<p>My parents have recently starting bringing some of my childhood things that I left at their house each time they come to visit us. We usually have a good time reminiscing/laughing at some of the stuff. But I find it sad, too, that my mom is feeling a need to clear out their house.</p>
<p>A couple of years ago sister put all her things in storage while she was on an extended trip overseas. The storage facility went bankrupt, she didn’t receive the letter they sent her, and lost everything she had stored. If the letter had gone to our parents, someone could have rescued her things.</p>
<p>It’s not that I like to feel needed; I never said that. I don’t, and I hope they won’t need me, although I think they will. It’s just that, for me, it is a given that my home is their home until I die, or I am homeless. My parents did it for me, therefore I owe it to my children. That’s how I repay my debt to my parents: by giving my children the same or better, if I can. Hopefully better.</p>
<p>Re post #22 – I thought you said you moved around a lot? Do you shlep all your kids’ roomfuls of accumulated stuff (books, clothing, childhood artefacts) with you every time you move?</p>
<p>Military brat here. We moved every 3 years and mom didn’t keep a thing when we moved besides furniture and clothes. They moved again the summer between my HS graduation and starting college and informed me that if I didn’t take it to college with me, it wouldn’t be there when I returned “home” (it wasn’t really my home since I never lived there). But never fear, my folks retired and now live 30 minutes from us and we have a great relationship. The only thing I regret selling in one of our epic garage sales was my Beatles lp collection (I thought albums were dead!)</p>
<p>calmom:
My son went to Williams last year, and he was the first to go to college. My daughters are still young, 14 and 11. My son’s room is still the way he left it (well, I cleaned it up a little.) When I move, I will of course take all his stuff with me. Once you hire movers for a houseful of furniture, one more room doesn’t really make that much of a difference. My house is for sale now, so hopefully it will be soon, but who knows? My wife hates Chicago weather, and she wants to move back to Mexico, even if it’s almost a war zone right now, and the kidnappings haven’t abated either. I think that’s unbelievably stupid and irresponsible (we have two daughters that would be coming with us,) and I’m trying to convince her that we should try California, where I just obtained a license to pratice.</p>
<p>So true. I admit my son (senior in college) has a right to think we are still home, but do I really need the weekly report of his summer income (which was direct deposited in his account) or his cable and internet bills. Not to mention all the invitations to try cigarettes. (Where did that come from?This kid has never touched a cigarette, unlike his parents…)</p>
<p>My parents solved the problem by moving around even more than I did. (Foreign service not military.) I actually got to turn the tables when somehow I ended up with stuff from storage which included my mother’s old life drawings and programs from plays I’d never been to. I tossed it. :)</p>
<p>I had a friend who went away to college and when she returned at break found another family living in “her house”. Her parents had sold the house and moved and “forgot” to tell her. Her stuff did get moved however.</p>
<p>My post isn’t about mail so much but more about “stuff.” Someone on this thread mentioned telling their kids they could have just TWO BOXES of stuff saved. Oy vey. I can’t imagine it! </p>
<p>In our case…both kids have not lived at home ever (not even a summer) since starting college and are now out of college. First, their bedrooms are exactly as they left them after high school (as if they still lived in them). Next, our basement was already full of all their clothes, toys, books, other stuff from growing up, and numerous boxes of schoolwork by year (including college years), etc. Currently, D1 is overseas for a year and we have all the stuff she normally has with her where she lives, plus we now are also storing in the basement (once we make room for it) an entire apartment’s worth of her furniture. This is in addition to some furniture I saved for the kids in the basement from my parents who have now passed away. </p>
<p>While my kids live away from home, I would not call wherever they live “permanent” at this time (especially D1), and also one lives in an apartment in NYC and only has so much room anyway, and so they do have all their “old” stuff from prior to college still at our house (except D1 for this year only also has all her current belongings here for just the year). I truly don’t mind and do have the room. </p>
<p>I can’t imagine how I could EVER relegate what I have of theirs to TWO BOXES! And I shudder to think of what it would ever be like if we moved.</p>
<p>interesting topic- i never thought to formulate my thoughts about it- well my parents kept toooo much and every time i visited they refused to throw away/give away my stuff- i’m talking prom dresses from 1970’s and they are musty smelling. at times when i can i take a load in the car and throw away or donate things on the way out of town to the airport. my husbands parents i think have less of his stuff but they moved to another home so that helped. i have D2 to launch this week, the last one and i expect her bedroom to be neat when she leaves like D1 -so i can use the bedrooms if we have visitors or they bring friends back on break. paperwork has been important for D1 who is in grad school and abroad for a year- like jury summons, health insurance card, etc. anything that looks important i email her and ask what to do with it- she says to open it and at times i have scanned the letter for her. the paperwork for her has been really minimal. so basically they can store their stuff as long as the bedroom is neat and usable for guests. so far that the plan.</p>
<p>Count me in the group of parents irritated by receivng the kid’s official mail from the college while the kid is AT college. My S went to Dartmouth, so I thought the practice of sending the mail to the permanent address was tied in with the D-plan and the fact the students are on and off campus at different times. But now D is at a school where we actually had to pay for her campus PO Box, but the school sends me her mail here. Today I just received the ticket she bought for an event on campus. Now does this make any sense at all???</p>
<p>When asking a college official about freshmen mid-quarter grades, she winked at me and said, “Look for them in the mail. We mail them to the parents’ address.” Now that I like ;)</p>