A Harrowing Tale of Sexual Assault at Amherst College

Parents Forum
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<p>momofthree, I rarely disagree with you, either. But, I am saying that in the case of this crime, reporting has serious consequences for the ACCUSER. I see very little in the way of consequences for the accused, though, perhaps now that young women are learning not to be stigmatized by speaking out, this may finally change.</p>

<p>Don’t take my word for it. Look at the recent findings by the department of justice and you will find that they recently released new guidelines for how campuses should be dealing with sexual assault, sexual harrassment and rape cases which occur on their campus. The reason for this was because it is true this has not been being dealt with in an effective way for many, many years.</p>

<p>There is a reason I made my daughter live in single sex housing her freshman year. I see no benefit at all to young women in co ed housing. Particularly in year one.</p>

<p>I believe in innocent until proven guilty. But I also believe no victim should be put on trial for a crime committed against HER.</p>

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<p>Thank you poetgrl for #134. You said it better than I could. The statistics mini’s shared are shocking. Believable but shocking. This account is shocking and upsetting. But what’s bothering me most is the reaction I’m seeing here. I don’t disagree that there should be greater support for women reporting rape to the police directly. I don’t disagree that the school’s options might have been limited when this woman did report the rape. But, my goodness folks, as poetgrl points out, if your kid was mugged or carjacked or had his dorm burglarized, would you reasonably expect that the police, the school, or other parents would have an initial skeptical reaction?</p>

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<p>I, too, am not to fond of communal bathrooms and coed halls and think it’s totally appropriate to keep freshman in separate sex dorms. Seems like small changes that could potentially add up over time. I’m not sure how you get through a trial or even a disciplinary hearing without asking questions of the accused and the accuser. And sometimes in the case of date rape or absence of evidence of force because of a trip to the ER how administrators cut through all the back and forth to make an informed decision. But I suppose if you want something actionable to occur it is reasonable to expect that both statements will be scrutinized. But I can be alittle hard on “my sex” if they do nothing then run around wringing their hands, posting on blogs and talking about how no one helps them and we can champion the rights of women to press charges.</p>

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<p>At this point we can champion the rights of women to press charges. It is effective now. But, and I know you weren’t born in the last ten years, it wasn’t too long ago that what a woman was wearing on the night she was raped could be used against her in a court of law.</p>

<p>This has been a long journey, and the journey is not over. But, the truth is that the way girls have been treated on college campuses for rape reporting has been horrible. Not only by the administration, but by their fellow classmates. The instinct to blame the victim in this crime is long in dying out. It’s a good fight to fight, but ask yourself why, in the case of other crimes, nobody ever questions the motives of the reporter, while in teh case of rape, particularly aquaintance rape (it’s not called date rape anymore), they so frequently do.</p>

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<p>Momofthreeboys, have you been the victim of a violent crime? I was mugged when I was in my 20’s. Friends living in the same city during the same period of time had other experiences with violent crime. One was mugged and beaten to the point where her face was unrecognizable. Two were held up at gunpoint. One was raped. Each one of us did report the crime to the police. Only one of us was treated with suspicion and questioned about our own role in the crime. Any guesses who that was? Each one of us was affected tremendously by the crime and had a difficult time after it. Only one of us suffered for years afterward. Any guesses who that was?</p>

<p>What I would have liked to see in place here is a counselor trained in counseling rape victims and a program in place during freshman orientation to make it clear to students, male and female, that there is a safe place to go at any hour if one is assaulted in any way. I’d also like the program to restate ad nauseum that rape is not the fault of the victim no matter what and that the office is there to help. I’d like to see widespread training offered for students in running rape hotlines and peer counseling. And most of all I’d like to see support and validation for the very predictable reactions that rape victims suffer.</p>

<p>And for what it’s worth, I don’t view this student as running around wringing her hands and talking about how no one helps her. I view her as making real changes in the campus culture and in exposing a real problem that has been acknowledged and corroborated by many, many other women. I sincerely hope that the voices of support outweigh the voices of criticism and judgment.</p>

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<p>Actually this sounds horrible, but because women do have the “power” to use sex as a weapon just as some men can use physical strength as a weapon. This recently happened in our high school and my son was one of the young men questioned during the investigation. In retrospect it was a huge wake-up call for my son and his friends including the young man that was accused. The investigation took at least a month if not longer. The school was charged with handling the fallout (and you can guess how that was going). Fortunately, we had talked about these situations at dinner earlier last year and my son felt comfortable telling me about it and telling me that he had been pulled out of school to talk to the police. The journey is not over, but I do think the more women report and use the channels at their disposal instead of wringing their hands and feeling unempowered the better it will be. The ultimate result may not be what they “want” but it will hopefully be fair and just for everyone. Meanwhile we have to be willing to talk opening to young adults about their sexual behavior and how to keep themselves personally safe. We cannot be squeamish about this and assume they will figure it all out.</p>

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<p>“The colleges do NOT have to wait for a conviction to expel a student. Students get expelled all the time for behavior ‘not conducive to educational atmosphere’ of the institution.”</p>

<p>Mini my concern - this can turn into a witch hunt if the word of an accuser can get another student expelled and labeled as a rapist without due process leading to a conviction, especially in a case like this when the accuser comes forward 9 months after the alleged sexual assault and with only her word/memory as evidence. </p>

<p>Based on her “testimony” in this piece, this fellow has been labeled by many as a rapist. We don’t have his name, but that could still come out; someone certainly could put 2 and 2 together and put his name on a internet board and or Facebook. That would be a tragedy because we really don’t know what happened - as many have stated in this thread, he could be entirely innocent.</p>

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<p>Momof3boys said “And redpoint you think that a business has a right to fire someone or a college has a right to expel someone simply on the basis of one person’s accusation”</p>

<p>Since when did I say expel someone merely because he was accused???. But for public safety’s sake, expel them once they have been found guilty. Getting suspended for a summer term the perp wasn’t going to do anyway, as in the Indiana U case . . I again can’t fathom it. Why does the school want to keep the guy there?</p>

<p>It doesn’t seem like the schools care about the public safety of future victims when they keep the guys around.</p>

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<p>“Mini my concern - this can turn into a witch hunt if the word of an accuser can get another student expelled and labeled as a rapist without due process leading to a conviction, especially in a case like this when the accuser comes forward 9 months after the alleged sexual assault and with only her word/memory as evidence.”</p>

<p>If those dozens of raped women felt confident that coming forward at an early time would actually result in real consequences in the near-term (not like a court case that could take 18 months if it ever got there, or a plea bargain), maybe it wouldn’t take nine months. Having several dozen rapists (and more sexual assaulters) prowling a small college campus is hardly a way to make women feel safe in coming forward.</p>

<p>Look - these isn’t easy, and is going to require an entire culture change at places where the current one has been entrenched for a very long time. (BTW, my older one attended Smith, an all-women’s college. At her accepted student’s weekend, a prospective student was sexually harassed by a second-year student. That student was expelled within a month. Not for rape, not for violent sexual assault, not for sexual assault, but for sexual harassment at a public dance. Things can be done differently, if there is a will to do so.)</p>

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<p>No, I’m REALLY that amazingly frustrated that these crimes continue and that college women continue to be victimized. I’m also aware that because of feminists and brave women who went to the police and demanded respect women are treated very differently now than they were when <em>I</em> was in college, and the idea of victim’s advocates and rape specialists was only dawning. Are YOU that amazingly ignorant?</p>

<p>Mini, Williamstown may have only two officers trained in rape cases. If EVERY woman, or even HALF of the 44 women who you claim are raped at Williams every year WENT TO THE POLICE PROMPTLY they would train a heck of a lot more officers, pronto. Not only that, but they would not be able to sweep it under the rug, either in the prosecutor’s office or the college. </p>

<p>Things would change.</p>

<p>Poetgrl, I agree that reporting is good no matter when in is done. It is obviously BEST when done at a point where physical evidence still exists, but better late[r] than never.</p>

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<p>For the record…</p>

<p>Stranger rape is more common in single sex dorms than in co-ed dorms. At colleges which have co-ed by floor dorms, the ground floor and the top floor are usually all male for security reasons. Don’t be so naive that you think living in a single sex dorm protects your daughter; it doesn’t. In the rare instance in which rapes in progress are thwarted, it’s usually another male who thwarts them. In terms of the likelihood that someone will actually TRY to stop a rapist if the victim screams, yells out, whatever, from what I’ve read, the victim in a co-ed dorm is more likely to have someone–almost always a male–try to help. </p>

<p>I am absolutely appalled by the women who think that all the poor misguided young woman who is raped has to do is to call the cops and all will be well. Young women who are raped by strangers are much more likely to call the cops. This is in part because if the accusation doesn’t “stick” they don’t have to live with the accused. It’s also because a woman who accuses a stranger of raping her is much more likely to be believed. </p>

<p>Contrast this with the situation in which a young woman is raped by someone she knows. This is much more common…and much less likely to be reported. Girl meets boy. They have a few dates. On the third one, the guy decides they are having sex. That’s the unwritten code at some schools. Accept a third date and you’ve agreed to have sex. Unfortunately, the young woman didn’t get the memo.</p>

<p>They go out. They may drink. They go back to his or her room. They may kiss and fondle. She’s not worried. This has happened before. In the past, when she said no, he respected the no. Then at some point, she doesn’t want to go any further. He does…and he does.</p>

<p>If you think the police are going to do a darn thing about that scenario, then I’d like to sell you the Brooklyn Bridge. It’s a “he said” “she said” situation. If he uses a condom, there may not be any physical evidence. It would take an extraordinary chain of circumstances in that situation for him to be found guilty of rape beyond a reasonable doubt. </p>

<p>We’ve gotten into these arguments before. I had a vicious argument with another poster who said that if a woman accuses a male of rape he shouldn’t have to switch dorms because it’s just an accusation. I disagree. In New York State, if a woman alleges that a man has physically abused her, she can get an order of protection against him. She doesn’t have to prove that he’s actually abused her; the allegation is enough to get an order of protection. I think colleges should AT LEAST have something akin to this. Angie shouldn’t have to prove “beyond a reasonable doubt” that someone raped her to get switched into another dorm and have him told that if he goes near her he will be expelled.</p>

<p>Back about a decade ago, a survey of American male college students showed that about 35% of them said they would rape a woman if they could get away with it. We’ve created a situation in which they can. Why are we surprised when they do?</p>

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<p>Unfortunately, there are no single -sex housing options at Williams, nor even single-sex bathroom options for a large portion of campus. While it may not be an issue for most students, it could be a very difficult issue for a sexual assault survivor.</p>

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<p>Like an employee, if a student is “charged” with a crime…and prosecutor’s offices generally don’t take a year to make the determination… there is cause to put a student on leave. If the student is found guilty the leave can become an expulsion. If the student is found not guilty they can return if they wish. If a student is being charged with rape there is going to be too many legal appointments and too much hanging over that kid’s head to be fully engaged in academics.</p>

<p>Getting a PPD requires going to the police. However, I absolutely think that if a student requests a dorm or housing change BECAUSE they have rape charge pending criminally or with the college the college should comply no questions asked.</p>

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<p>“Mini, Williamstown may have only two officers trained in rape cases. If EVERY woman, or even HALF of the 44 women who you claim are raped at Williams every year WENT TO THE POLICE PROMPTLY they would train a heck of a lot more officers, pronto. Not only that, but they would not be able to sweep it under the rug, either in the prosecutor’s office or the college.”</p>

<p>First of all, I am insulted - seriously insulted - by the very suggestion that “I would claim” that 44 women were raped. I claim NOTHING - the women themselves said they were raped. And hundreds of others said they had been sexually assaulted. I do not believe the women at my alma mater are serious liars. I do not believe the President of my alma mater would make such a big deal of it - including announcing the numbers publicly - if he thought they were liars. I claim NOTHIING - and if you think those hundreds of women are lying, I ask you to prove it. (Amherst, by the way, has not released the results of their survey.)</p>

<p>Secondly, it would seem that 1) you don’t live and haven’t lived in a small town, and 2) you haven’t dealt with municipal budgets. I’ve done both. Just to give you a quick example of what might happen in the first: if a rape examination had to be performed at a hospital, the nearest hospital is six miles away, on a road virtually buried in snow much of the year. Several years ago, the college’s own health service had to close (permanently) at night because they couldn’t find ANY physicians willing to handle the load of alcohol poisoned students. And who pays for the rape examinations? The police, of course. Remember it was 44 women raped, not 44 rapes. (I think it more likely that it is an under-report, that more women were not willing, even on a survey, to say they were raped - and even more men.) Then add in the police costs for all sexual assaults. It’s not even within the realm of possibility (on this planet).</p>

<p>Meanwhile, even assuming (which I most emphatically do not) that a municipality would eventually respond to a college rape epidemic with the seriousness it deserves, in the meantime, women are condemned to reporting to a system which we can all agree is not set up to deal in any serious way with the degree of need.</p>

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<p>Way to grossly over-simplify and distort. No one has said it would be easy.</p>

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<p>I am not so simpleminded as to think that every guy, or even most guys, in that situation would be found guilty of rape in a trial. (This begs the question of why–in YOUR scenario-- she does not just get the hell up and LEAVE when he pauses to put on a condom! But of course, the reality is probably that she is blotto, incapacitated, drunk on her ass. The classic drunken hookup.)</p>

<p>I do believe, though, that after case after case like this was presented and investigated, THINGS WOULD CHANGE. Guys who think that it is cute to “persist” when she says no would not find being the object of a police investigation an attractive proposition.</p>

<p>I’ve gotten to the point where I think that what is needed is something akin to a civil rights movement. FORCE the legal system and the colleges to address case after case after case. Girls are in the majority at most of the schools we are talking about. TAKE THE POWER. </p>

<p>Savannah Dietrich is my hero. She refused to be shamed and silenced. Was it easy for her? No. Will she probably have to deal with trauma from this? Yes. Will it be better because she took the power into her own hands? I believe so. I hope so.</p>

<p>Mini, your figure of 44 assumes that there is no sampling bias: only 890 or so students at Williams responded to the survey. It is not unreasonable to wonder whether those who had been the victims of assault disproportionately chose to answer the survey. Be that as it may, I fully agree that FAR TOO MANY women at Williams hve been raped.</p>

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<p>Wrong on both counts. In fact, I live in a town of 7,500, and I am fairly familiar with municipal budget issues.</p>

<p>Williams is a cash cow for Williamstown. If women took the power into their own hands, SOMEONE would have to cough up the cash: the college or the town. I actually believe that Williams as an institution aspires to ideals that would make rape and sexual assault unthinkable. But the community has to do something to make that a reality.</p>

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<p>Thanks, Jonri - parts of this thread are enough to make one think s/he’s among the “legitimate rape” and “some girls rape easy” crowd.</p>

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<p>“The classic drunken hookup.” Bad potential outcome for both males and females. And it’s been going on forever on most college campuses.Hopefully, campuses can do a better job with education all the way around.</p>

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<p>Oh, ********.</p>

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<p>Consolation I am so “with you” on this.</p>

<p>Jonri, I’ll ask this question. Given the scenario you presented what does the woman “want”? If it’s forcible why would she NOT go to ER and possibly get bruises documented etc. etc. What does she want to have happen? In the absence of action on the part of the victim and/or any witnesses or people in the vicinity that might of heard her struggle it IS he said, she said and absolutely could be perceived as retribution rather than prosecution if she does nothing. </p>

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<p>How have we created this situation? Through the common use of contraceptives? Through empowering women to feel comfortable about their sexuality and to be open and casual about sex? Through allowing hook-up and sex with benefits to permeate our media? I’m some what troubled by the fact that in spite of decades of female empowerment we still want to view women as weaklings and men as aggressors. Yeah, I agree she didn’t get the memo.</p>

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<p>“Mini, your figure of 44 assumes that there is no sampling bias: only 890 or so students at Williams responded to the survey. It is not unreasonable to wonder whether those who had been the victims of assault disproportionately chose to answer the survey. Be that as it may, I fully agree that FAR TOO MANY women at Williams hve been raped.”</p>

<p>The same survey was given to students at several dozen campuses. Maybe you also think that Williams women who answer surveys are simply more likely to lie than those on other campuses? (and lie in one direction?) </p>

<p>Williams College (like Amherst, like Wesleyan, etc.) has plenty of money, and lots of really smart people to deal with the rape epidemic if they choose to. They similarly have the resources to deal with their alcoholic environments. When they don’t, it is because they choose not to. One dean at Williams (sorry for picking on them - as my alma mater, it is a school I follow, and I don’t think it is that much different than many others) said publicly, in print, that the college wasn’t really going to deal with its alcohol epidemic until a student died. I had communications with the previous President and essentially got the same impression. (I think the new one really means business, but we’ll see.)</p>

<p>Maybe if they used the binge drinking/rape survey reporting statistics in USNWR rankings it might get someone’s attention.</p>

<p>“If it’s forcible why would she NOT go to ER and possibly get bruises documented etc. etc.”</p>

<p>Try doing that in Williamstown in February. An ER? What ER? Or maybe get it documented at night at the college health services? What health services? Or maybe the local rape crisis center. What local rape crisis center?</p>

<p>(Of course, maybe it’s just an epidemic of women lying about rape on a survey.)</p>