<p>My first son is going off to college this fall. What will be an appropriate estimate for spending money for 9 months period while he is in school? The school he is entering has a mandatory full meal plan and located in an urban environment (Chicago). We will be paying for plane tickets to come and visit home in NJ. </p>
<p>I have no idea what' the appropriate amount to allocate. He is a very responsible kid and not a big spender and has a very good/rational spending habit. Though I am a big believer in "wholesome values" (read: save, save, and save), I don't want him to spend his college years feeling deprived and not being able to engage in "good" activities (meaning, life enriching activities such as going to museums, attending symphony concerts, etc, as opposed to drinking and clubbing). </p>
<p>How about dating? My son told me that boys and guys are supposed to pay for dating expenses. So, if he has a steady girl friend, that's going to up the estimate? By the way, this really annoys me. I am of the generation of women's liberation movement, and we wore like a badge of honor the mantra of paying our own way. I did not let my husband buy me even a bagel out of principle when we were dating. I believe still that it is fundamentally demeaning FOR WOMEN to have the guy foot the bill for the dating expenses. </p>
<p>We expect my son will have saved up about $4500 after all expenses from his paying internship this summer. He wants to go on a couple of trips to Carribean region with this money, so let's say, he will have about $3000 left. Will this be sufficient to last until next summer? Or, should we also chip in additional resources? </p>
<p>I would really appreciate hearing other parents' experience. Please, no moralizing on "let him work during school year if he wants more money". He is a really good, wholesome, responsible kid who worked very hard to get the summer internship (he won an economics/finance competition sponsored by the firm and then hustled big time with the executives he met during the final presentation), and we have the resources. If a little bit more money from us enriches his college experience measurably, I will be happy to chip in. Besides, since he self-studies a lot, if he spends spare time in college doing this as opposed to getting a campus job at a minimum wage, I think he is better off studying for his long term success.....</p>
<p>My son worked last summer and paid for his own expenses this year at college. I think he spent about $1500 total. We paid for his cell phone and put money on his card for laundry, but otherwise he covered all expenses. Chicago might be a bit more expensive than New Haven, but I think your son should be in great shape without any supplementing from you.</p>
<p>Unless your son will be involved in some time consuming sports or ECs, I think he will have plenty of time to work 10 hr/week. Money aside, it’s good for time management, and resume building. My daughter gets 200/mon from us, and we ask her to work while she is in school. We are from NJ also. Our daughter probably spends more than 3000 per school year, but I think it’s because she is a girl. She is very generous with gifts (xmas, birthdays…) for us, she buys makeup,cream, shampoo for herself, and she gets a facial every once in a while. She goes out to eat or cook on weekends when her sorority doesn’t provide food. She’ll go to local grocery store for fresh fruit and Asian food (tofu, curry, noodle…). All that adds up.</p>
<p>As far as dating, my daughter’s experience is most boys will pay the first few dates, but after that they will usually split the bill. Right or wrong, there won’t be a second date if a guy expects her to pay the first date. With her current BF, they take turns paying instead of splitting. At her school, there are a lot of formal parties and dinners (funded by dues), so they don’t spend a lot of money going out themselves. </p>
<p>Boys will tend to spend more money on booze and food. If there is no greek life, which involves dues, guys will chip in to throw parties. My friend’s son at CMU spends most of his money on food, maybe some on alcohol. He is a great cook at 18. This past year he cooked an Easter dinner for 15 kids. My girlfriend gives her son 200/mon, and he is doing fine with it - no dating yet.</p>
<p>I think kids spends more when they are in a city. A dinner could cost 5 or it could cost 100+. Depending on what your family think it’s normal for going out and how often he should be. On CC, you will get a wide spectrum on what’s normal. Our daughter’s spend in college is about the same as in HS for entertainment. Your son’s spend maybe higher if he wants to take advantage of Chicago.</p>
<p>I supplement my kids earnings with $200/month. One went to school in Atlanta: one is at school in Denver; and youngest will be going to school in DC, all expensive locations. Boys do need some money for dating. Boys also need money for that “fourth meal” because they always seem to get hungry later at night–sometimes they eat from groceries they have bought and stored in their rooms, but sometimes they want something more substantial. Also, it seems like a lot of intramural sports (which often have some minor sign up fees/tee shirt costs associated with them) are played in the evenings and the teams often go out together for a bite afterwards. Ditto for kids going out after rehearsals or study groups. They generally tend to go to cheap campus hangouts, it’s just that it adds up over time.</p>
<p>A lot of the informal learning and general college life just seems to revolve around food!</p>
<p>My daughter is on the same campus as Oldfort’s.</p>
<p>She gets $500 per semester from us and earns another $300 or so from a small job. </p>
<p>She never spends it all.</p>
<p>She and her friends are not involved in Greek life, and they don’t seem to do things that require much money. They sometimes attend campus events or go to the movies, but mostly they just hang out together. Even “dating” doesn’t seem to require much money because it rarely involves actual “dates.” Instead, it seems to involve a couple making an effort to spend time together in the context of the things they would be doing anyway. </p>
<p>I mention this because the amounts of money that kids spend can vary dramatically, even on the same campus. Oldfort’s daughter and my daughter go to the same college, but they might as well be living on different planets. </p>
<p>My daughter could spend more if she wanted or needed to – she has plenty of savings. But the need to spend serious money on social activities never seems to arise.</p>
<p>There are a ton of other threads on the topic of spending money. Of course, this is a family decision. BUT I’ll give you our family’s info. We have NO IDEA how much either kid spends for books, discretionary spending and the like because they both had little jobs and savings from summer earnings that covered these expenses. We didn’t give them the money…they earned it and spent what they needed to spend. Both were in very expensive urban areas for undergrad school.</p>
<p>chinablue - Excellent question! D#1 is at a private university, and the kids there delight in shopping at second-hand shops … the ones that sell designer labels. Cheap, cheap, cheap, and proud of it. D#2 is at an OOS public, and some of the kids there spend several thousand dollars a year on clothes. Go figure.</p>
<p>Just FYI…we didn’t pay for clothes for the kids either…but we DID buy them new clothes as gifts for Christmas and birthdays if they wanted them.</p>
<p>When our kids applied for college, we told them that category labeled Misc. meant whatever they could earn. Summer jobs, jobs at school, whatever. I did offer to pay for one yearly cultural activity (sorry kids, warped tour was not included ) They also were responsible for cell phones, gas, clothes, and any other activities they wanted to partake in. We paid for their trips home.</p>
<p>We pay for travel home and back (but no other travel costs), books, and will buy a couple new pairs of jeans or a pair of shoes as needed when our kid is home for summer or winter break. I pay $15 a month toward his cellphone costs, but no more than that.</p>
<p>He earns the rest of his personal expense money from work study… or not. Sometimes he doesn’t want to work very much, so then he has no money. That’s his choice, but he has a dorm room and a meal plan, so it’s not like he’ll be sleeping in a cardboard box if he doesn’t have a dollar to his name. ;)</p>
<p>UChicago doesn’t seem conducive to spending a lot of extra money even though it’s an urban setting. If he has $3k of his own, he should be a great deal better than OK. S just got back late last night and it’ll take a few days to debrief him. There should be more information forthcoming.</p>
<p>No, we pay for D1 clothes. But it’s more basic clothes. She takes care of nice to haves. She is complaining D2 has nicer things now. It’s out of sight out of mind. We just had our discussion where we will no longer give allowance come senior year. It’s a transition to when she will be totally on her own after graduation.</p>
<p>H & I have always paid tuition & for books. The Work Study job is supposed to cover other expenses. But if special items come up, like hiking boots or whatever for a school-related trip, we cover those items. We also pay for cell phone through the 4 years & stop paying for it about 3 months after graduation. Every family’s financial picture is always unique.</p>
<p>My sister spent only about $50, or up to $100, per month while she was in North Carolina. She was very frugal and never asked my mom for more. Most of the money was from her summer job, but occasionally mom would send her $25 as a “relax and go out to eat” gift.</p>
<p>In my experience a kid on a full meal plan will have plenty of money if they work 10 hours a week at minimum wage or are given an allowance for that much money. Like many others I don’t really know how much my son spends because the deal is we pay for room, board and books and the rest is up to him. Up to now he hasn’t worked during the year because summer earnings more than paid for him. That said, we have bought him some clothes, but really not much. Oh and we also pay for his cell phone because it’s part of a family plan. He never goes over on minutes and doesn’t text at all.</p>
<p>No. I thought about setting up a clothing allowance for each of my children while in college, but I was afraid of inadvertently discouraging them from accepting part-time or summer jobs/internships that require a wardrobe completely different from what they ordinarily wear at college.</p>
<p>My kids have used their spending money to buy clothes, on occasion, but these were extra things that they wanted, not necessary basic clothing.</p>
<p>Sorry for the newbie question, but how do you get a ‘work-study job’? Is it part of a scholarship or is it something you apply for specifically?</p>
<p>Usually work study comes as part of the financial aid package. It is possible to get work study even if it was not offered - you would have to negotiate with your FA office for that. Our D did not have it offered initially for next year (though she did have it every other year). An email to her FA office resulted in a higher amount than she had ever been offered before.</p>
) They also were responsible for cell phones, gas, clothes, and any other activities they wanted to partake in. We paid for their trips home.</p>