warning: long post ahead.
Am I really doing too much? It seems like I am all over the place & want to do too many things all at once.
We got our schedules forms I picked out my classes basically… Great, I thought.
For English, my teacher picked Honors English 2/AICE General Paper (AP-equiv). From what I have heard, it’s really writing intensive and you get at least two quizzes thrown at you a week (whatever we are learning & the vocab quiz that goes along with it). I already have a summer reading project for the class too. I have to read one of the three books of choice & take a test on it a few days after the next academic school year starts. Not too bad. I’ve been doing it since elementary with the exception of the test.
Math is one hell of a fight. I’m supposed to be in Algebra I Honors after a scheduling mistake, however, I stuck with Regular Algebra because I liked the way the teacher taught the class. Bad mistake. In order to get into Geometry Honors, I need an A for the 1st-semester grade. I had an 89/B. He put me into regular Geometry. I now have to get a waiver to get into the Honors class. This means that I’m signing against what my teacher recommends and that if I switch out of the class into Regular, I take the penalty “F.” I like to have options & having that free will stripped away from you sucks. I still have to have a parent conference with my teacher to discuss both points of views. I’m stressing over that as it is.
Why do I want to be put into an Honors Math. class? Because I can’t take certain sciences without out it. For example, in my school, you can’t take AP Bio without obtaining a B in Algebra I Honors or Geometry I Honors. Same goes for Honors Chemistry I & AP Chem. I’ve disadvantaged myself by accident at this point. So to avoid that, I’m going to have to take Geo Honors. I plan on going into the medical field, so these classes are essential to me.
On top of that, I have AP World History. I’ve been reading up on some people’s experience and they have been mixed. Some say the class was hard because of the teacher, some say it was hard because of the load of information extending as far back as 10,000 BC. I’m not sure if I’m going to be able to dedicate enough time for another AP course with what’s been going on. I don’t want to be stuck in a position where I can’t drop out of a class because the deadline date passed. This honestly stresses me out. Maybe this is just first-time AP jitters? I’m not sure.
I also want to get four years of a foreign language. Next year, I’m doing Spanish 3 Honors. ( I go into detail in another post about that) A series of events have caused me to not grasp the basics and fundamentals of Spanish. It’s to the point where I have to get an online tutor to help me relearn old concepts and learn new ones. Basically, in the span of 6-7 months, I have to learn the fundamentals of a language that should have taken me 2 years to do. I have to go hard at it in order to catch up to my peers. I’ve bought every Spanish book you could’ve imagined. I didn’t realize how self-motivated and disciplined you have to be to take a course like this by yourself. Plus, I have 7 courses during the day and one online.
The only enjoyment I’ll get out of my day is my Junior ROTC class next year. So I thought. Jr. ROTC is basically its own organization. With its own set of rules to follow, and events to attend. I feel so scattered with that. I want to be able to dedicate enough time for everything. ROTC seems like it’s going to weigh heavily on me. My brother was in Jr. ROTC too, and all the teachers remember him, and kind of in a way “peer pressured” me into it. I could have said “No,” but my parents & the instructors were really pushing for it. I am quite excited to be doing it though. But I want to think I am doing this for myself, not anyone else.
The only truly enjoyable class I’ll have is probably Drivers Education & Psychology (both one semesters). Preparing for my Learners Permit won’t really stress me out too much. I love learning about psychology and sociology, so once again, I don’t see myself struggling too bad in that class.
I still have to get 100 community service hours for a scholarship. I’ve done 0. & my online class is really kicking me in the butt. It’s so different having someone teach you in class versus being self-taught. I have an A, but really reminding myself that I don’t still have a class to complete each day after I think all my work is done is exhausting. I didn’t expect high school is so difficult. It hits me with curve balls all the time & I don’t know how to handle all the stress that comes along with it.
Do you think I’m going to drown? or time-management is key? (like my guidance counselor said) I’m not really sure. I’m lost, and I know my mental health is declining because of it.