ADHD kids-How did they do their first semester/first year?

<p>Well, i did not fail per say, i just got decent grades (Bs and Cs). In highschool i normally got As :/</p>

<p>Timed tests do not like me in the slightest even with additional help.</p>

<p>My daughter did the LEAP program at Penn State U Park. I was very worried about sending her to such a huge place. There are 4000 freshmen, and a total of more than 45,000 students total. She was rejected at most of the LAC that she applied to. She is disorganized and was still missing assignments as a senior in her AP classes. She was an underperformer in HS with very high ACT scores. </p>

<p>This program is excellent. She earned 6 credits and learned how to “do college”. She had a buffer of credits and it allowed her to drop an unwanted class first semester and take a lighter load. She is now taking 18 credits and is doing well. She learned how to balance her time and choose class times. She got advice from upperclassmen. She learned the ropes and made lifelong friends. She learned where stuff was. She had support of their excellent student services center, and was assigned a counselor for 4 years. I cannot say enough about how wonderful this huge place has been. I know that there is a mentality that small LAC’s are best for these kids, but big schools like this have lots of resources. Penn State is an extremely well-oiled machine. Every step of the way was smoothly run from getting ID, opening bank accts, getting into the dorm, registering for classes, getting books. </p>

<p>My daughter got a job in State College over the summer. It helped her tremendously because she was forced to organize her time. My friends who have kids with ADHD have all agreed that their kids do better when they have chunks of activities, and worse when there’s a lot of idle time. You have to assume that with that many students, there has to be more than just a couple of kids with various learning issues. What it tells your kids to be in a big place like this is that there are a wide range of people in the world who all function differently. There’s an atmosphere of acceptance. My daughter was able to join a sorority. She’s going to live off campus next year and managed to scramble for an apartment when shut out of the housing lottery. All this from a daughter who had trouble getting work done and couldn’t remember to take her medicine. Her room at college is a disaster, but her roommate, not with ADHD, doesn’t care.</p>

<p>If I had it to do over again, I would send her to Penn State in a rocket!</p>

<p>NancyE -that is a great story! I have a dear friend who has a daughter with many of the same issues outlined by posters above - I’ve heard them all and watched my friend worry for years - her daughter also struggled freshman year but things eventually picked up and she graduated and is employed - doing very well. One recommendation I’ve heard my friend tell others is don’t send the child too far from home. As much as everyone likes to find that ‘perfect fit’ college which sometimes is a plane ride away her advice has been, if possible, to send them somewhere close enough where you can get in the car and be there in 2 hours or so. Goodluck to all.</p>

<p>Nancy ~ Congrats to your daughter and you. My son would be a PSU senior now, but withdrew and has been dx with ADHD inattentive. He also attended LEAP as a freshman, but things just got worse and worse. His advisor didn’t know him from Adam, now his ODS paperwork has been rejected again and again. (They don’t like the psychologist’s tests. They don’t like the form. They don’t like his meds. They want non-anecdotal evidence of ADHD prior to age 7. They don’t like that there were staples – not kidding — on the paperwork. ) We’ve been at this for 4 months now with no end in sight. ODS told us all they could do if they DID accept his paperwork was let him have longer for tests, which requires a 5-6step process for each test. I had hoped for more support for him. We are ready to give up. </p>

<p>Anyway, just to say that wow, that’s not been our experience but I’m glad to know it went well for someone else :slight_smile: He SO desperately wants to finish his degree, but I feel more and more like I’m never gonna be able to bail this leaky boat fast enough.</p>

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<p>I live in Texas and we thought that the small LAC route would work well. Terrible decision. First, an LAC wants students to be well rounded…meaning, lots of core requirements in areas that don’t interest the student. Second, no formal tuturing center or other programs or assistance for at risk students.</p>

<p>Greenbutton - hugs. I can so relate.</p>

<p>Am I the only ADHD student who applied to elite universities?..</p>

<p>My son is a freshman with ADHD at a top LAC. He has done very well considering (A, A-, A-, B-) first semester but has felt very overwhelmed with work and had difficulty regulating eating/sleep etc - he lost some weight, and he has missed some classes because he didn’t wake up despite a sonic boom alarm. </p>

<p>I would say the thing that has helped him the most is taking classes that he is very interested in. The classes that are distribution requirements are painfully hard for him to get motivated about. If he could do it again, he might have opted for a school without distribution requirements. It also helps that he is at a LAC with small classes and very accessible professors.</p>

<p>Just found this thread - thanks to all posters. It’s all very familiar - missing homework, missing school, not taking meds, while high IQ carries one through challenging classes with Bs. Anyone else watching their kid quit activities because everything is too boring…hoping that he/she will PLEASE find their (legal) passion and follow through…?</p>

<p>Milkweed, your point about distribution requirements & motivation is interesting. We thought that the block program - focusing on one class at a time - would be excellent, but colleges structured this way are few and far between (and in our case, far away)! Maybe something for others to consider.</p>

<p>We are awaiting notification from several schools. We tried to find colleges with strong advisory and support in study skills, organization, etc. which tend to be small schools with small classes. Of course, some of S’s preferences aren’t in sync - he added to the list a few diverse, busy places, “elite” as per Telandis above, that might prove too competitive, distracting or “sink-or-swim.” Sorting out the options isn’t easy.</p>

<p>Also looking at a non-academic gap year. Maybe 2 years would be better, from the sound of other posts.</p>

<p>Glad to know im not the only with the issues the above poster mentioned.</p>

<p>Just to show the other side, our DD struggled with ADHD her whole life. We had an IEP for her in fifth grade, had her “coached” every week as part of an IEP, and hired a “coach” when it became clear that the school RSP was not the best fit. As an educator, I bombarded her with 80 million suggestions for 10 years, monitored her meds, etc. She’s a great kid, and gradually improved but it was pretty nervewracking when she chose a large school on the opposite coast. </p>

<p>Fast forward. The first semester, she received the highest GPA of her entire life (3.7) is making excellent choices in friends, time management, and food/fitness/sleep, is attending office hours and requesting papers be reviewed by her profs during office hours, etc. I am incredibly impressed with her capabilities and her decision to take responsibility. i have always said that she took everyone’s suggestions, and put them in the freezer for when she wanted them. It appears that she has made the decision to simply defrost the entire kit and kaboodle. So take heart - some kids rise to the challenge and do really really well.</p>

<p>Wow! Shoot4Moon, So nice to see your story! My son has pretty much been a solid B student with all honors/AP course work until his senior year this year. One A-, 2 A+'s and the rest A’s with 3 AP and 3 honor courses. He seems to have really gotten it, but it is nerve racking wondering if he’ll be able to maintain things in college next year. You give me great hope! Best wishes to you and your D!</p>

<p>ShawD is ADHD. She has a relatively high IQ but is much more concrete than theoretical in her thinking. She attended a pretty competitive Boston area prep school and did pretty well after ADHD was diagnosed and she started getting extra time and taking Ritalin (the latter seemed to have a greater impact on performance than the former, but both helped). She was completely frightened watching the tension and depression that she saw among seniors applying to college and decided to go to college in Canada – she is a dual US/Canadian citizen and they tell you whether you are going to be admitted. We found a school that I thought was perfect for her in Canada. Relatively small, nurturing, and she would have been a strong student there. She attended a summer science program there and met several professors and then, because of one of my contacts, the President invited her to his house. But, it is pretty rural and there are not many Jews, so she decided to attend one of Canada’s stronger universities, which was much larger and had a broad range but would typically get many of the strong students from Ontario’s private schools and probably public high schools as well. She was studying biology – in Canada you pretty much choose early, which she liked, because she hates fuzzy stuff like history or literature. </p>

<p>Well, it was pretty competitive. I tried to get her to find tutors at the beginning of the semester but she didn’t, although she did go to the disabilities office to get extra time and later to get a peer mentor (who was very helpful). She made great friends and did reasonably well in all courses but chemistry, where she was not doing that well (probably a C- but we can’t know because it was a full year course and they don’t issue a grade until the end of the whole year – Canadian grading is significantly harder than in the US). Although she had made nice friends and, from the looks of Facebook, partying on a few weekends, but not too heavily, the academics really made her tense.</p>

<p>In orientation week, she’d met a girl who was studying nursing and ShawD actually tried to switch from biology to nursing before drop/add period even began, but they told her she’d have to reapply as a freshman because it was a separate faculty with separate admissions criteria. She decided she wanted to transfer to nursing. She was only going to apply in Canada but a nurse who is on CC took ShawD to her hospital to shadow a nurse and then suggested that ShawD also apply locally. She did and was admitted at one of the schools on nyc’s list for the winter semester. So, she transferred after one semester.</p>

<p>In her midterm reports, she appears to be doing very well so far from a grade standpoint. She’s at the top of several of her classes. She’s thrilled to be studying nursing. She has little patience for the Gen Ed classes, but she appears to be doing well in those as well. We’ll see if she can keep her grade up in the freshman writing course as she is not enjoying it that much. But, she takes Ritalin each day and can generally focus. Without it, she is all over the map. The school has been supportive of her request for extra time and is providing tutors – this time she asked up front rather than waiting until a problem started.</p>

<p>I had wanted her to take a gap year and she was planning it but got so excited about going to college that she decided she wanted to go immediately.</p>

<p>Socially, transferring midyear was hard. She’s very social and makes friends, but doesn’t have people to do stuff with on weekends, so she comes home or visits friends at other schools.</p>

<p>So glad to hear you daughter is doing so well, Shawbridge.</p>

<p>pittpride, my son is truly gifted and seriously dyslexic but also probably ADHD (no formal diagnosis for the ADHD). He’s doing incredibly well at one of the top LACs in the country. But, it has no distribution requirements so he can take courses to match his learning style. He’s as driven as anyone I’ve ever met to succeed. Creates a team around him. Advocates for himself with disabilities office. Has gotten readers, notetakers, in addition to extra time, talks to professors about their expectations to ensure he meets/exceeds them. He works until he’s exhausted and can make himself sick, but will stay up for 72 hours to study for and take finals. Drive, drive, drive. It all adds up. Despite serious LDs, his GPA so far is something like 3.95 as a college junior taking really hard courses. </p>

<p>eastcoast101, for both kids, we met with disabilities services offices after acceptance. We provided the neuropsych testing, possibly stuff from the schools, and asked what they would do for the kid. In some cases, the schools wanted to demur until after the kid accepted. We insisted that the kid wouldn’t attend their school without an answer. They did tell us. ShawSon’s school told us they would do anything the could to help make him successful. They have. His second choice hemmed and hawed about things that should have been no-brainers – which shifted them from 1st choice to 2nd choice. ShawD’s schools have provided all that she needs, which is 50% extra time.</p>

<p>If you’d like to PM me, eastcoast101, I can give you a little more information about the school ShawD is attending, which thus far seems very supportive. ShawSon’s school is a reach for most folks.</p>

<p>Congrats that both kids are doing so well! I have a S & D also. S has ADD; D does not. Both are very intelligent, but D works much harder at school than S and has top grades. S had 1450 (M/R) on the SATs and has all As this year, but I do not see him working very hard. I am nervous for him as he goes into college next year; he is going to a very competitive school and he will be studying engineering. Fingers crossed. D is a sophomore, and, well I hope she doesn’t give herself a heart attack. I would like to see her calm down. She is so driven; I think she wants to be valedictorian.</p>

<p>pittpride, if you can convince your son to get someone to make sure he is on top of the work like the peer mentor ShawD was able to find, that might make a big difference in the first year. I think the difference between doing decently/well in college and having real difficulty has more to do with executive function – staying on top of things – than it does with intelligence for most kids at a given school. For ShawSon, his cousin played that role in HS and maybe freshman year but for the most part no longer does that.</p>

<p>For your D, I think the message could be pick a goal. It is not clear that being valedictorian buys you much. If her drive is to get into an excellent school, what else could she add that would make her more interesting than one more top of the HS class, good test score kid (I’m not saying she is since I know nothing about her, but she like any applicant to supercompetitive schools needs to distinguish herself from what is a crowd to the Adcom community who just plain can’t distinguish between one kid with top grades and scores and another). Being number 5 or 10 in the class and more interesting will be a superior strategy. [She may know all this, but it may be calming to think strategically].</p>

<p>Shawbridge, thanks for the comments. You are right it is executive functioning and not intelligence that would hold S back. He never had issues with tests; it would be really stupid things he’d lose points for like not getting something signed, forgetting some easy small assignment. What is the peer mentor? Is that a program or potentially a service that might be offered thru the disabilities office? S does not know anyone going to his college.</p>

<p>D is crazed with grades, but also many other things. She has been reviewing the SAT website and doing practice questions and problems of the day. She just got 2100 as a sophomore, and will hope to improve her Critical Reading which was the only score below 700 at 660. She spends an incredible amount of time on the school’s science team and has won regional medals and hopes to add state and maybe national medals this year. Also has been dancing for 12 years and is very accomplished there. I have told she will have excellent school opportunities whether she’s ranked 1 or 10 or 15. I think it is part of her nature to be competitive, but she stresses and is so dramatic. I’m pretty laid back and she makes me a little crazy at times.</p>

<p>I am similarly very happy at a small school. It made the adjustment MUCH easier. Also ADD makes memorizing hard. At Swarthmore there are so few tests and so many papers. The school is playing to my strengths and I’m loving it.</p>

<p>At my daughter’s first school, the peer mentor was an older student in the same major as ShawD. He worked with her on management of work but also suggested that she study in this area on that test. Some other schools do training courses for work planning and for taking multiple choice tests. </p>

<p>For my son, we actually used his cousin from home and they did it over the phone. This required him to get and scan and email syllabi, which he sometimes did. He now only needs to be reminded about deadlines like, “If you are going to write an honors thesis in this department, you need to fill out the following form by X date.” His work planning is now better than most.</p>

<p>I have to say that Boston University has layers of assistance for students, especially in writing. My DD has three choices - the disabilities office, which was extremely willing but turned out to be not needed, a Writing Center/tutorial program through the main library on campus, and a writing center within her college. I am impressed! Most importantly, though, she is completely committed to the “freezer technique” that we attempted with varying success to establish in middle and high school. In a nutshell, when you know a paper is due Friday at midnight, you move that deadline up at least 48 hours in your head. You put the completed paper “in the freezer,” meaning in a drawer, out of your brain, etc… for that full 24 hours. Then the 24 hours, you look at it one more time. It is both shocking how a clear head can make the paper look dramatically different, and help you catch all types of things you need to improve. She has combined this with office hours/asking the professor if she is on the right track and it has resulted in a dramatic improvement in her GPA from middle and high school. There is hope ADDers - some kids do BETTER in college!!</p>