<p>Mainelonghorn – we are living maybe something similar with my youngest, so I know exactly what you are trying to say. My prayers go out to you, whatever the situation is. I’m trying to put the college kid’s mess and her occasionally bad attitude all in perspective.</p>
<p>Ha! God’s way of helping you let them fly.
We used to have a saying that kids lose their brains at age 12 and get them back again when they turn 21 (well - men get them back when they turn 30 - and lose them again when they turn 40). It’s true! They turn human again when they hit 21. Or maybe 23.</p>
<p>Word of advice when your young adult is about to say goodbye or Roll Tide, don’t leave your last word(s) as a nag (I asked you to do that 20x), scolding (you didn’t do this or that), or “one more thing”.
It was a weary Sunday morning and I was stressed to the MAX. My first “baby” was leaving for Europe flying solo for the next 16 hours (travel/delay time). I’m not going to see her for a month. I wanted to make sure that she was as prepared as much as I could “nag” her to be. At the airport, I’m picking apart her preparation tactics, not to be hateful but to give her a lesson on thinking ahead. She started to cry and she’s not a cry baby. Instantly, I felt like a witch.
She walked to security alone crying because I was being way too anxious and let the panic take over. I’ve learned my lesson. It’s been hard knowing that she had hurt feelings caused by my anxiety. I realize that it made her feel “less than”.
Next time, I will hug her, simply say I love you, see you in a month and Roll Tide!</p>
<p>asaunmom, don’t beat yourself up!! You are a great mom!!!</p>
<p>Well, last year I was a total basket-case – for the first week that DS was at Bama, I couldn’t sleep, I was so sick with worry – but this year I am handling it better so far.</p>
<p>One word of advice for moms of rising freshmen: Don’t watch <em>Toy Story 3</em> anytime in the next few weeks. :o</p>
<p>^^^Great advice asaunmom. Your daughter knows you love her and that you were only concerned for her well being.</p>
<p>We all get anxious when our “children” fly alone, go off on European adventures or just move into their dorm for the first time, it is normal and difficult to let them go. However, all the “children” will survive more easily and with less angst than their parents. As parents, we worry about their well being, their state of mind, their emotions and their everyday affairs but sometimes we forget that they have their own concerns as well. It is best not to add to theirs by expressing all our thoughts, all our worries, all at once. Pick less stressful situations to go over details and these talks should go smoother. Will we follow that advice all the time? Probably not, however, thinking ahead about these situations and listening to other parent’s advice should help make these transitions easier for you and your student. Unfortunately, this will not make you worry any less.</p>
<p>Agree, about Toy Story 3…always makes me cry…</p>
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<p>Amen to this…</p>
<p>For those of you who have kids that are being ummm “challenging” this time of year, there is a name for it. It is called “Soiling the Nest”. It is supposed to make their seperation and their leaving easier. It is their way of asserting their independance and moving away from our influence.</p>
<p>My dear daughter was really soiling the nest early this Summer, but now has seemed to rein it in and is actually quite sweet and chatty. It is two weeks until we leave and I just when I think that I am calm and collected about this long move to 'Bama, someone will say something and I will tear up. 12 hours away…it’s gonna be tough to leave.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, the kid I’m ready to boot out is NOT my UA bound freshman who will be leaving in less than 3 weeks.</p>
<p>beth’s mom - LOL</p>
<p>If possible, take a family vaca before your child goes to college. We went to Disney World a couple of weeks before older son’s move in and had a nice bonding blast. We booked at the LAST minute (literally days before leaving) and was able to snag some awesome “on property” deals. got the whole pkg…hotel, tix, and dining plan…we still talk about that trip. </p>
<p>With younger son we went to Calif, but we always do that. lol</p>
<p>S and I are doing just that ---- headed to Orlando on Thursday just the two of us. One last hooray…I’ve always heard they are so grown up when they come home for the first time. I have told him that my tears are a result of the fact that UA is so phenomenal and I’m just sad that I can’t go! Not sure he’s buying that theory…</p>
<p>My DD soiled the proverbial nest the few weeks before she left for school and nearly booted us off of campus when we moved her in. Needless to say, she made the transition easy for the whole family. 
however, the first time she came home for a visit I nearly choked to death on my tears when she left to go back to school because I knew how much I would miss her.</p>
<p>DS turned into a little devil the last few months of senior year but I must say that he’s been a delight the past month! He has been staying home to eat dinner with DH and me instead of eating out with his buddies, he’s been coming home early so we can actually talk before bed, and, he literally spreads his giant arms out several times a day to give me one of his bear hugs and says “love you.” instead of pushing us away he’s pulling us in. I think he remembers how emotional I was when his sister left for school, and how much he missed her. Being the sensitive, thoughtful young man that he is I believe he’s trying to make sure that mom isn’t falling apart because she’s launching her baby into the real world. Little does he know…</p>
<p>One more thing, buzymom is right, DON’T watch Toy Story 3 before or after kiddo leaves for school. Been there, done that, baaaad idea! :)</p>
<p>We already had our “big” vacation this year – visited all our old stomping grounds in Massachusetts and Vermont (hadn’t been back in 23 years!). The kids had a blast. Now we’re planning a few days with the whole family at Cheaha State Park (Alabama) en route to Bama for sophomore move-in. If y’all ever are in the Cheaha area, you may want to consider spending a few days there. It is a lovely state park with very nice (and reasonably priced) accommodations, including cabins and chalets. The lodge restaurant is excellent – and they serve wine, very unusual for a state park! Pretty nature trails, nice views, a pool, the works. VERY relaxing. We may spend an overnight there en route home from Bama, too. Highly recommend! 
Just two hours from Bama IIRC.</p>
<p>I can’t wait for mine to head to Bama, but not because she’s fowling the nest. In fact she’s become a regular snuggle bunny, while at the same time being a responsible young woman. She is ready to start a new phase of her life. D has matured so much since last summer. I believe she is going to immerse her self in all the opportunities the university has to offer. </p>
<p>I will miss her completely and we will cry together as we say goodbye, but I am ready to send this beautiful, confident young lady onto the next leg of her journey through life.</p>