<p>Yes, love that spinach casserole. Just had it for dinner last night.</p>
<p>I was hoping all the snow would be melted before I did my annual bump of this thread but alas, there are still a few mounds hanging around. We did our Passover shopping today (we’re lucky to get an endcap display in groceries in our part of Chicagoland so always head up to Skokie). A teeny bit earlier than ideal but my MIL (almost 97) is in hospice back east so we wanted to get the shopping done in case DH has to leave town suddenly. </p>
<p>From what I gather, mourning (if that’s where we’re at) is suspended for Pesach so we’ll be able to have the seders. I invited my brother and his wife (who apparently are working too hard to make a seder now that both their kids are in college), and our mother (age 88 and broke each of her wrists in separate falls in the last 8 months so no one wants her to do anything but sit). DH might or might not be home, DS and I might have just been east or just about to go, who knows, hard to plan but we’re doing our best.</p>
<p>Very disappointed to learn that Rakusen is no longer making Passover Matzoh, at least in the United States as far as I can tell. Also the Temptee cream cheese wasn’t in stock yet. Otherwise we found what we needed. Plus we essentially keep ingredient kosher rather than rabbi-certified kosher. Since more and more products are omitting corn syrup in favor of sugar, it’s becoming much easier to find acceptable foods on the regular shelves.</p>
<p>I’ll probably end up doing most of the cleaning, planning, cooking, etc. so will keep everything as simple as possible. I’m really looking forward to the four glasses of wine!</p>
<p>I understand the difficulty of planning when elderly parents have to be considered. My 92 yo mother is in a nursing home and I never know when something may happen to change our plans.</p>
<p>Last Passover, S2 came home for seder, but S1 didn’t feel he could take the time. This year it’s reversed. S1 and FDIL are coming since they expect to be moving thousands of miles away later this year and figure this may be the last family seder for them for awhile. S2 is the one who doesn’t want to take the time off. We may try to skype him in during the seder.</p>
<p>Glad to see the return of this thread. It’s like an old friend whose annual visit I look forward to. I rarely check in to the “new” CC but am glad I did today. </p>
<p>This year, I’ve got my gluten free diet to contend with during Passover. Like Marilyn, I keep “ingredient kosher” for the week so was happy to see that the ingredient lists on the new “gluten free” Passover packaged goods are identical to what I use year-round so no need to duplicate.</p>
<p>I bought a coconut macaroon piecrust (first time I’ve seen this) and now need ideas for a filling. I’m planning to make brownies so would like non-chocolate suggestions for the pie filling. Thanks.</p>
<p>The three fillings that came up quickly on Passover pie searches were lemon meringue, key lime pie, and cherry. </p>
<p>MIL is still in hospice and DH is back east waiting. Based on his opinion, DS and I will probably have to fly out in the next couple of days. But he’s been of that opinion for two straight weeks so it’s still “who knows”. Odds are that he will not be home for the first seder no matter what the timing.</p>
<p>I’m planning on simple dishes since I don’t know when I’ll be here; already doing the cleaning. At the moment I’m leaning towards a braised chicken and spring vegetables recipe I found on RealSimple (with carrots and radishes); also found sauteed spinach with basil which can be tossed together at the last minute. And a horseradish potato gratin that can be mostly prepared ahead. I always do matzo ball soup. We bought an 8 layer cake during our passover shopping spree that just needs to be thawed, and maybe I’ll pick up some strawberries to go with it.</p>
<p>And the last tiny heap of snow melted yesterday. :)>- </p>
<p>Okay, I need some input. We share Passover with cousins–the only relatives who live anywhere near us–taking turns hosting. It’s been this way for 30 years. This year it’s my turn, but a serious family issue has led to an estrangement between the cousins and their adult son (hopefully temporary, but who knows), so he, his wife and their kids won’t be there. My S won’t be traveling from out of state this year–he’s hit or miss at best. So we are down to a seder table of four parents and two single adult daughters, and I just can’t seem to work up any enthusiasm for doing all the preparation for this meager group (the older I get, the more overwhelming it is). </p>
<p>None of us are religious, so until now the occasion has been as much about getting together with family–and eating–as it has about Passover itself. Now I’m afraid the whole thing will just be depressing. Every time I pass the Passover displays in the supermarket I just feel dread.Shall I forge ahead anyway, go through the motions, or just gently suggest that we just skip the family seder this year and make other plans? I’d hate for the cousins to think we’re abandoning them. I tried to think of a way to scale things back, but I know everyone will be disappointed if I don’t come up with the usual feast (I’m a good cook). Getting catered items will be even more depressing because it will point up how abnormal this seder is. </p>
<p>I’m soooo torn. Thoughts?</p>
<p>To me it would be more depressing to not have a seder. For our family we have a big gathering with friends and friends of friends one night, usually the first seder and then the second night we only have our family of four so admittedly we are having mostly leftovers the second night for the seder meal but we still do the seder part. </p>
<p>I’m doing a seder for 4 people too. Yes, it’s alot of work for only a few people, but I can’t imagine not doing it. We’re not especially religious either, but Passover was the family holiday when I was growing up, so it’s important to me. I come from a family of immigrants (I’m a first generation American), so Passover was a bigger deal than Thanksgiving. </p>
<p>Invite friends and celebrate.</p>
<p>It’s understandable that all of the angst makes it difficult to look forward to a seder. Ours have always been relatively small; this year will be five of us but we’ve been as few as three. MIL is doing better than DH expected when he went east but he’s staying there through the end. I don’t think we’ve ever been apart at seder since we were married. Brother and SIL are working so hard that they can’t manage to host one, plus both of their kids are in college now. In fact, they work so hard that they don’t want to drive down the tollroad at rush hour and want to instead drive down at noon and drop our 88-year-old mom off here and go work the afternoon at nearby offices. Even though I said that I couldn’t commit to having people show up seven hours early since I need to be able to pace myself to get all the final cleaning and cooking and setup done. But I digress…</p>
<p>I’m not particularly religious but can’t imagine not having one. No matter what else is going on, it allows me to remember my early years when my dad was leading them. I find that nostalgia comforting and an intrinsic part of the holiday. So I always am prepared to throw one or both seders. I get out all the special items (seder plate, matzoh cover, Cup of Elijah, special salt water bowl, etc.) and the good china. We seldom entertain so I enjoy setting up the pretty table with the good silver and stemware. </p>
<p>
This is where you should think of yourself first. Consider what is most meaningful to you. Decide what traditional dishes you feel like preparing and don’t go overboard. Take this year as the opportunity to change the format and menu to simpler and easier. You don’t have to tie the changes into the smaller group or the fact that some relatives are missing. Changing things up might make the lack of the usual people less overwhelming. Family estrangements are difficult; they happen in DH’s family (who hold grudges) but fortunately not in mine. Well, I do hold grudges, but I go ahead and invite everyone anyway!</p>
<p>I’m not Jewish but wanted to comment. Marilyn, take care of yourself! Sounds like you have so much on your plate. </p>
<p>Coconut pie crust sounds so good! </p>
<p>Hope it was ok to jump on here. </p>
<p>Just came home from doing the big Passover shopping with DH except for the perishables which we will do next weekend so then let the cooking begin!</p>
<p>bookmama22-I accumulated all of my non-perishables and have my list for the butcher and produce purchases towards the end of the week. 
Last night, I carefully went over how many ounces of ground almonds I actually need for all my recipes as well as how much chocolate. Just wanted to make sure that I have already bought the right amount so that I don’t go into panic mode next weekend. My family is fairly observant-we keep strictly kosher for Passover-and traditionally have one very large Seder with extended family at the matriarch and patriarch’s abode. I do most of the cooking for that, and my aunt makes the gefilte fish and chicken soup. (Second Seder is smaller, at my house with DH’s family.) </p>
<p>Marilyn, great post. I feel exactly the same. Each year, as I prepare for our seder, I savor memories of all who have attended in past years. I can hear them singing in unison or sounding out the Hebrew words in our 60 year old Haggadot. I remember the excitement of youngsters searching for the afikomen. Passover is all about nostalgia and family ties, though we are now sadly very few in number. </p>
<p>Our guests have always been surprised (and initially alarmed) that we go through our books cover to cover. But somewhere along the way, they become absorbed in the history and caught up in the levity that we try to add (e.g. by reading the children’s book “Only Nine Chairs” even when all participants are adults).</p>
<p>I too set a beautiful table which includes a “plague” at each place setting and a treasured paper mache pyramid (alas only three-sided) that my boys made with my father oh so many years ago. And as for the menu, mine isn’t the most traditional but it’s doable for me and it’s kosher for Passover.</p>
<p>worrywart, I am in complete agreement with what you wrote. When we sing Dayenu or Ki Lo Na’eh, I can hear the voices of my long, departed Aunts. I have tried to keep the Seders going, which seems much more difficult with so many family members spread out all over the country. In the “old days” we all lived in Brooklyn!
Which Haggadah did you use?</p>
<p>@MommaJ – I’ve got a long history of doing small seders. I think the suggestion to invite some others was a good idea – but if you are not feeling up to that and no one the family is that religious – you can go for a Seder “lite”. You really don’t have to do the full out meal with every single traditional food your family relishes included. I’d say tone it down, stick with a couple of favorite passover recipes, but keep it reasonable for the number of guests. </p>
<p>Talk to your cousins about what they would like, but I would think that if you decided to skip the seder this year it would only accentuate the pain they are feeling over the estrangement of their son – it might be important for them at this time to know that their extended family is still there for them</p>
<p>My dad was a Hillel director so growing up the first night was a huge college crowd on campus; second night at home. Dad made the same jokes at the same points every year and I try to incorporate them. I think I feel his presence more at seders than at any other time. The Hillel seders used a small version of the first Haggadah shown here <a href=“http://pitts.emory.edu/collections/Haggadoth/index.cfm”>http://pitts.emory.edu/collections/Haggadoth/index.cfm</a>; I have a large fancy copy and it turns out DH used a different print of it growing up. Even the illustrations are nostalgic, especially the four sons!</p>
<p>Our seders stay traditional through the matzoh ball soup but then the menu varies widely depending on how much time we have, how gourmet we feel like being, etc. Also where we’ve been; last year I included sea salt from Bonaire (cruise with Mom), two years ago dates from California, and three years ago peaches from Georgia. One year we did a cold duck salad because the holiday was so late that I didn’t feel like heating up the oven.</p>
<p>This year the menu is quick and simple after the soup since I don’t know when or if I’ll be out of town. I’m trying to get the time-consuming and messiest work done well ahead of time. I already gave the fridge a thorough cleaning as well as the perimeter of the kitchen floor. Upstairs is all clean except the carpet and bathroom. I hope to make the chicken soup Monday if possible, then freeze it for a week. I’ve got lists of what to clean and buy sooner and later; also when I can prepare and cook everything. I’m contingency planned!</p>
<p>I wouldn’t skip having seder just because it’s not going to as many people as usual. Just don’t make as much food. </p>
<p>We will be 30 this year. Our seders are always very noisy and fly by the seat of our pants as we make spur of the moment decisions on what to read and what to skip. We often forget certain parts we like that we then have to go back to. It can be very confusing for guests who’ve never had seder with us before. </p>
<p>I got an easy assignment this year - a green veggie and a fruit salad. </p>
<p>edit: forgot what I came to do on this thread. Some ideas for desserts: <a href=“Closing the Seder With Something New - The New York Times”>Closing the Seder With Something New - The New York Times;
<p>The Union Haggadah, copyright 1923! Everyone seems to love it. Guess that makes them 90+ years old!</p>