<p>mark19,</p>
<p>Something tells me that you're reading a bit too deeply into things. You sound like a buddy of mine from undergrad who thought that everyone was constantly judging him. </p>
<p>Most of us really don't have the time or inclination to do so. Maybe they just didn't catch the word, or it caught their ear and they were thinking about it in a different context. Your whole "freak show" notion is pretty out there and hard to prove, to be honest.</p>
<p>Mark: I agree with UCLAri; you're being too self-conscious. Maybe I'm reading too deeply into things, but I notice that many of your posts are edited. Why? because you made small grammatical mistakes? That's ok! This is just a message board, not a term paper. If that's an indication of how you try to be too perfect in real life, then by all means loosen up! You sound like an awfully intelligent and analytical guy, and it'd be a shame if an accent prevents you from showing what you have to offer.</p>
<p>^ thank you for the support. Yeah,I am highly introspective of other's perception of me and of how I present myself. Very impressive of you to correlate that to the number of times I edit my posts, which I do quite often indeed, but mostly to clarify what I want to express rather than fix grammatical mistakes, like you assumed. </p>
<p>I used the term freak show to describe a natural reaction of people to be judgmental and apprehensive when seeing something bizarre without any "warning." I have noticed that everytime an international student with a thick or notable accent speaks in class(including myself), everyone turns their heads and keeps starring as if the person was a weirdo. I know, the other student's intention is not to disprove or intimidate the individual, but that is what it seems like from the subject's stand point. </p>
<p>I guess this "sense of amused-horror"(lynxie) from the audience elicits further anxiety on me to the already present fear of public speaking, like heepmesane mentioned.</p>
<p>Alwaysfaithful, I imagine you have experience this before with the issue you have.</p>
<p>Also, beanie, I empathize with what your father went through a lot--let’s just say that I do not order smoothies as much as I would want :-D.</p>
<p>Do try an find a Toastmaster group as was suggested earlier. This is an international group of people who all have trouble with public speaking and want to improve.You start off with small relplies and work your way up to bigger and more complex speeches at your own rate and comfot level. Very supportive group with chapters in many cities and campuses.</p>
<p>I was very self conscious when I was younger. I finally got over it by realizing that most people are thinking about themselves or their responses or what they are going to eat for dinner instead of hanging on my every word during a talk or discussion. Unless you are a dynamic public speaker with an awesome topic most people are waiting for you to finish and are not even listening (especially in a college class). College students in class for the most part are very self absorbed.</p>
<p>mark19, when i studied abroad in spain i had a similar issue. (the reverse issue, i guess!)</p>
<p>as i'm sure you know, listening to someone speak spanish with an american accent is pretty terrible, and there were plenty of native students who let me know how they felt, by staring at me and then shaking their heads when it took me a while to get out a word, conjugate a strange verb, or read a complicated sentence. even out of the class, when i was talking to my spanish friends at night in the street, i was very self-conscious until finally they told me to stop thinking so much and just be myself.</p>
<p>if you have to give a speech, try practicing in front of a friend who you know will be supportive-- your roommate, maybe, or whoever. this way you'll know where you might run into problems and can be ready to calm down and refocus yourself while you're presenting in class. staying as calm as possible is a big thing.... even when you're speaking to your best friend in your native language, you sometimes mess up words or stutter, right? but it's so much easier to fix when you're relaxed-- you just start the word again and move on. try to put yourself in this mentality in class.
it's hard, but i think that the more you do it, the easier it becomes. :)</p>
<p>ok here's a tip I use, I used to be kinda shy, but after a while I got over the fear of public speaking. how?</p>
<p>I had one thought in my mind. "I am better than all these suckers here."</p>
<p>Now I am not the arrogant jerk that the statement makes me seem like. But if u go in with that attitude, it does a few things:</p>
<p>1) u realize u know what u are doing
2) u start to believe u are actually better than everyone there
3) u realize that u dont need the audience's applause, rather they need ur speech
4) u gain confidence</p>
<p>Also, add a bit of humor if u mess up.</p>
<p>lets say u stutter non-stop, after a while just say right after stuttering "I hope you guys dont mind that I sound like a jackhammer" or "please excuse my stuttering, it is simply a reflection of the awe and honor it is to be able to speak in front of a fine group such as yourselves."</p>
<p>okay that last one requires a little charm and charisma to pull off, but remember ur better than everyone there, so it doesnt matter ;)</p>
<p>ns347,</p>
<p>One of my classmates was giving a presentation the other day in my accounting class, and being from Malaysia, has an accent and was noticeably nervous.</p>
<p>However, he threw in some jokes and at one point said, "In case nobody noticed, I'm nervous. Oh, and I'm not a native speaker. Shocking, isn't it?"</p>
<p>Everyone laughed, and the remainder of his portion went much more smoothly. I'm not saying that one should be laissez-faire about their approach to public speaking, but the "demonair" thing does endear a lot of people to him.</p>
<p>You mean Debonair?</p>
<p>I can empathize with a fear of public speaking. Fear of public speaking is natural; everyone gets at least a little nervous when having to talk in front of others. </p>
<p>I find it a little hard to believe that you are the only one in your class with an accent. Even people who come from different regions of the same country have trouble understanding each other sometimes. I'm from Texas, and when I have traveled to other places, people expect me to have an exaggerately thick accent - I don't, because of the region I'm from - but some of our inflections get mixed up in translation still. </p>
<p>Nobody's going to laugh at you or the way you speak. Most people should have matured by the time they get to college; they may be too focused/scared of their own speeches. The worst that could happen is that someone may ask you to repeat a statement or slow down (when you talk too fast, it comes out garbled) a bit. And if they say that, it's a good thing! It means they're actually listening. </p>
<p>Another thing: consider talking to a speech/language counselor, if they are available at your school. Also, even if not for this particular class, take a public speaking course (it's required where I go, and we're all better speakers for it), because you WILL be talking a lot in college. There's speeches, presentations, debates, introductions, etc., to give! Good luck.</p>
<p>
[quote]
You mean Debonair?
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Typo? What typo? ;)</p>
<p>Thanks for the advice everyone. I guess I should stop being self concious and pretend that the other people in the class are worthless morons. : ).</p>
<p>Oh boy do I know how you feel. I don't have an accent, but I am absolutely terrified of publc speaking. I have this feeling that everyone is constantly judging me. I know it's not true, but I still can't help but feel it. When I have to give a presentation or speech I shake SO hard that's it's completely noticeable. I get most self conscious about the fact that my voice shakes. I sound like I'm about to start crying and I get extremely self conscious. </p>
<p>I actually have been diagnosed with anxiety and take prozac (it runs in the family as well), but I only resorted to medication after couseling, relaxation techniques, etc failed. It doesn't eliminate the fear, but it takes the edge off of it. My anxiety was getting in the way of more than just presentations, however, so I would recommend trying other techniques first if this is the only situation that makes you anxious. </p>
<p>I actually love accents. I think they're really cool ha ha! Just know that you are not alone, a lot of us have been there. I've cut class to avoid reading out loud or said I have no opinion in debates to avoid talking, but this just further engraves the fear into your mind. Just get yourself through it and it will be that much easier ext time. I really hope everything works out for you. Best of luck!</p>
<p>Yeah, I guess you know how i feel. I was thinking about taking some medication like xanax as well to see if it allays the anxiety during these times, but i don't think I wold get my doctor to prescribe it very easily, so I never followed through. Thank you.</p>
<p>I think medication might be going overboard! I think it helps to know that the other students in your class will just be as nervous if not more nervous than you are. I used to get very nervous during presentations also (and I still do but it's much more controllable now). What helps me is practicing my presentation as much as I can beforehand. Also, I think public speech becomes much easier the more you have to do it. Basically, it's like confronting a fear rather than running away from it. Talk in very small groups and work your way into larger audiences. This has helped me a lot!</p>
<p>Peaceout, what effect does the medication has on your body? Does it lower your pulse and the "butterflies in the stomach" feeling?</p>