If I have learned anything about life it is, that things don’t always go the way you plan. Hardships and unfortunate circumstances will always obstruct your path to success, but it is important to think positive and continue to move forward. When I was admitted into Seton Hall University I was ecstatic. I considered the feat my most memorable achievement to date. Needless to say, I became downtrodden when I received the news that because of my poor academic standing; I was being placed on academic suspension for failing to make satisfactory progress in the Fall 2015/Spring 2016 academic year. I am aware of the circumstances that led to this decision. However I would like to be reinstated for the Fall 2016 semester to prove to the university, namely the College of Arts and Sciences, that I can achieve my academic goals.
I came into Seton Hall as a pre-science major for Athletic Training, but soon realized that path was not for me. Looking back on my freshman year I felt like I rushed into college not understanding the full extent of the responsibilities I had acquired. I had a decent first semester, and felt that I could do well going forward. The summer leading into my sophomore year I began to take on series of mental and financial burdens and placed unnecessary stress on myself. My parents have always had their differences, both directly and indirectly dragging me into their turmoil. I felt as if I had become a financial burden to them, and worried about how they would meet my educational needs financially. I wasn't right mentally to return after having such a bad previous semester and ongoing family issues. Instead of seeking help I allowed my pride to get in the way and rushed back into school without improving my mental situation. I began to carelessly skip class, spent most of my days in the gym, and partied too much. My cumulative GPA following my second year clearly shows my effort to relieve myself from academic probation, thus leading to the decision of temporary suspension effective the Fall 2016 semester. I understand that my track record does not translate that I do want to pursue a higher education. I am confident that given the second chance I will prove that I do have the potential to be a Dean’s list caliber student, and that I do have strong resolve to pursue my career path.
“A real decision is measured by the fact that you’ve taken a new action. If there’s no action, you haven’t truly decided-Tony Robbins.” At the end of the fall semester last year, I finally realized that I wanted to become a Psychotherapist to help people better understand their mental issues and aid them down the path to recovery. My cumulative GPA currently is a 1.384 and I am aware that I would have to retake courses that I have received a failing grade in order to improve my GPA. Taking five courses, I would have to achieve an A or higher in one course and Bs in the other four in order to improve my GPA . I have the utmost confidence that I can achieve that. I have already comprised a list of classes that I could take this semester to reach that goal and have verified their availability. I have been in contact with the housing department and inquired about room availability on a weekly basis and so far there have still been rooms open. My family and I sat down and we went over our financial options, and the one thing they explicitly expressed to me was that if I do my part and focus on my education, getting good grades, that they would concern themselves with how to meet my financial needs. They have taken the necessary steps and have met my financial need for the academic year. I would like to repay them first by properly taking advantage of the opportunities they have given me so that I can become successful and eventually not only pay them back, but everyone who has supported my education financially including the Department of Education. I can say with the utmost confidence that I am ready to focus wholly on my studies, get my academic life back on track god willing this semester. I appreciate your taking the time to allow me to appeal this academic suspension decision.
Much much much too long.
Paragraph1- My name is _ and I am writing to appeal my suspension. Write 2 or 3 more sentences stating that you know you messed up and that you plan on making changes. This should be a short paragraph.
Paragraph 2-What happened? Again you don’t need so much detail. You had mental health issues. You had family issues. You worried about money. You partied too much. This paragraph can be 7 or 8 sentences but it should not have so much detail about your parents issues and financial issues.
Paragraph 3-What do you plan to do differently if they lift the suspension.Scrap the entire paragraph. Say what you want to do differently than you did last year. How do you intend to get good grades? It is ok to mention that your family has agreed to help you financially but that only takes ONE SHORT sentence. How do you intend to focus on your studies. How are you going to get your mental health issues resolved?
The bottom line is that you need to tell them what you are going to do differently and you need to be much more succinct about it.
This is very verbose.
I don’t understand if you thought you were being an financial burden, why wouldn’t you try to do your best so your parent’s get their money’s worth?
So specifically, what were the problems?
What was your GPA first semester? What did you get each of the other semesters? What year are you in?
What mental burden did you have?
What financial burden?
If you have a cumulative GPA of 1.3…would taking a full load and expecting to get A’s and B’s be realistic?
What specific steps will you take to do this? E.g.,
Things such as:
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GO TO CLASS, BUY THE BOOK, READ THE CHAPTERS, AND DO THE HOMEWORK!
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Go to Professor’s office hours and Ask this question: “I know this is a really difficult class-- what are some of the common mistakes students make and how can I avoid them?”
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If you have problems with the homework, go to Prof’s office hours. If they have any “help sessions” or “study sessions” or “recitations” or any thing extra, go to them.
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Form a study group with other kids in your dorm/class.
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Don’t do the minimum…for STEM classes do extra problems. You can buy books that just have problems for calculus or physics or whatever. Watch videos on line about the topic you are studying.
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Go to the writing center if you need help with papers/math center for math problems (if they have them)
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If things still are not going well, get a tutor.
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Read this book: How to Become a Straight-A Student: The Unconventional Strategies Real College Students Use to Score High While Studying Less by Cal Newport. It helps you with things like time management and how to figure out what to write about for a paper, etc.
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If you feel you need to withdraw from a class, talk to your advisor as to which one might be the best …you may do better when you have less classes to focus on. But some classes may be pre-reqs and will mess your sequence of classes up.
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For your tests, can you evaluate what went wrong? Did you never read that topic? Did you not do the homework for it? Do you kind of remember it but forgot what to do? Then next time change the way you study…there may be a study skill center at your college.
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How much time outside of class do you spend studying/doing homework? It is generally expected that for each hour in class, you spend 2-3 outside doing homework. Treat this like a full time job.
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At first, don’t spend too much time other things rather than school work. (sports, partying, rushing fraternities/sororities, video gaming etc etc)
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If you run into any social/health/family troubles (you are sick, your parents are sick, someone died, broke up with boy/girlfriend, suddenly depressed/anxiety etcetc) then immediately go to the counseling center and talk to them. Talk to the dean of students about coordinating your classes…e.g. sometimes you can take a medical withdrawal. Or you could withdraw from a particular class to free up tim for the others.Sometimes you can take an incomplete if you are doing well and mostly finished the semester and suddenly get pneumonia/in a car accident (happened to me)…you can heal and take the final first thing the next semester. But talk to your adviser about that too.
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At the beginning of the semester, read the syllabus for each class. It tells you what you will be doing and when tests/HW/papers are due. Put all of that in your calendar. The professor may remind you of things, but it is all there for you to see so take initiative and look at it.
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Make sure you understand how to use your online class system…Login to it, read what there is for your classes, know how to upload assignments (if that is what the prof wants).
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If you get an assignment…make sure to read the instructions and do all the tasks on the assignment. Look at the rubric and make sure you have covered everything.
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If you are not sure what to do, go EARLY to the professors office hours…not the day before the assignment is due.
Thank you for your input, I will definitely consider all of the points you made in my revision. However, I do have one more question. Was it unnecessary to add that quote?
ALso, look at this example. See all the details on the plan to change?
http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-admissions/1912350-appeal-letter-for-readmission-after-dismissal.html#latest
The quote is not needed. Tell them how you are going to change. Give specifics and leave out all the other stuff.
Things to cut:
- Everything before "When I was admitted..."
- "My parents...financially."
- "'A real decision...improve my GPA."
- "My family and I...department of Education."
And that doesn’t even scratch the surface. Those are just several major chunks that could be removed completely; the rest of the stuff, which still has necessary information, is still too wordy.
I suggest you consider a different style of writing. The draft above reads like an essay for a class. Instead, your task here is to write a professional letter. The person reading this is not a professor who wants you to meet the minimum word requirement.
The first paragraph can be condensed into one or two sentences at most.
Dear XXX committee,
I am writing to appeal my academic suspension resulting from my failure to make academic progress during the 2015-2016 school year. I am asking to be re-admitted for Fall 2016.
That could replace your entire first paragraph.