Good point @conmama. I asked because my closest friend has a problem sister and my dear friend will comment that if I say something, it’s fine, but if her sister said the same words, they would be said differently, or mean something more, or just generally be said and be taken with an attached intensity. That got me wondering, is it the words or the attitude?
She doesn’t respond to it at all. I just don’t think she has any awareness as to how much she talks about the physical appearance of others.
I think you did great and your husband did great and probably even your MIL did her best. As times get harder (ie when her health invariably fails and she’ll get crankier and crankier) it will be good to be able to look back on a visit that you managed to make mostly harmonious.
I have to say that cranky sunset comment was the funniest I’d read on this thread. She IS a piece of work but she is your husband’s mom. I hope he shows his gratitude and appreciation for the hard work you did to support their relationship.
For what it’s worth, I’m 5’4” which is short for where I live, and I have learned to appreciate my short squat legs whenever I travel. You can think of her passive aggressive comments with wry satisfaction the next time you stretch your legs on a plane or train.