My daughter was admitted to Stanford, but we have not visited and cannot make the Admitted Student weekend. Has anyone sent their son or daughter to a school - sight unseen - and have encouraging, or not so encouraging stories to share??
We did - our D had been waitlisted at a top LAC, and made plans to attend a local public university. Then in June she was offered a place at the waitlisted school. She had never visited, and it wasn’t in the budget or schedule to visit before school started. First time any of us stepped foot on campus was moving her in (1,500 miles away).
I asked her if it was as she imagined it would be - and she said it was exactly as she imagined. She loved her four years there.
My mother did this in 1950! She says college was wonderful and the best years of her life! This probably doesn’t help but I thought it was a cute story.
I do think there is a lot to be said for “bloom where you are planted.” Go with a great attitude and make it great!
I did, in 1978.
The first time I saw St. John’s University was when I went to register for classes. A friend had given me directions to stay on the Grand Central to 88th Street-- as opposed to the correct 188th St. When I passed “last exit before bridge” I turned around and figured it out.
Years ago it was quite normal to attend universities without visiting first. I did attend Stanford for graduate school without visiting first. I loved it. Stanford has a very large and beautiful campus. One thing that I noticed once there was that the huge size of the campus makes having a bicycle quite valuable. The fact that the campus is flat makes this more practical (particularly if you happen to pick a year that it doesn’t rain).
My daughters had several cases where they were not able to make admitted student days due to scheduling conflicts. We visited on other days and signed up for a tour of the campus. I do think that visiting the campuses first helped my daughters quite a bit when they were deciding between schools.
You can visit on a day other than accepted student days. I would. One of my kids honestly hated Stanford when we visited (blasphemy on CC, I know, but it is true).
@intparent Stanford made me think of what Stepford University would have been like.
@intparent My kid absolutely hated Harvard when she visited, so you’re not alone there.
It doesn’t really matter why she didn’t like it (I guess I will say I did not consider her reasons to be trivial or inaccurate). College is a huge investment for most families. It is expensive and demoralizing to have to transfer, too. My kids skipped some state EC tournaments to make final visits - it seemed a lot more important to make an informed college choice to us.
If it is possible to visit it makes sense to do so even if it is for a regular information session/tour instead of accepted students day.
I appreciate all your comments; please keep them coming!
I should have mentioned the complicating factors: she is studying abroad now for her senior year and will not be available to visit before having to commit May 1; and we live in Michigan so it would be difficult and costly for me to go. However, I feel irresponsible with a final decision made without seeing campus! To get this far into the process and not check the final box…
Given financial situation, I would like to avoid a transfer at all costs, so maybe this is a small price to pay.
@intparent Do you recall why your student disliked Stanford?
@TomSrOfBoston Do you recall specifically what was unappealing about Stanford? And was that for you, or your student?
If she can’t visit then I’m sure she will be just fine at Stanford. My cousin recently mentioned that she never saw her college before her drop-off day and she had a great 4 years. And congrats on her acceptance!
What’s the option really? Decline Stanford and only choose from a college you have seen? I get there is someone that won’t like a certain college, even the toppy tops. However, when it all comes down to it, it’s still flippin’ Stanford. Besides the school itself, 9 days out of 10 are sunny and 72 degrees. Just don’t think accepting Stanford entails a lot of risk. I get fit yadda yadda yadda, but I can think of much riskier schools to attend site unseen.
I guess you could head out to Stanford with iphone video cam in hand if you are truly concerned. I’d like to think I had/have an idea what my kids like a month before decisions are due, so maybe you could see if for her if you feel it is necessary.
I think tons of international kids just show up - so this happens a lot. We had one guy literally show up with a black trash bag of clothes, that was it. We went from airport to Target to pick up bedding for him then over to school for his very first time seeing it.
@Vnorovy For me. I like urban universities. Stanford was manicured and pristine. It was in the summer so very few students around.
There are many u tubes of college campuses. I’m sure your daughter can spend a few hours doing some research and have a pretty good idea of what Stanford and the surrounding area is like.
YouTube doesn’t give you a sense of the people, which is a significant part of the vibe of a college.
While technically I had visited the school I went to while a junior in HS for a football game it was a very unofficial visit and we didn’t talk to any university personnel.
Then Dad drove me up 13 hours away and moved my stuff in. We had pizza and a beer and then he was gone. I had no parents at any of the orientation stuff at move in time. Plus I moved in 2 days early.
I was on my own to figure everything out.
I had never heard of admitted students days or even summer orientation days until I got on CC. I never made an official visit to either of the two colleges I applied to. Boy my folks were lucky in that area. Contrast to now where I am leaving at 4:00AM tomorrow to go visit one last college for admitted students day, open house another day for major department and D19 gets to also stay on campus one night in the dorms. My whole weekend plus Monday is shot. I won’t get to be a couch potato and grumpy old man all weekend. Damn kids will be on my lawn the whole time I am away. I will probably have to be civil to people and might even have to talk to other adults/parents. The sacrifices we make for our kids.
I know it’s not the same, but my S found virtual tours to be at least fun/interesting. They tend to skew toward showing the best parts (obviously), but at least you get an idea. http://visit.stanford.edu/tours/virtual/