for a school that they love and are a great fit for, it is time to speak up and not be polite and take whatever you get. Ideally, ABC will not get defensive about referral mishaps and focus on the solution. Just accept that some ABC personnel may be spiteful in having their mistakes called out but hey that’s life. That said, I lean on the understanding that we are all adults and that it is possible to communicate with ABC diplomatically about botched referrals then contact the schools directly to reach out for your child’s application and get what you want & what is best for the student. BE EMPOWERED!

While I appreciate the work does, I acknowledge sometimes they get the referrals wrong and that sometimes their employees do not know as much as the parents who have researched and visited the schools. The ABC people are not there when your child is in the admissions director’s office making them laugh and impressing them with their intelligence, drive and and wit. So many factors influence admission decisions and in person school visits is one of the strongest. A shy child on paper can come alive in a one-on-one interview and on the right campus as they discuss labs and programs with their tour guide/host and envision themselves flourishing in various classrooms, clubs and sports. This is a vital thing the ABC referring committees misses and can’t articulate when making their referrals. This is exactly where parents must be their child’s biggest advocates!

The first time our top and only choice was ignored, an ABC contact explained the mixup as a function of not having many options for single sex, 7th grade boarders, however, we had done our research and visit and knew that our preferred school accepted 7th grade girls. Parents should not be educating ABC teams on ABC member schools yet, unfortunately, that’s what we must do at times. We are told that we should trust the process and that sometimes our choices will be disregarded, however, everybody’s wrong sometimes, including ABC. I operate on spirit, intuition, and what feels right when my children visit campuses not what someone who judges my kid based on what they see on paper.

@bigleagues it’s a little difficult for me to gauge from your post if you’re angered by, or appreciate ABC. Can I ask why you only had one school choice initially in the process? Also, from my understanding we’re more than free to apply to any schools that we’re not referred and simply expressing an interest doesn’t guarantee a referral. The way I feel, ABC doesn’t owe us anything, especially for the price we pay for the service!

My anger or gratitude is not the point of my post. To answer your question, I am grateful for ABC and my family pours back into ABC through volunteering. This should not suggest ABC & the referral process are beyond assessment of where improvements could be made (hopefully, without defensiveness).

Parents sharing experiences is how parents can empower other parents. I offered my family’s experience. If our experience helps at least one parent on this thread feel more empowered to advocate for their child’s referral requests when they feel their preferences are ignored, my post will not be in vain. Constructive criticism is how organizations improve processes.

I am well aware that we are free to apply independently to schools we are not refererred to and I am prepared to do so, however, our experience affirms the fact that this would not be necessary in some cases if the referring committees trusted ABC families’ choices for referrals in the same way we are asked to trust the process. This is a reasonable expectation. Trust is a two-way street! I believe most ABC placements work out for the best but sometimes they don’t and these misplacements could possibly be minimized with higher regard for referral preferences. I believe placements work out for the child best when trust flows both ways between scholars’ families and the referring committee. Parents and scholars research schools before selecting them for referrals. We make visits, observations and know when a fit/connection is made. These insights are too important to deny in the referral process. Ignoring these insights can undermine confidence in the referral process and those involved, especially when referral requests are rejected and later pan out independently of ABC.

The first time we picked one school was because it was a good fit for our child and the only school that met our preference for academics, size, location, proximity to a major airport, and accepted young boarders. Our choice proved corrected . The 2nd time, we also got our 1st choice.

Whether one pays for ABC’s services or that of any nonprofit or not should not determine the level of service anyone receives. ABC employees are compensated and my family pours back into the organization through volunteering. No company or organization should get all the glory but not the accountability for lost educational opportunities when mismatches are made because referral requests are disregarded.

My anger or gratitude is not the point of my post. To answer your question, I am grateful for ABC and my family pours back into ABC regularly through volunteering. This should not suggest ABC should not be open to assessment on where improvements can be made, without defensiveness.

I offered observations from my family’s experience. If my post helps one family understand how it can better advocate for its student(s) when referral requests are rejected, then my post will not be in vain.

We have the same understanding that we can apply independently and I am prepared to do so, however, I believe this would not be necessary if ABC trusted families’ referral requests in the same way we are asked to trust the process. Trust works both ways! This doesn’t seem like an unreasonable expectation. I believe most placements work out. Sometimes they don’t and these incidents can likely be minimized if referral requests are given more consideration. Families and scholars research, interview, visit and make important observations about schools when making referral requests. They know when a fit/connection is made. These insights are too invaluable to disregard in the referral process. ABC families should be regarded as resources & partners in the referring process.

The first time we applied, we picked one school because it met our requirements for academics, size, location, proximity to a major airport & it accepted young boarders. Our 1st choice worked out and again the 2nd time. This says a lot!!!

I know/ do not feel I am owed anything. Whether one pays for services from ABC or any non profit should not determine the level of service one receives. ABC employees are compensated for the services they provide. Any company or organization can take the credit for the victories. A smart one will look critically at its mistakes and what it can do better. No company or group gets to take all the glory but not accountability. Accountability should be taken when student-school mismatches occur because the referring committee rejected referral preferences that later pan out when families apply independently. This avoidable reality can unfortunately undermine confidence in the referring process and those involved.

Hi my son just did the SSAT today in Boston. I guess it’s the first step. Any information would be appreciated.

@elijahsmom my daughter is part of the 2018 cohort. We started this time last year and we recently signed our contract so she is now officially an ABC scholar! What are you looking to find out?

My son will sit for the SSAT in Chicago on Sunday. I have a few general questions about ABC. We are interested in applying to local private day schools as well as pursuing the boarding option. Does ABC provide an opportunity for students to sit the ISEE exam or is this something we need to pursue on our own? With regard to the required summer workshops, we have a conflict with summer programming he has received and accepted scholarships for. These are great opportunities at Amherst University and John Hopkins CTY and I do not want him to miss out on these experiences. Is it possible to miss the summer workshops and still participate in the program?

Hello @elijahsmom, I have been watching these boards hoping to connect with other families going through the application process. We do not know any ABC families and were referred to ABC by another program. I just wanted to say Hello.

@elijahsmom and @1OboeMom , I have a son who is currently a sophmore and is an ABC scholar. He was in the cohort for the 2016/2017 year. I also have a son who is an applicant for this summer’s cohort. As far as missing the summer events, you’d have to check with the individual program director about whether that is okay. Most of the summer work from two summers ago was focused on SSAT prep. They might be willing to let it go to miss a day or two. Also, the dates that they listed aren’t written in stone. Two summers ago the dates changed significantly. I would suggest just waiting until you find out if your child was accepted in June and then letting the PD know of any conflicts.

As far taking the test for real, ABC will offer an official exam in the fall (either the SSAT or ISEE depending on your child’s need), however, you can register to take the tests at another time as well. You can also wait until you see the results of the ABC administration of the exam and determine at that time if you’ll need more tries.

@1OboeMom last year some places were offered both the SSAT and the ISEE to sit with ABC, but not in my daughter’s case. I signed her up independently anyway for an ISEE for right at the beginning of September — she sat the ISEE one weekend and the SSAT the very next weekend! It gave me peace of mind to have her do both but I’m not sure which one was submitted.

The summer workshop is where the kids work on their personal statements for their application, bear in mind things move pretty quickly once September comes so it’s important for them to attend. I would wait a few more weeks to see if your child is accepted then worry about it!

Thanks for your response. We should be notified by June 10th, fingers crossed.

guys, sorry to sound stupid, but was is this ABC? didn’t find any information in this thread to the website or how to find it :))

A Better Chance

@1OboeMom have you heard anything? I’m anxiously waiting.

They won’t announce early. The announcement date is the 15? Correct?

I believe it’s the 15th. I went through old posts and last year it appears applicants were informed by logging in to their portal. I checked and it still says under review.