<p>Hey guys, I used to like to party a lot, but due to a health problem and taking meds, I can't drink anymore otherwise I'd probably die. So I was wondering if I should pick to live in a substance-free dorm in September? On the one hand, I won't have to feel bad if all my roomies are going out and having a great time partying, and I won't feel left out because there won't be talk every weekend of 'getting wasted' since I can't join them. But honestly, I feel like most of the people in the substance-free dorms would be very quiet and shy. I'm not saying everyone in the sub-free dorms are like that, I know it can't possibly be so, but I really think the majority would tend to be more reserved while I want to meet some more ..interesting, outgoing people. Input?</p>
<p>Better yet, a good learning opportunity is here: practicing self-control and discipline. Just because others are drinking doesn't mean you have to indulge. Party with drinkers, and control yourself. What a concept... discipline yourself to be a true individual and unaffected by surroundings. This quite possibly could be the most important lesson you learn in college.</p>
<p>yeah, i also think that the people that live in substance free dorms might be uber lame/boring.You should visit both dorms before you make your choices so you can compare. Practice self control, make sure your close friends know of your health problem so they can remind you not to drink when you're partying.</p>
<p>Yeah, just live in a regular dorm and go to the parties as usual but don't drink. While they're all talking about getting wasted the upcoming weekend, you can laugh at them for all the highly amusing things they did the previous weekend, or something. </p>
<p>The people in the other dorm will have most likely chosen it because they don't want to put up with drunk people coming back at 4 am and wandering around the halls yelling and puking in the showers, or something. That's the reason I tried to go for one, anyway. Or they might be people who think that they're 'non-drinkers' because they only get mildly drunk every other weekend instead of really drunk every Friday and Saturday, like my potential roommates were, thus defeating the purpose of having a special interest dorm in the first place.</p>
<p>just wondering, but what is this health problem you have?</p>
<p>Wow 311, so you're just telling her to put herself in one of the riskiest situations possible in which, given this condition, her life is at stake? Anything can happen at parties.</p>
<p>Anyway, I didn't know that they actually characterized dorms as substance-free at other schools. Shouldn't it be disallowed to have alcohol or whatnot in all dorms by rule, even if not in practice? Being in the non substance-free dorm seems like it would be a more fun dorm experience, but it will always carry some sort of risk. I'd make it very, very clear to your friends/dormmates about your illness, so in any case you're always safe in that regard. I'd think that would minimize the potentiality of problems such that you could live there happily.</p>
<p>sv3a, I guess I should tell her to stop driving a car, going around smokers, and any males because at any moment they could rape/sexually harrass her, right? If something is life threatening, is the best option always to just avoid it all together? I don't think so, practicing self control, and learning discipline is not a bad thing.</p>
<p>That's being irrational. It's not like she has some disability that impairs her in driving, etc. On the same note you could tell people that they should stop drinking because they may drink too much and die. Is that really all that reasonable? No.</p>
<p>This is a different case though, where there is apparently a specific, nonnormal problem that causes her to die if she drinks. In order to minimize the risks, whether the problems could be initiated by her, someone else, or drunken peer pressure is involved, telling her to go to parties I would say is not the best course of action. What would she do anyway? She even said she can't join them/will feel like she's being left out.</p>
<p>Live in a normal dorm, and offer your services as a DD weekend nights for $5 a ride a person home from parties. Good money</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Why don't you go visit or talk to people in substance-free dorms and see for yourself what they are like?</p></li>
<li><p>How is your self-discipline? Would you be able to stick with no drinking in a college setting, or would you persuade yourself that nothing bad will happen so why not just try a little?</p></li>
</ol>
<p>I think it would be a poor idea to think about this issue as a means to DEVELOP self-discipline, given the apparently major downside risk if you do not in fact develop sufficient self-discipline fast enough. </p>
<p>You might be interested in "Smashed" by Koren Zailckas, it covers college drinking and dormitories, among other things:</p>
<p>Adad and sv3a are correct. This is a very serious situation and not a time to develop "self-discipline," if you don't already have it. Again, you should visit substance-free dorms and then determine whether you could happily live there. If so, substance-free is probably the best choice.</p>
<p>Hey all, thanks for the help. I didn't know you could visit the dorms before picking them...do most colleges allow you to do that?</p>
<p>Anyway, to make a long story short, I have a chronic illness that I need to take meds for every day. Most of them say 'do not mix with alcohol', and obviously mixing alcohol and medicine is not a good idea at all. And even if my health condition got better and I was taken off the medicine, my health problem is related to my kidneys anyway, and if I drink alcohol it may lead to a flare and I might become very, very sick. The kidneys or the liver would take longer to break down the substances, and would probably neglect the other things it is supposed to do.</p>
<p>Sorry if I didn't make it clear before, but that's my situation and that's why I choose not to drink, because I'm not stupid. But I just don't know if living in sub-free dorms is my best choice, because I don't want to feel like having this sickness is something restricting me from meeting fun people.</p>
<p>For those of you who have lived in substance-free dorms, what is HONESTLY your opinion of the majority of people in those dorms?</p>
<p>Maybe it's just me, but I am bothered by the two things that I frequently see kids posting on this board: 1) drinking is the way cool, must-do, seemingly end-all-be-all thing and 2) kids who don't drink or party <em>must</em> be lame. Stargirlx, now that you have identified what is required to keep you healthy, concentrate on doing that however you must. My D is not a drinker or partier, but she is an amazing, fun kid to be around. I agree with another poster who suggested that you visit the sub-free dorm at your chosen school, if at all possible. Outside of that, there is no reason why you shouldn't be able to live successfully in a regular dorm. I wish kids would learn that smoking and heavy drinking are <em>way</em> overrated, not to mention serious health risks. Take it from someone who has had to deal with the pain of losing friends and/or loved ones to both alcoholism and lung cancer. It ain't pretty.</p>
<p>If you are able to travel to your college, my advice would be to ask someone in admissions or housing to help you visit the substance-free dorm. If they aren't helpful, I would recommend just going there at a time of day that kids are likely to be around; you can meet people and see for yourself. If you can't readily travel to your college, why not find a substance-free dorm locally and check it out?</p>
<p>If you do decide to try for the substance-free dorm, then my advice would be to get a letter from your doctor stating that in his/her opinion you should be in substance-free housing. One should not fool around with kidney problems.</p>
<p>I recommended the "Smashed" book because it shows, through the author's personal (and I mean personal) experience, how harmful and dangerous college-age drinking can be, especially for women. You will also see in that book how hard it can be at college to abstain when faced with drinking dormmates and a personal habit and history of drinking.</p>
<p>I nmy experience, the kids in the substance free dorm party pretty hard. It's like a mix of people who actually think it will be substance free and are really adamantly against drinking and people who just like it quiet on the weeknights to study but still drink and party on the weekends. Those people always end up in fights of course.</p>
<p>Like above poster said---Its a mix of people who are strictly against drinking and partying of any kind, typically really religious and pretty studious. Plus a few computer geek type guys and some athletes who don't drink. Not saying anything against those types or people, and not trying to stereotype anyone, but that is how I would classify the majority that I know who live in substance free housing</p>
<p>What IS substance free housing anyway? I don't think this is used at my school to my knowledge. I would think that, at least at public schools, you aren't technically allowed to have alcohol in any university owned, on grounds housing. Is this just a term that separates the 'party' dorm from the not so much party dorm, or is it an actual dorm separation used by the university?</p>
<p>Usually substance free are quieter and more religious but that doesn't mean that they aren't fun. They also tend to have a lot of rule-breakers who find it funny that they are breaking all the rules.</p>
<p>At my son's school there are many students who don't drink housed in the regular dorms and also students who drink housed in the substance free dorms (they just don't do it at the dorm). Some of the students I know chose substance free because they felt like there was less chance of getting a roommate who smoked (tho they can't smoke inside, their clothes would still smell like it). I say live wherever you feel you would be the most comfortable and have the most other things in common with the residents. I know my son admires his RA who goes to all the bars and parties, has a great time, but doesn't drink a drop.</p>
<p>i think it's funny because my son thinks the kids that drink and party all the time are the lame and boring ones.</p>