He could have played for the Mets because he spent his childhood playing lapta.
@EllieMom I agree fully with post #136. Two approaches, the difference between a true college search and just following the herd. Others have pointed out the CTCL colleges, and there are others like Lewis and Clark and lesser known private schools than can be economically competitive with the nearest directional and give young adults a chance to live in a different part of the USA. Most HS grads will be content to go where their friends are, but some (especially the artsy or lefy or GLBT) are being limited by lack of knowledge/interest, especially by the parents.
That was probably true a generation ago, but now we have this awesome thing called “The Internet” where you can find out stuff by “Googling” it. 
@MotherOfDragons Agreed that the info is out there. All the college websites and sites such as CC. Even without using the internet at all, a HS student or parent can learn tons just through a few books, Princeton and Fiske guides, and others on admissions such as ‘College Solution’ or ‘Admission Matters.’ But they have to have the interest to even look. As parents will usually be paying the bill, they should take the lead. Saving for college is really hard, so much that many parents have little or none, and so defer to the in-state schools, which will limit the choices to a handful. Especially if they believe their kids are not ‘Ivy material,’ which is well over 99% anyway. But it is often the ‘ordinary kids’ who could benefit with the option to private schools, with financial or merit aid, if families took just a little time to research it. Some of the happiest converts are the ones who found out about Colleges That Change Lives, for example.
I’ve just read through this thread and I would say that your children are very lucky to have all of you. But, sometimes parents have no idea how to take the lead.
Unfortunately for me, my parents have no idea how to even use a computer and would never spend the money to take me on trips to visit colleges that i’m interested in. And they never completed a high school education.
So, they have no clue about the college admissions process or any of that. Which is why I’m trying to be as acknowledgable as possible about the process and about what I can do (or should be doing) during my high school years. Lurking through CC and other websites have definitely helped. But it is pretty intimidating at first since a lot of the high schoolers here seem to have stellar stats and a hundred EC’s.
Virtual tours are a great substitute to not being able to visit a campus if you would like to. My favorite virtual tour website that I have come across would have to be Virtual Tour Page – YouVisit.
Despite me being hs class of 2019 and me not graduating for awhile, I have found lurking on CC pretty informative. (ex: I had no idea that the PSAT could qualify you for merit aid in Junior year) This website definitely is a good learning tool as long as you avoid the chance me threads.
@Chunkypepe Welcome to CC! Yes, there are the students with ACT scores of 35 and 3.9 GPAs and tons of ECs. Most trying to get into the top 25 universities and top 25 LACs. But there are plenty of schools for just plain good and ‘ordinary’ students. My youngest, also class of 2019, has never heard of CC; wish she were on here instead of me. So congrats for taking the lead. Being the child of parents without degrees with be a boost for you. If you are unable to actually tour college campuses, just make sure they know you are interested in them. Go to the specific college website, to admissions. Find the representative who covers your state/region and send an email. You can thereby be in contact with a college for several years before you even apply. If it is a small school, they will now who you are when your application is read. Other random things:
- Jobs, in summers and throughout the year, are excellent ECs. Also, taking care of a family member.
- Consider using Early Decision if have a clear favorite (or ED2 for a second choice). It is the best way to show a college you really like them. If the cost of attendance is beyond your means, you can get out of it.
- Always do the EFC ahead to get a rough idea of cost.
- Consider small private colleges, despite the high sticker prices.
- Regarding what you need to do in high school, try to take the most advanced classes your high school offers. Colleges look as academic rigor as well as GPA.
- While using CC, pay special attention to the members with thousands, with tens of thousands, of posts.
- Most important, be realistic about the cost of college. You can only borrow $5500 the first year. Merit aid is hard to get, unless you are in the top quarter of that college’s applicants. Most colleges are need blind, but outside the top and wealthiest ones, may not meet all of your financial aid. Have options!
@PetulaClark Thank you! I’m really happy to be a part of the community this early in the game. I learn something new with every thread which is great.
Those are all really helpful tips and I will definitely consider that advice. Thank you so much for the informative reply. I really honestly appreciate the time that you took to answer back.
I had actually never heard of CC either until a few weeks to a month ago when I was researching my state flagship and other OOS colleges. It kept popping up during my searches so I decided to make an account after reading some of the threads. I’m sure she’ll eventually stumble upon CC like I did.
@Chunkypepe, you’ve come to the right place, and starting early gives you lots of times to figure out your options.
In addition to @PetulaClark’s advice, I highly recommend the Financial Aid & Scholarships forum. Do a search on “Questbridge” and “Posse” too to see if either might be relevant to your situation. And if you have specific questions, start a new thread in that forum and explain your situation. There are a lot of experienced parents on there, many of whom will be more than happy to assist you.
When I read that a 2150 on the SAT was “a middling score,” and a poster (another student) told a student that his 2100 “was kind of low” (and it wasn’t an IVY chance thread or anything of the kind), I knew that this place was not “the real world.”
You have to keep that in mind as you navigate the site. Still, as others point out, there is a lot of good information to be found on this site.
I’m not a parent, but my younger adopted sister is a “normal” kid academically. I feel sorry for her at times because she sometimes gets compared to me, and I, to be blunt, am not a “normal” student. It’s definitely important to be reasonable with and understanding of people’s individual inclinations, because otherwise you get kids beating themselves up over things that they aren’t to blame for.
My son is ordinary, probably substandard GPA by the posts I’ve seen on CC. 3.2 weighted GPA. He only took 2 AP classes. He has ADHD and, although didn’t struggle throughout, he did have tough years in some classes. But he did his best. SAT for math and English never broke 1000. He didn’t get accepted into the state flagship, but he did get into the bridge program…start out in CC, then if grades are met a direct admission to the Uni.
He got a 3.82 GPA at the CC taking 17 hours. He was admitted to the Uni. He then took 15 hours, studied his behind off, and got a 3.4, and an invite to the National Society of Collegiate Scholars. Only 10% are invited to join…his is a big 10 school.
This is quite an accomplishment for my son, who has always felt not as smart. His classes weren’t easy, although he didn’t take any STEM type classes, just normal university core…but serious ones. Sometimes they blossom in college.
Nobody needs to beat themselves up while comparing to others and this comparison is just creating artificial type of stress. I never divided anybody into brainy, exceptionally talented vs ordinary. To me, everybody more or less belong to the “ordinary” category with very rare exceptions of inborn talents of magnificent level. However, I divide people into exceptionally hard working and the ones with the “ordinary” level of effort. This is the only thing that makes the difference as far as I can see. Nobody, not a single person out there is exceptionally talented in all areas of study or other activities. But there is a good number of students who achieve straight As and high scores. How is it accomplished? This people know only one thing, if something is exceptionally challenging to them, they put forward exceptional level of effort, they almost get possessed with overcoming the difficulty. There is not tricks, gimmicks of any sort and others do not need to do the same, it is not the point. The point is that vast majority of us and our kids are very ordinary with some of us having the exceptional drive to do exceptionally well. Just to give you an example of what level of effort I am talking about, I am saying that if these people with the exceptional drive “perceive” that it would take them to study 14 hours / day every day for 6 - 7 weeks to do well on certain exam, they will not hesitate a moment to proceed with this level of effort. I personally, do not belong to this category and vast majority of us do not belong there either.
As a parent, I have always found the CC threads and posts generated by parents to be far more helpful and enlightening than most of the ones created by the super-achieving teens that are aiming toward the most selective schools. When I introduced my two daughters to CC, they quickly came to the same general conclusion. They each liked reading about what parents said, especially in retrospect… looking back on past decisions made by their kids.
In fact, my D2, a current HS Senior who is now applying, has likely gotten some negative impressions of certain elite schools just based on the most active posters looking to gain acceptance to those colleges. While I have explained to her that it is not fair to judge a college or even its prospective freshmen class based on a handful or even scores of posters looking to attend there, there is no escaping her negative impression gained by reading some of their posts. Basically, she is saying that she does not want to be surrounded by kids like that for the next four years.
While she herself is a high achieving student and still wants to attend a top-25 or at least top-50 program, she is now more concerned about the overall fit, the specifics related to her proposed major and a # of other factors highlighted by current and former students through surveys like the ones found at Niche ( https://colleges.niche.com/rankings/best-colleges/ ) versus just the singular prestige of saying, "I got into and will be attending (insert HYPSM level school here).
I advise every prospective college student, including my own daughters and their friends, to do at least two things before committing to a particular school… 1) visit it in-person and thoroughly explore there, speaking to current students while there & 2) at least evaluate each school using what I deem to be “fresh eyes”… or other people’s perspectives. For example, the survey results at Niche delve into a # of key areas that actually end up being important while you are physically there in the future as an attending student. Things like food options, dorms, greek life, quality of instruction, safety, parking, etc. actually end up being some of the defining factors about “contentment with your decision” once you are there.
Some of the least happy college students are the ones that selected a college simply for prestige or status or Name ID. There are in fact 100s of quality colleges out there. LACs are a better fit for many. Quality state universities are a better fit for many. As someone who personally went to a top-10 school back in the 80s, I will leave you with this note: I now wish I did not do so. Ultimately, that specific elite school was a poor choice for me. But back in the 80s, we had fewer tools to base our decisions on… and no Internet to help guide our journey.
CC can be such a tool or mechanism for research and clarity. So can the US News rankings and Niche rankings and surveys, college searches at collegeboard.org, etc. But they are all just extra ways to explore, research and learn about various college programs. Also, go there yourself… and apply to reaches, matches and safeties. Assume nothing, and you will not be full of regret come May 2017.
Good luck to all prospective Fall 2017 freshmen applicants this cycle…
Congrats to your son @conmama !
I think my kids are ordinary! My lacrosse player has a 3.6 and got 30 on the ACT - smart but not a genius - honestly I am proudest of her perseverance and hard work
@toomanyteens That sounds like my D. Is she going to play in college? Where is she thinking of applying?
“While she herself is a high achieving student and still wants to attend a top-25 or at least top-50 program, she is now more concerned about the overall fit” - yes, mine was like that too, except she did not bother to check the ranking at all, completely ignored it and choose her in-state public strictly based on her personal list of criteria which had nothing to do at all with anybody’s opinion, including the GC or any of her friends. She ignored the GC recommendations and did not bother to discuss it with her friends. She only compared each college against her personal list of criteria and nothing else. And her top criteria had nothing to do with academics, it was location.
Yes-- she is almost there on her commitment… it is between ESU in PA and Tiffin U in Ohio with a heavy lean to Tiffin right now. She is a 2017
@toomanyteens Great for her! I don’t think mine is going to play. Maybe…maybe club (depending on the level of commitment at the school she chooses), but that’s it. She is a varsity swimmer too, but I don’t think she is going to swim in college either. She doesn’t really love either enough to commit the time in college.
@Cheeringsection …thank you! We were worried what college would bring since school always seemed a challenge. We are just so proud of him,it makes us burst at the seams.